That title made me laugh so hard XD

Bump - nerf all bullets

This is Destiny community in a nutshell. Good job.

You wanna know what's worse? I WAS SITTING ON TOP OF A[b] CRASHED SPACESHIP[/b] ON[b] VENUS[/b], EATING A[b] POWERFUL SANDWICH[/b] WHILE BEING [b]HARASSED [/b]BY A[b] F***ING HOLOGRAM OF PAUL MCCARTNEY[/b] WHEN[b] SUDDENLY I WAS CAUGHT IN A GIANT FIREFIGHT[/b] BETWEEN[b] FALLEN AND VEX[/b]. AS THE[b] BATTLE RAGED[/b] AROUND ME[b], I SHOUTED[/b]: "Paul! PAUL MCCARTNEY![b] PAUL I'M HIT...STOP SINGING AND HELP ME![/b] PAAAAUL![b] MY GUN IS RIGHT NEXT TO YOU[/b]... kick it...[b] KICK IT OVER TO ME[/b].... PAUL [b]YOU JACKASS[/b] THROW ME MY RIFLE! I'm losing... shit... I'm losing a lot of goddamn blood..[b].PAUL THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE[/b]... can't find... can't find my f***ing [i]sandwich[/i]... PAUL[b]! THROW ME MY HOAGIE![/b] MCCARTNEY YOU [i][b]FU---[/b][/i]" BEFORE A[b] MINOTAUR CANNON TOOK ME OUT[/b]. [b]THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED[/b]... IF I ONLY HAD A[b] CRAZY BURST-FIRE AUTO SHOTGUN[/b] POWERED BY[b] ALIEN TECHNOLOGY I BARELY UNDERSTAND[/b]! [b]AND NOW I F***ING HAVE ONE! [/b] [b]LORD OF[i] WOOOOOOLLLVESSSS![/i][/b] YOU GET THIS WEAPON FROM [b]A WEIRD ALIEN WITH BIONIC MEATBEATERS[/b] WHO TALKS LIKE A[b] SEX OFFENDER[/b], AFTER[b] KILLING A LOT OF PEOPLE[/b] HE DOESN'T LIKE. Y[b]OU'RE GOING TO DO THIS SHIT ANYWAY[/b] SO THIS [b]EXOTIC DEATHMACHINE[/b] IS JUST A [b][i]BONUS![/i] [/b] [b]THIS GUN IS F***ING POWERFUL![/b] MORE POWERFUL THAN THE TIME I [b]ATE A BRICK OF COCAINE[/b] AND [b]GOT RABIES[/b] FROM [b]TRYING TO MATE[/b] WITH [b]LOCAL BADGER[/b] AND GOT MYSELF BANNED FROM WENDY'S AFTER COMMITTING [b]TWENTY-SEVEN COUNTS OF FELONY ASSAULT[/b] AND ONE COUNT OF[b] BURGER SODOMY[/b]. YOU WILL FEEL LIKE UNBRIDLED, RAW SEXUAL DEATH WITH THIS SHOTGUN IN YOUR HANDS! THIS WEAPON IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A[b] PULSE RIFLE[/b] MATES WITH A[b] SHOTGUN[/b] IN THE MIDDLE OF A[b] RITUALISTIC DEATH-CULT ORGY! [/b] THE [b]RANGE[/b] IS[b] MISLEADING[/b]! THE STAT BAR IS[b] SHORTER[/b] THAN MOST OF[b] YOUR DICKS[/b], BUT THE WEAPON ITSELF HAS[b] LONG REACH AND TIGHT PELLET-SPREAD[/b], LETTING YOU[b] F*** SHIT UP[/b] FROM A[b] LUXURIOUS DISTANCE. BUILT-IN[u] SHOTPACKAG[/u]E AND [u]RANGEFINDER[/u]![i] YESSSS![/i][/b] [b]YOU WILL HAVE AMMO. [/b]SO MUCH[b] F***ING AMMO[/b]. YOU WILL HAVE SO MUCH AMMO THAT[b] THE FBI WILL NOTICE AND SEND AGENTS TO YOUR HOUSE[/b] AND YOU'LL BE LIKE[b] "F*** YOU, [i]TEXAAAAAASSS[/i]!" [/b]AND THEY WILL[b] BURN DOWN YOUR HOUSE WITH A TEAR-GAS GRENADE[/b] SOMEHOW AND[b] KILL ALL OF YOUR FOLLOWERS[/b] BY ACCIDENT[b]. THERE WILL BE BLOOD, FIRE AND TEARS. [/b]JUST LIKE WHEN[b] MY WIFE DIVORCED ME![/b] [b]THIS WEAPON IS A FALLEN FLAK SHOTGUN ON METHAMPHETAMINES.[/b] IT HAS THE[b] HOUSE OF DEVILS[/b] SIGIL CARVED INTO IT, WHICH MEANS [b]IT IS POWERED BY A SATAN[/b] AND[b] CONSTANTLY SPEWS FIRE FROM THE END OF IT[/b]! YOU COULD USE THIS FIRE TO[b] KILL A BUNCH OF SHIT[/b], AND THEN[b] LIGHT YOUR CIGAR[/b] WITH THE END OF THIS GUN AND SAY: "It looks like they've[b] Fallen[/b]... [i]and they can't get up[/i] (puts on sunglasses)..." OR SOMETHING ELSE CLEVER... BUT THERE ARE[b] NO CIGARS[/b] IN THIS GAME SO YOU WILL JUST[b] BURN THE F***ING SHIT OUT OF YOURSELF[/b] AND [b]RUIN YOUR BEARD[/b] IF YOU TRY THAT. [b]I AM ASSUMING YOU HAVE A BEARD IF YOU ARE WIELDING THIS WEAPON.[/b] LADIES, IF YOU[b] DO NOT[/b] HAVE A BEARD, [b]ONE WILL BE ISSUED TO YOU UPON COMPLETION OF ELDER CYPHER BOUNTY. [/b] [b]PLEASE WEAR IT AT ALL TIMES WHILE OPERATING LORD OF WOOOLLLVES![/b] [b]IF YOU ENCOUNTER LORD OF WOLVES IN THE CRUCIBLE IN AN EXTREME CLOSE-QUARTERS MAP:[/b] YOU [b]WILL NOT BE SAVED[/b] BY[b] THE HOLY GHOST[/b]. YOU[b] WILL NOT BE SAVED[/b] BY THE[b] GOD PLUTONIUM[/b]. IN FACT, [b]YOU WILL NOT BE SAVED.[/b] [b]ONE BURST[/b] WILL DROP A GUARDIAN. [b]TWO BURSTS[/b] WILL KILL A GUARDIAN AND CAUSE HIS FIRSTBORN TO DIE. [b]THREE BURSTS[/b] AND YOU'RE [b]JUST SHOWING OFF[/b] THAT YOU HAVE THIS [b]MAJESTIC SEXBEAST OF A WEAPON[/b], OR HAVE F*CKAWFUL AIM! [b]BURN EVERYTHING. BURN IT ALLLL. [/b] [b]LORD OF [i]WWOOOOOOLLLVES![/i][/b] Edit: [b]HERE IS THAT GODDAMN HOLOGRAM OF PAUL MCCARTNEY https://youtu.be/163_C5UVU-I [/b]

