This is actually really well-written, nice job! Really starting to enjoy these now! [spoiler]Only thing I would say is to lose the conditional tense (being “Pyrus would”, “Lee would”, etc.) outside of dialogue. It feels weird to read something as the character would do something rather than he actually does it. You switched to past tense midway through the story, that read really smoothly and really well. All in all, very nicely written and very fun to read.[/spoiler]