{{
`${userDetail.user.displayName}${userDetail.user.cachedBungieGlobalDisplayNameCode ? `#${standardizeBungieGlobalCode(userDetail.user.cachedBungieGlobalDisplayNameCode)}` : ""}`}}
{{getUserClans()}}
Edited by Jdniscool:
8/31/2018 4:20:04 AM
30
Lonely, introverted, and depressed college student
Let me start off with this: I’m 19, college freshman, practically have no real life friends, all my friends are online and I want to be able to have a real life friend group. Problem is, I’m out of my youth, so it wouldn’t be too fun I’d imagine. I’m shy, introverted, ugly, and just think that people wouldn’t like me. I so desperately crave friends and to feel like I belong... what do I do? :(
EDIT: there is a Student Gamers Association. I just emailed the professor asking for a brief rundown of the club.
EDIT 2: gees, where do I begin? I appreciate all the support and didn’t expect many serious replies on this forum, lol. Thank you guys and girls :)
English
#Offtopic
-
2 RepliesHey dude. I’m [b]always[/b] open to talking if you like. And remember, true friends stay at your side every moment. Socialize a bit, see who you like. Experiment. And remember. You’re valued by me man. Again, if you wanna talk, my dm’s are right this way!
-
As a person who thought just like you did and was abused, you don't deserve to feel like that at all. I don't care who you are, feeling like you are alone is the worst feeling to exist. Just go up to people in your class and start with small talk and work your way up that way. Try to be open and honest as possible, people will appreciate you for that. Just be careful of manipulators. Relationships also take work if the other person isn't willing to put any into it, find someone else to be friends with or just have multiple friends. You are not attached to them with iron bars. You can be friends with anyone you want to be friends with. Also, I would look into therapy to help with this problem and if you want a girlfriend. Just ask the person out. The worst thing they can say is no.
-
Fail upward. You are rejecting yourself before you give anyone else a chance to do so. While that gives you a nice sense of control (I don't have to deal with the pain of anyone rejecting me) the result is it keeps you isolated. Anything worth doing....is worth doing **badly** for a while. Stop looking on your social mis-steps as a verdict on your worth as a human being. See them as a learning experience. Also, get out of cyberspace and into the real world. Many friendships develop around common interests and activities.
-
Talk to one person a day, just someone random on campus. Doesn't have to be a cute girl or anything just someone. After some time you'll find a group of people to hang with.
-
Get in shape. Works wonders for both body and soul.
-
[quote]Let me start off with this: I’m 19, college freshman, practically have no real life friends, all my friends are online and I want to be able to have a real life friend group. Problem is, I’m out of my youth, so it wouldn’t be too fun I’d imagine. I’m shy, introverted, ugly, and just think that people wouldn’t like me. I so desperately crave friends and to feel like I belong... what do I do? :([/quote] Unplug and engage people in the real world. That's the only way you're going to change what you're dealing with. And Kelly is right, the only way someone can reject you is putting yourself out there in the first place. [spoiler]You're still here? Put the phone down and start talking to some flesh and blood people. 😂[/spoiler]
-
Simple start drinking
-
2 Replies[quote]I’m shy, introverted, ugly, and just think that people wouldn’t like me.[/quote] Here's something I learned a long time ago. Nearly everybody thinks exactly the same thing about themselves. There are only those precious few who exceed their minds limitations on themselves and can be happy and extroverted anywhere, anytime. So once you get that little fact embedded into your brain, it takes some of the self induced pressure off. Remember - No one is ever thinking about what you expect them to think about you. They are too worried about what you may think of them to ever think about you. Now that you are out of high school, you're likely going to find more people who have grown up and out of those stupid high school preconceived popularity tiers. There are those who will still try to live in them, but they will be the minority.
-
Dude, unless your teeth are jacked up or you smell really bad or something looks don't matter that much. It's about confidence. Secondly just be yourself. So what if some other students don't like you? Who the -blam!- cares? Just work in being happy with yourself and confident. Don't be wishy washy. Like if you say a certain show is your favorite and a girl or someone says they didn't like it at all don't back peddle on it, own it. Who cares if someone doesn't like the same game/show/band/movie you do? Don't try to impress anyone. Just be genuine and it will eventually work itself out. You're overthinking things
-
Try getting into a sport or group activity. Same situation as you, I got into sailing because of my dad, my closest friends come from there. Usually it is easy to make friends when you have same tastes. On top of making friends, it is also healthy. Try soccer (easy to play and people don't mind if you are bad, just play defense and blast it every chance you can to the other side of the field) or maybe some martial arts (people are really respectful in traditional martial arts). Good luck and keep your head high
-
Edited by logan678910 65: 8/31/2018 4:24:04 AMTry /r9k/ [spoiler]JK it doesn't matter how ugly u are u can be the ugliest -blam!- in the world as long as u have confidence people will take a liking to you. But make sure that u don't get overconfident or cocky.[/spoiler]
-
Max is that you
-
This may seem counterintuitive, but think about giving it a try. First, look for friends outside of video games. Gaming communities usually aren’t the that great, and the interaction is rarely meaningful or very personal. Second, and far more important, just focus on serving and loving others. Love doesn’t have to be romantic or even a feeling, it is simply putting others before yourself. If you [i]genuinely[/i] love others through your actions, chances are friends will eventually come to you. Don’t try to fake it though, it’s important that you be sincere and genuinely selfless towards people. I know this may not make sense, but trust me when I say that it works, if you and consistent and patient. If you have any questions about this or anything, feel free to ask or let me know!
