You want Tegridy, Bungie? I’ll give you Tegridy! Tegridy is waking up at noon on a Tuesday, shirtless, in a field of your own plants, screaming at the clouds because they “don’t respect the grind.” It’s starting a farm not because you love agriculture, but because you got kicked out of Whole Foods for arguing that kombucha is a government conspiracy. Tegridy is Randy Marsh deciding he’s the moral compass of South Park—while wearing Crocs and a cowboy hat, **** as a kite, lecturing a squirrel about capitalism. That’s Tegridy, Bungie. That’s real Tegridy. Not selling half-baked expansions like "Edge of Fate" for a premium price and using that to fund Marathon.