Here's another one you can add: "I was minding my own business at school the other day when all of a sudden I was surrounded by screaming feminists. They had gnarled claws, horns, goat hoofs and made an unearthly hissing noise. They came out of a hole in the ground that led straight into hell where I could see Satan (Jenny Jones) directing her army. I thought I was done for when suddenly I remembered that I had a shotgun on me (with rounds of common sense). The feminists started to advance towards me, in all their unshaved armpit infamy, preaching anti-male rhetoric and singing "I am woman hear me roar." One of them jumped at me with a two edged blade of double standards, but I counterattacked with a pile of "Get a job." This kept her occupied, but there were more. I took out my shotgun and blasted 10 or 20 of them, but they kept respawning faster than I could finish them off. It was almost as if they had a hidden energy source. Suddenly I noticed the source of all my problems: music coming out from the pit of hell! It sounded like a mixture of Jewel, Celine Dion, Alanis Morissette and Loreena McKennitt all packed together for a mega dose of super suck. I had to act quick before the effects of the -blam!- music would turn me into a permanent dumbass. So I grabbed my shotgun and jumped into the pit. I fell through all the levels of hell, each level conveniently marked with signs saying "Level 1: Expensive Trendy Clothing, Level 2: Dance Clubs For Sluts and -blam!-s.." etc. until finally I reached the last level where Jenny Jones herself resides. She immediately tried to give me a makeover, but I busted out a can of woop ass wrapped in a package of "Shut the hell up," which seemed to wound her ego. She tried and tried, but couldn't get me to conform. Finally she blew up like a zit, and that's the end of my feminist story." [Edited on 08.07.2009 9:15 PM PDT]