-
[quote][quote]I’m shy, introverted, ugly, and just think that people wouldn’t like me[/quote] Step 1. Stop Being Shy Step 2. Stop Being Introverted Step 3. Stop Being Ugly Step 4. Stop Thinking People Just Wouldn't Like You Any questions?[/quote] ^Wyoming
-
Edited by Vicex: 8/30/2018 8:54:36 PMIt's tough but you just need to talk with people in your classes and put yourself out there and try to make some new friends. Edit: If you are depressed though, I would recommend going to the college health dept (usually a nurse or a on-call GP) and talk to the about it so they can refer you to appropriate services.
-
just get through it buddy, for every shitty period in your life there's equally high ones to pass the time focus on your grades &/or gaming, and dont be afraid of conversations- thats where friends often start
-
3 RepliesFigure out who plays any video games you like. Can't go wrong there.
-
3 RepliesEdited by Ogma: Destroyer of Worlds: 8/30/2018 3:17:54 PMI’m introverted and somewhat depressed. In an existential way, I guess. I used to see the bus similarly but the older I got the less I cared. Friends are overrated. Just find things you enjoy on your own and do them. If you really are naturally introverted, embrace it. It took me a while to understand that about myself. I suggest reading a book called Quiet by Susan Cain.
-
I know what it is like to be shy, I'm in the same boat as you. Just find people who share common interests like playing video games or whatever you like to do. If you college has clubs that have your internets, join them and you will easily make friends.
-
Being ugly doesn't matter with friends, unless your trying to date your friends. Then that could possibly be an issue depending on the person. Literally just have to talk to someone and see if y'all got a connection, if so just befriend them. If your self confidence it low (which it seems to be) then just hit the gym, do things you'd take pride in like your body or hobby you enjoy
-
Join your local D&D group, they're likely the most welcoming group of people you will ever meet
-
4 RepliesGo to a party have a few drinks and laugh at the people who get too drunk. Might even meet a few new people too.
-
Dude, find groups that are interested in similar things that you are interested in. Like for me back in the day, it was car shows, Dungeons & Dragons, anime, and heavy metal. if you're looking for friends they don't give a shit if you're ugly or if you're the sexiest damn thing on earth, friends are going to like you for who you are upstairs and you are as a person. Another thing I will tell you is to be 100% genuine. The real, don't try to be cool don't try to do what other people or what you think other people want you to do. People will respect that. And I don't know about you, but I would rather have to truly awesome friends than a hundred meh friends. Last piece of advice find the things that you are good at and have confidence. you need to have self confidence. self confidence draws people to you.
-
Do morning walks, exercise, eat right, discover hobbies. Build confidence within yourself and learn to enjoy yourself. "Getting friends" will only serve to keep you in one place for an extended period of time, and will only help you to forget the things you don't like about yourself. It may seem impossible, but as long as your mind is set on improvement, you're going to feel like you're going in the right direction. I've been in and out of groups of people who I thought were my friends, only to never see them/get a message from them again after months and months of meeting up. At the very least, you won't find any real friends in college. Just do you, and you'll be alright.
-
[quote]Let me start off with this: I’m 19, college freshman, practically have no real life friends, all my friends are online and I want to be able to have a real life friend group. Problem is, I’m out of my youth, so it wouldn’t be too fun I’d imagine. I’m shy, introverted, ugly, and just think that people wouldn’t like me. I so desperately crave friends and to feel like I belong... what do I do? :([/quote] 19 is not out of your youth. Anyway, there is always some activity going on on or around campuses that play to a variety of interests of different students. Go to one or more of these events that pique your interests. Doing so puts you in a area where the subject matter is something you know well and that is an automatic confidence booster. Don’t be afraid to engage in a debate with someone. Sometimes it is a great way to earn respect.
-
... make everybody waffles...
