Okay...you've stated the problem, albeit in a way that makes it seem exaggerated. You made a point, got it off your chest. Now...what exactly are you going to do from there? I understand venting out your frustrations. Everyone has them. Everyone has problems they run into during their lives that causes them. And laying it out is perfectly acceptable, it can clear the mind and better allow the process of complex thought. However, eventually...that can't just be it. Thoughts have to turn into plans, plans have to turn into action. You have to make a plan of action to turn the life you hate into a life you want. It may not be easy, it may be damn near impossible depending on the specific variables of your individual situation, but eventually you have to work at change to make change happen. I'm not trying sound unsympathetic, i'm just being honest with you. I hope you can make something of whatever you're going through or dealing with, I really do, but after all is said done...doing so, is really a matter that's up to you.