Bullets are way unbalanced if enough hit me i die instantly

I kick babies for fun

I thought Shesmynerd didn't play Destiny anymore? lol

Bungie your game is broken if I die I can't shoot stuff while I'm dead wtf

[quote]why and how is this trending?[/quote] Because dumb people like reading dumb posts, It makes them feel like they have a decent intelligence level.

Is #sarcasm not a thing or did I miss it? Seems better than satire

Funny and so true. People need to realize just because you die by something doesnt mean it's op, so they really should stop running to the boards and typing that over and over.

Yup. And no one should have jobs outside my immediate area. [spoiler]For those of you that are in other countries, Americans say this [b][i]all the time[/i][/b][/spoiler]

Sign if you've been splattered by the Vessel of Oryx's wonderful Tomb Ship in king's fall. [spoiler]......Signed[/spoiler]

I just got final rounded by a goddamn ice breaker!!1!!!11

ikr i feel the same way. Thorn was only OP when THEY used it

Really man?!?!? It's how games WoRK GoSh!!!! People dire!!!!!1!1 you are stupid for even making a setere poster!!!!!! Gosh, I can't wait to tell me mum how dum u r.

You think that's broken? When I got a rare engram it didn't turn into a year 2 gally. Bungie needs to fix their shįt!!

I got hit by a car

Half Life 4 confirmed

Liking shesmynerd line

You think bullets are op? My titan just had his balls explode when a thrall punched him in the dick... I didn't even realize exos have balls! I guess that explains why cayde keeps trying to get my warlock to take him with her.

Depends on the soup though...if it's chicken and rice I will eat it any day, warm or cold.

is the icebreaker bit a shesmynerd reference?

I really can't believe the savages in this generation. What next? Will I have to worry about having grenades stuck to me so I have a short moment to contemplate my own demise? How can bungie allow this to happen? Where us Deej, I have a complaint to lodge with him.

I know what you mean, just the other day I got shot in the head by a sniper. And wouldn't you know it...I died. Straight bullshit. Bungie plz fix your shit.

The sad thing is there have been non-satirical posts like this already