Chuck Norris died years ago. Death is just scared to tell him Chuck Norris already been to Mars. Thats why there is no signs of life. Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his house. Its not dead, its just scared to move. A bulletproof vest wears Chuck Norris for protection Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass.At night. When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do. Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund Chuck Norris doesn't walk on land. He swims through it. Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom. Chuck Norris won a staring contest with the sun