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Edited by CaptainMericah:
4/19/2017 12:33:40 AM
43
Do Guardians Do the Dirty?
Of all the lore, all the fan fiction, and all the piecing together of events that has occurred since Destiny released, I haven't seen anyone attempt to answer the most important question: Do Guardians [i]do it.[/i] You know what I mean. Do Zavala and Ikora go for a little slap and tickle on the table when the Vanguard Hall closes up at night? Does Cayde-6 show Amanda Holiday his horizontal dance moves in the back seat of his ship? Are exos capable of intimacy at all? Does Lakshmi polish Banshee-44's rifle after a lengthy shooting session?
Seriously, folks, what do our guardians do when they aren't out blowing shit up? There must be some kind of relationships between characters in the game other than what you hear over the tower comms. Are Guardians capable of reproducing, or are they devoid of biological drives since being brought back from the dead?
For context: I started thinking about this after the D2 teaser came out. Cayde getting that drink at the bar has been the only hint at a Guardian satisfying any want/urge other than fighting. It also shows that exos can drink liquid, and presumably taste. Whether or not that liquid was consumed is another story, but it still gets you thinking about what else they can do.
Edit: Much to my surprise, there are actually some serious, supported comments in the post. Thank you to those who've actually taken interest in the topic!
English
#Destiny
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1 ReplyHonestly, if that's canon and they do bang it out when they're not blowing out alien brains and robot milk, I wouldn't feel so uncomfortable with rule 34 of it. Actually, never mind. Rule 34 almost ruined a lot of my favorite franchises anyway.
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Searching for the answer....
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4 RepliesEdited by Luphrie: 4/19/2017 2:24:30 AMIkora riding the High hawk [spoiler]There's a reference in there[/spoiler]
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19 RepliesEdited by HollowedWayfarer: 4/19/2017 1:06:54 AMI got a question for you: of all the named side characters, who would YOU "do the dirty" with?
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For a guardian who has died and come back sex no longer has a appeal. For one reborn onto the battlefield sex now longer has a appeal. For one who fights and fights and fights. In the mud. The dirt the heat and the dark the fight is sex.
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5 RepliesHere's how i can show you. Go to tumblr. Search for destiny rule 34. Fap for 10 hours. Now you know.
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6 RepliesThe thought of Zavala and Ikora......[spoiler]AAAAAAAGGHH!!! GET IT OUT OF MY HEAD!!!![/spoiler][spoiler]SOMEONE GET ME SOME CLOROX!!![/spoiler]
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The Ghost is more than a ghost...
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6 RepliesMy Titan knows what the ladies like.....
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Edited by ThisMahSwamp: 4/19/2017 8:45:12 PMIf you watch closely while you are in the Tower hanger, you will see the KY shipments coming in.
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3 RepliesEdited by LadiesMan217164: 4/18/2017 10:07:27 PMAlthough I don't see the reasoning behind giving robotic war machines fake reproductive organs, (especially a vagina where the space could be used for more important inner workings and they wouldn't be able to become pregnant anyway) they already gave female exos breasts so they might have them. However if exos are human consciousnesses put into robotic bodies it would make sense that women who were turned into exos would have breasts just so the figure of the exo is feminine and they would feel more comfortable like that as it is what they are used to. I assume it would be weird being a women then turning into a bulky, flat, weapon of war. I think a robotic dick would get in the way, it's robotic so you probably can't have it soft so it would have to be hard. Constantly. That's going to show up through the armour. It just wouldn't be practical for male exos to have one. What's the point of giving it a dick anyway? It can't reproduce, it's an Exo. But referring back to the previous point, it would be weird for males to turn into exos and completely lose their dicks, so they'd probably prefer it if they had one to make it feel less strange. The only reason exos would have genitals is if they were requested by those being turned into exos. Basically, I don't know. For combat and their true original purpose it makes very little sense for them to have a penis or vagina. But they might have them because the people that turned into exos might have wanted them to make the Exo body feel more like their old ones or they just wanted them for pleasure - an Exo guardian can feel things like pleasure, they can feel pain as an injured character in game can grunt/scream.
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4 RepliesI think that Shax has a thing for Ikora...
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2 RepliesThe cryptarch used to fcuk me all time.
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1 ReplyEdited by PhantomBrown: 4/19/2017 3:57:21 PMMy warlock looks like an emo slut so probably. Lol
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5 RepliesEdited by Sabre013: 4/19/2017 1:49:01 PMMaybe, considering there is a card where Cayde is using what is essentially the vanguard's google, and says "delete image history." Supposedly it was because he made a giant alien eyeball the background of a terminal, but maybe there was something else. By the way, of course Cayde's account name is "ACEOFHEARTS."
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3 RepliesI've always been curious what a female exo 's lady bits look like.
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10 RepliesFemale exos have boobs. Think about that for a minute.
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1 ReplyEdited by Swiftlock: 4/18/2017 11:33:47 PMThe Guardians are technically the re-animated dead, so now we're toying with the idea of zombies doin' it.
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3 RepliesIm sure banshee-44 can polish his own rifle ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Also... [spoiler] is this what banshee means when he says "keep that thing oiled" [/spoiler]
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Only the forums can answer this -blam!-ing question....
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1 ReplyI dunno ask your guardian
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1 ReplyMy Titan male has a mini harem of my female Warlock and female Hunter.
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The Crimson days' card is a good start dear
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No. Human beings do not have sex.
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4 RepliesWell we know that Light overrides some physical functions- obviously stamina, as we can just run flatout forever, and probably some others I can't think of cause I just got up
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2 RepliesThe experiments in exo sex likely lead in biological adaptation, and mad vex. It's why the weak spot is near the groin.
