You paint a fairly dire picture. My first piece of advice is to seek counseling at your earliest possible convenience. Now that that is out of the way, let us acknowledge that you reached out to off-topic to let us know what you think of your life. And in so doing will receive responses to your post. You claim that you are emotionally and psychologically unstable. Do you have an official diagnosis from a medical doctor or mental health care professional? Did you graduate high school? Have you ever had a job? Why does your life hinge on having a relationship with a girl? Are you uncomfortable being alone? Do you have a roof over your head? Do you have clothes on your back? Do you have food that you can eat everyday? Do you have heating and air conditioning? I assure you that your life could be far worse. I want you to think about those who are homeless and live on the street. I want you to think about all those people in other countries who live in combat zones never knowing if they're going to live through the next day. I want you to think about people who are either paralyzed or missing limbs and struggle each day just to get around. I want you to think about all those people in the world who circumstances are far worse than yours. But then I want you to realize that you do not have it as bad as you think you do. Then being alone is not the end of the world. And I want you to understand that you have to be comfortable with yourself before you can ever be comfortable with another person. No one is going to love you until you love yourself. In a healthy way of course. The only person who can fix you is you. To suggest otherwise is to embrace dysfunction. When I was younger I was told repeatedly then life is a b**ch and then you die. I'm here to tell you that that is a factual statement. Once you leave High School there are no more participation trophies. You have to find a job, earn a living, and make your life what you want it to be. No one is going to help you, no one is going to Hold Your Hand, no one is going to give you anything for nothing. Having said all of that, I am here giving you advice. Why? Because I want you to be the best person that you can be. But only you can decide what that is and whether or not you want it. I'm that random person in off topic who will try to point you in the right direction, but the rest is up to you.

Gonna keep it simple. Man the -blam!- up. Join the military.

Well... happy birthday.

I've never had a job, and I'm in college, but I'm barely scraping by with low grades. I haven't been in a relationship for almost two years, and I'm still a virgin at age 20. I think all my friends secretly hate me, even though they prove to me time and time again that this isn't the case. I spend most of my time playing video games and browsing the internet instead of actually having a social life. [i][b]But.[/i][/b] After I complete my first year of college, I want to buckle down and take it seriously. I'm sick of only getting low grades, even though I know I'm capable of more but I can never be arsed to put the effort in. I'm going to start working out over the summer after my exams are over. It's mainly for my health, but I'm hoping it'll help my chances with relationships as well. Girls like guys who look after themselves. I'm going to start trusting and interacting with my friends more, because it's not fair on them for me to always assume the worst. I want to stop playing video games as much and focus more on honing my skills as an artist, because frankly that's more important. I get that life can be hard sometimes, but f*ck it man, you gotta try and take control. F*ck waiting around for God dude. We're all gods. You are the master of your own fate.

Americans say join the military. Europe says travel and party.

I could say something about seeking therapy, getting out and figuring out how to enjoy your life. I could say something like suck it up buttercup, blaming others/amorphous beings for your problems is a cop out. Instead, I shall just say Happy Birthday and wish you a good day.

Go out and do something spontaneous with a friend or something. Do something that you will enjoy with a friend or group of friends. One personal example is that my friend and I decided to go to Vegas last year. He had his reasons, and my personal reason was: "I'm bored, Vegas sounds like fun". Another example was when I went to the mountains with a group of friends. Sure, we got snowed in at his cabin, but we were all bored and wanted to do something fun. Better yet, [url=https://tokyo2020.org/en/get-involved/volunteer/about/]try this out[/url]. Life is what you make it.

All your problems can be solved with a prostitute.

But God cant just make your life better, you need to work for it. I know it may seem tough, but you have to go through the bad days to get to the good ones.