( Alright, I didn't expect this to trend, so please just privet message me if you wanna help. I want this to die down. [b]Please[/b]. )
TBH I don’t do raids at all and this is because of a lot of reasons.
I’m a really slow person so if you explain everything we’re doing before we do it, I won’t understand. Well.. I will, but my mind tries to trick me and make me think I don't. Too much information given to me makes it that way. As we do something I have to be told right then where to go and what to do. When to come back when to jump and no one really has the patience for that.
Every time I tried to do a raid I was stuck with assholes. Literally. Every. Time. So it's put kind of a mental scar and worry on my shoulders that it'll just keep happening. Someone screaming at someone else about something they did themselves or just being a dick to other people that was a lower light level then them and a bunch of other things… Obnoxious kids who scream and legit cry into the mic because they didn’t get to do what they wanted.
I have [i]severe[/i] anxiety when it comes to talking on mic especially in a group of three or more people.
I only have one person I play with on Destiny and they can hardly be on so i’m literally by myself 99.9% of the time.
I can’t stand being on mic, sometimes I get so panicky I almost have a breakdown.
My mind starts to race and listening to everyone have fun makes my brain try to feed me information that no one wants me there and that i’m a bother because I, [b]myself[/b], can’t make myself speak and join in with everyone unless i’m spoken to directly. (Not the entire time, I don't want to be the center of attention at all. Please n o, but i'm just saying I probably wont even say a peep unless someone speaks to me first )
If someone messes up in the raid I automatically think it’s my fault even if it isn’t and I feel like everyone is pointing fingers at me and hates me for some reason ???? Lmao idk why.
I want so much of the raid gear and my dad never really has time anymore to get on my account and do it for me. So I constantly feel left out in the Destiny community and “uncool” lmao
I'm a 20 yr and I hate how mental problems still gets in the way of my fun constantly. This is why I never really try to make friends on Destiny either because i'm afraid my mental problems will get in the way too much, but yeah. Really the only Raid i've been fully through was Vault of Glass before the light level was raised and actually I did just fine. I did everything we were suppose to correctly, again it's literally my mind that tries to deceive me. I think Crota would be easy, but I'd never know and i'm afraid I never will.
This is what it's like playing Destiny alone with Anxiety feels like. ( And please no negative comments if you have any. )
[spoiler]Moderator edit: This thread has been moved to the #Destiny forum. See [url=https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/140391030/0/0]Cozmo's thread[/url] for more information about the #Destiny tag and its uses.
Feel free to private message the moderator who moved your post, link to topic, for further clarification about why this topic was moved.[/spoiler]
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#Destiny
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I feel ya
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I'm kind of like you as far as talking on a mic. I'm socially slow. By that I mean, it takes me a while to process conversations in a group, so I usually can't respond unless I'm spoken to directly. It makes it hard to find regular raid groups for sure. Not being able to communicate well and ask questions makes the learning curve a little longer. That's why I am just totally patient with my raid groups. I'm usually the last person to leave when the going gets tough, and I try my hardest just to do whatever I'm asked to do. Social anxiety can be a real pain in games like this, and IRL for that matter.
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You need a joint! Fixed me right up. And watch some vids b4 raiding so you know the deal, eliminate the brain farts this way. And remember, overall you will be a forgotten memory within hours no matter what happens, peoples brains are elsewhere, not focused on a scrub or a sherpa they gamed with. And the ones that do dwell on it, remember they live in their moms basement so not anyone to concern you.
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That sounds tough, i hope you find a raid group that is understanding and patient with you. Good luck!
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Edited by UnD3ad_R3Qui3M_: 4/9/2017 4:44:50 PMHey I feel ya, I have some anxiety too and I'm usually quite and chill. If you need a friend we can hang out in Crucible or whatever if you want.
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There are more people like you than you ever imagined.
