Since I got such good feedback on the first post, I decided to make another. I worked through some ideas and wrote a little bit about some of the teachers at the Tower High School (THS). This is all I had time for today, but I'll come up with the other teachers later.
Enjoy!
>[b][u]Cayde[/u][/b]:
The cool teacher that everyone likes.
Arrives late every day, half-drunk (even though he's an Exo) and after a hangover. Always enters by climbing in through the window.
[spoiler][i]*Cayde pulls himself through the window and slowly stumbles over to his desk*[/i]
[b]Cayde[/b]: Okie dokie now, everyone sit down and SHUT UP.
[b]Stormcaller gir[/b]l: Mr. 6, Sunsinger threw up in the garbage can!
[b]Cayde[/b]: Class, what did I tell you about throwing up in my room?
[b]Class[/b] (yelling in unison): Always recycle.
[b]Cayde[/b]: No, the OTHER thing.
[b]Class[/b]: Beer before liquor, never been sicker.
[b]Cayde[/b]: THAT'S RIGHT!
*[i]Sunsinger walks up to Cayde's desk*[/i]
[b]Cayde[/b]: Sunsinger, you're dripping green, bubbly stuff all over my desk and it smells like a Dreg's ass.
[b]Sunsinger[/b]: Sorry Mr. 6, but the trash can is full.
[i]*Cayde looks over and sees vomit overflowing out the sides*[/i]
[b]Cayde[/b]: Sunny, do you know where Ms. Morn's ship is parked?
[b]Sunsinger[/b] (in between gags): Yeah... Why?
[i]*Cayde looks at Sunsinger*[/i]
[i]*Sunsinger looks at Cayde*[/i]
[b]Cayde[/b]: You know what to do.[/spoiler]
>[b][u]Saladin[/u][/b]:
Gym teacher and football coach (surprise surprise).
[spoiler][i]*Students are playing dodgeball in the gym*[/i]
[b]Saladin[/b]: ARE YOU TESTED YET, GUARDIANS?!
[i]*Gunslinger kid gets hit in the crotch with a Nova Bomb and doubles over*[/i]
[b]Gunslinger[/b]: Agh! Mr. Saladin, you said no supers!
[b]Saladin[/b]: And?
[b]Gunslinger[/b]: That stupid Voidwalker chick threw her Nova Bomb at me!
[i]*Saladin walks up to the Gunslinger*[/i]
[b]Saladin[/b]: Yes but I don't see a Nova Bomb, do I?
I SEE A WEAK LITTLE MAGGOT WHO DRANK TOO MUCH OF MOMMY'S MILK THIS MORNING TO MAN THE F*CK UP!
NOW GET BACK OUT THERE, BEFORE I HIT [i]YOU[/i] WITH A NOVA BOMB!
[b]Gunslinger[/b]: But sir, you're a Titan.
[b]Saladin[/b]: Look at my face.
DO YOU SEE EVEN THE SLIGHTEST HINT OF A SINGLE F*CK GIVEN?!
FIFTY LAPS! NOW!
[b]Gunslinger[/b]: Yes, Mr. Saladin.
[b]Saladin[/b]: That's [i]LORD[/i] Saladin to you!
[i]*Gunslinger gets hit in the crotch again with another Nova Bomb on the way*[/i]
[b]Saladin[/b]: Ah, I love this job.[/spoiler]
>[b][u]Variks[/u][/b]:
School principle. Nuff said.
[spoiler][i]*Variks is sitting in his office when the Nightstalker boy walks in*[/i]
[i]*Nightstalker sits down*[/i]
[b]Variks[/b]: You are from Ikora's class, yesss?
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: Yup.
[b]Variks[/b]: And do you have anything to say?
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: I'm sorry for putting a tether in Sunbreaker's locker.
[b]Variks[/b]: And?
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: And for turning Striker invisible when Ms. Rey was taking attendance.
[b]Variks[/b]: Yesss?
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: Look, just tell me what the punishment is so we can get this over with.
[b]Variks[/b]: Punishment. Dismantle mines, yesss?
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: Wait a minute, what?
[i]*beeping sounds from beneath the Nightstalker kid's chair*[/i]
[b]Nightstalker[/b]: Oh.[/spoiler]
For all other Tower High posts, you can find em right here:
[url=https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/176176926/0/0]Tower High Overview[/url]
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Edited by MrJupiter: 3/12/2016 11:59:33 PMLol, nice.
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This is hilarious
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Lol mines beeping from under chair. Hit in crotch. And barf in Eros ship. This stuff is gold
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The "dismantle mines" part made me die XD
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Oh my god, Cayde's story. This is why he's Vanguard leader, man.
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Omg I love caydes story. I was crying at the end XD
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Lol imagine lord Saladin wearing gym shorts and a t-shirt with grease stains on it, but still wearing his helmet XD
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Edited by firstDead: 1/21/2016 7:38:42 PMThis is great!
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Who is the school nurse. You should do one where flint or bubbles gets sent to the nurse.
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Make this a YouTube series
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Ok ive never read these until now and i love this
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[quote][b]Saladin[/b]: Look at my face. DO YOU SEE EVEN THE SLIGHTEST HINT OF A SINGLE F*CK GIVEN?![/quote]
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Cringe
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Crota: The bully that brought a knife to school, but cut up in a knife fight. Oryx: The angry dad that comes to the school and abducts young girls (f*cking creeper). Skolas: The bully that tries to unite a the bullies. Atheon: The silent kid that secretly kills people. Taniks: The homeless kid that gets beaten up every day. Valus: The kid that always wins in fights. Omnigul: The girl that Crota has a crush on. The Queen: The popular girl that everyone has a crush on. Rahool: The teacher that always gives failing grades. Xur: The drug dealer. Cayde: The teacher that doesn't give a shit and has fun with the class every day. Ikora: The teacher that emphasizes the importance of knawledge. Zavala: The AP Shaxx: The P.E. teacher. Variks: The teacher that oversees detention. Eva: That awesome art teacher. The Speaker: The principal. Sweeper Bot: The janitor that is actually a ninja on the side. Eris: The crazy religious teacher that is always relates every topic to Satan.
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I like it I see my self like that as well👍
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Yeessss I can buy house with thissss money
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Ikora should be the librarian and Zavala should be a History teacher, obsessed with past wars
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These posts are awesome. Keep it up!
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Laughed out loud for real. Keep up the good work guardian! Dismantle mines, yesssssss... Haha classic variks
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Just nitpicking, but you can't still be half drunk and be past a hangover haha
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Cayde would be the orchestra/marching band professor.
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Dismantle mines, yesss?
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Lolz best yet
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