Have you been shopping lately? When you’re waiting in line to pay for your stuff, and a register opens up, the too-cheery clerk says, ” I can help the next guest.” Guest?! What happened to customer? I liked being a customer. It was easy to understand because being a customer implies a transaction. You provide a service or product for me, and I pay you for it. All good! But a guest? That confuses the whole thing. Guests don’t pay for things. If you’re a guest in my home, I’m not going to offer you a drink and then charge you for it- you’re my guest! But now that we’ve over-polited ourselves into calling customers guests, I just leave the store feeling pissed-off and ripped-off because I had to pay for everything. What kind of hospitality is that?

They should also add clowns. Clowns are funny.