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Edited by xIDEKAx: 4/9/2017 4:38:28 PMAs stated previously, it does sound as though you have a legitimate anxiety disorder. Definitely seek help if it is affecting your personal life and daily activities. As for this game, and more particularly raiding, if there are people in the group that are yelling because mistakes/accidents are happening, leave that group. I have zero tolerance for those types of gamers. These are the people who blaze through the content with the mentality of wanting to be the "first" or say they don't have "time to waste", then bitch anyways about there not being enough content. Start your own LFG, set your own requirements and make it VERY clear in your description that you are still learning and/or prefer more casual players. Also, make an effort to Block players through your platform so that if you forget who the rude players are, it should warn you before joining party chats.
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Too bad you're on PlayStation, I love guiding noobs through raids.
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1 ReplyI listen to some music quietly when I raid. Usually something like Twenty one pilots or MCR to get my mind off of stress and anxiety
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I was the same way back in year 1 when I was nervous finding a group too raid with. But I realized that Destiny is a game meant to play and meet other people, so I decided to get over my anxiety and do what the game wants me to do. Now I have plenty of people to play with and even joined a clan. I would say just get through it, I know it's hard but that's the natural way of getting through that problem.
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If you need a good raid group that will carry you and help you through all the raids on xbox, add me!!! GT: Mr A Nissan
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Edited by Strafio: 4/9/2017 4:18:32 PMThat sucks dude. I wouldn't have done the raids if I'd have had to put up with all of that. Thankfully I found a good clan where we all get on as friends, and take on the challenges, fail, and then eventually succeed together. If I was to give advice it would be to set up your own LFG and advertise for like minded people to work together on raids at your own pace. Hopefully you'll find people like you that you can bond with and build up a team. If anyone starts being a -blam!- then just kick them - no reason why you should have to deal with that.
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After reading your post again, I did a little research. 5-30% of all people worldwide suffer from anxiety disorders at some point in their lives. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxiety_disorder Most probably go undiagnosed or unreported, so the statistics are actually likely closer to the 30%. I myself have gone through times where I would probably have been told I was suffering from anxiety disorder of some kind, but I never sought help, I just beat myself up over it. Take it from me; don't beat yourself up over it. See somebody professional. It can make your life better. It won't happen right away and it won't be easy, but you owe it to yourself. Don't be like me.
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8 RepliesNo sorry it's just you
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1 ReplyThe sad truth is while there is a lot of good people in the destiny community there is a lot of jerks too. Raids are not everything though, I understand you might feel like your missing some of the content but if it stresses you out it's not going to be enjoyable and there fore I just wouldn't do it. Also your sadly not going to find help here in the forums, talk to a professional about it.
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sounds like you belong on /r9k/ OP
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You better figure out how to trump your anxiety because if that is how you feel about a game life is going to be brutal. That being said, if you have ps4 I would be willing to show you whichever raids you'd like to do. And I am pretty positive I have a couple more people willing to help. My Psn is J-hangdown.
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1 ReplyDrink heavily it helps
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7 billion people in the world, yeah you're not the only one that is like anything.
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Edited by Young Padawan: 4/9/2017 3:38:00 PMSince when life is fair? And looks like you have bigger problems in life than completing a raid...
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I had similar anxiety problems for a long time. I was always worried about talking too loud/quiet or breathing into the mic. Eventually I got a headset with Mic monitoring so I could hear myself, which helped out a lot.
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4 RepliesMate I feel for you it's hard when you have anxiety my advice is try to find a chill person on the forms who you can do strikes and nightfall with and then slowly progress to more people. For all the assholes in the forms I swear to god if people are going to be assholes on the forms you shouldn't be here go do something with your life and stop being dicks to people
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Edited by TheOtherGuy: 4/9/2017 3:25:10 PMRaided yesterday with a few people that i dont know much. I have had a mic but didnt say a word. But they were fine with that because i listened. Thats more important than talking. 1 point you can check on your list.
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1 ReplyI don't think your problem is with destiny, I'd reccomend a therapist
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if i had a higher light on ps4 id help you through all the raids