[u][b]Auto Rifles[/b][/u] Low Impact - sure would be nice to have High Calibre Rounds right about now Mid Impact - the perfect example of meh High Impact - dear God why do these exist [u][b]Pulse Rifles[/b][/u] Lowest Impact - the epitome of skill, using one puts you on par with divine entities Low-ish Impact - demigod status Mid Impact - utterly pointless High Impact - somehow even more pointless, but you don't feel as bad about those 3 Legendary Marks you just got. [u][b]Hand Cannons[/b][/u] Low Impact - would be pretty good if they could hit anything more than once. The Palindrome - what the above should be. High Impact - very fun to use, allow for comedically bad stats/rolls, hardly worth using seriously unless you get LitC and a low mag size. [u][b]Scout Rifles[/b][/u] Lowest Impact - not nearly as bad as people think they are. Low-ish Impact - competitively viable, overshadowed by you know what. Mid Impact - forgiving, that's about it. High Impact - why aren't more people using these?! [u][b]Matador 64[/b][/u] The best Sniper Rifle in the game. [u][b]Voop-o-matics[/b][/u] Like Matador 64, except they have a charge time, significantly less range, built in RNG (because Bungo know how much we love that) and require a few brain cells to use. [u][b]Sniper Rifles[/b][/u] Flinching sure is fun. [u][b]Sidearms[/b][/u] Matador 64 counter, guaranteed to win 1 engagement in 1000, might get you 700+ trades in exchange for spending much more ammo than the opponent. [spoiler]Cba with Heavies[/spoiler] [spoiler]I'm a lazy slob[/spoiler] [u][b]TL;DR[/b][/u] Get out. I hope you have fun ripping apart my views and ignoring the satire tag. Congratulations on making it this far, your reward is the comments section. Edit: I have to be honest, I wasn't expecting anyone to agree with me or enjoy my brand of humour. That said, yes, at their core these are my views, but here they are distorted for comedic purposes. If you didn't find it funny, I apologise and wish you happy sweating. Edit 2: X number of upvotes, downvotes or hate messages and I will genuinely consider changing my Gamertag (the lonely life of an Xbox player) to Voop O Matic.