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Editado por ooo2412:
1/22/2014 8:07:20 PM
84
I hit my gf yesterday
wow I feel like crap. I guess im gonna get picked up by the cops soon, so I figured I would tell you guys what happened.
We were having an argument and she went too far. She made a comment along the lines of "your loser father couldn't keep a relationship together and you can't either!". When I was around 11, my parents got divorced and fought for custody. My dad wanted me and my brother because he genuinely loved us. My mom wanted us just to spite my dad. She won, and my dad kinda lost it over the decades.
This was too far for me. I had never, EVER hit a girl before, but it happened so fast I didn't even know I did it.
Basically, I cocked my fist back, and flew it straight into her nose. I thought it would be like the movies where she would get a little trickle of blood. It wasn't. Her nose EXPLODED. I think I must of broken a bunch of cartilege or something because blood shot out of both her nostrils, got all over me, got all over the floor.
She staggered backwards, hit her head hard enough on the wall to leave a dent, and slumped down.
We were both stunned for about 10 seconds before she started crying hysterically and ran into my room and locked the door. So I went to wash my hands, and while I was in the bathroom I heard her run out of the house and take off in her car. That was about 7 hours ago so I guess she didn't go the cops or anything. So later I went home and broke down in tears..
My mom came in the room and when she heard about the story she got scared and said your moving with your auntie and uncle in bel air. I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and had a dice in the mirror. If anything I could say that this cab was rare
but I thought now forget it, yo home to bel-air! I pulled up to a house about seven or eight and I yelled to the cabby yo, home smell you later! Looked at my kingdom I was finally there to settle my throne as the prince of bel-air!
English
#Offtopic
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> Expecting Dinosaur > Getting Fresh Prince Good one.
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5 RespuestasLooool You -blam!-ing bastard. Well played, very well played. 10/10 Although everybody do the dinosaur would have been better, just saying.
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Editado por Failure4Life: 1/23/2014 12:10:31 PMDid she go over 21 and bust? [quote]she heard about the story she got scared [/quote] Stopped right there, goddamnit why did I even read this far I should have seen it coming.
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[quote]I hit on my gf[/quote] fixe...w8
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I think this is the second time i fall for this
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Scrolls to the end and sees bel air. I think im on the internet too much.
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Nice ending, really wrapped up the dramatic copypasta
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So good. So goooooood
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I was actually feeling bad and was going to sympathize with you, but then my mom got scared and said "You're going to live with your Auntie and Uncle in Bel-Air".
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Damn you. [spoiler]10/10[/spoiler]
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Pretty good. Pretty good.
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Well played, sir.
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Editado por Ayy Noble: 1/23/2014 1:06:22 PMHoly shit you actually had me going there for a second lol 10/10 I legitimately felt bad your you
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>Skipped to the end expecting Bel-Air. >Is thoroughly pleased.
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I was about to call u a pussy for crying but then u killed it with the bel air part
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You know around seven or eight seems like a big difference.
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1 Respuesta[quote]when she heard about the story she got scared[/quote] I didn't have to read past that. 10/10 I had genuine emotional pain for you, and was preparing my goodbye.
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Editado por carpet brain: 1/23/2014 5:32:28 AMKnew it I [i]bloody[/i] knew it (lel). I was thinking a paragraph through that this would be a reference to that even though it's genuinely one of the darker ones. Nice job though, OP. You get a cookie.
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I saw what you did there.. but I decided to read the rest anyways out of sheer humor
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you steaming pile of compose
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10/10 You had me believing it up until that part with the auntie, right then and there without having to read anymore I knew where it was going and started laughing.
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God dammit.
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Damn I fell for it
