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Destiny

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Edited by Eye_of_Set: 1/3/2017 3:57:32 PM
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We can't all "git gud"...

Sadly it's true. For some of us with disabilities it's a meaningless (and at times hurtful) phrase thrown at us. Our KDs are laughed at Our ELO becomes the topic of mirth. But we carry on regardless. Why ?. Because our struggle is real. Every little achievement is that much sweeter because we've worked for it. It's not a natural gift of split second reflexes and hand-eye coordination but a slow often painful process where we've died a million times before doing something you've probably done in your sleep. To anyone out there who has befriended, supported, teamed with or match made with someone with a disability, Thank you. Edit : this was meant as a thank you. Unfortunately I've been accused of demanding sympathy, pity, playing the disabled card etc. I have re-read what I wrote and I'm pretty sure I'm thanking people for their friendship and support... But I will try again. Thank you. Thank you for making Destiny enjoyable. Is that clearer ??
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  • Edited by FrenetiCreature: 1/2/2017 8:06:39 PM
    Totally, I get you. I was really f****d up in a motorcycle accident. I was paralyzed from it, but later on, I ended up with an infection. I went septic. My blood pressure went really low, so they had to put me on pressers. That medicine caused my legs and hands to die. It looked exactly like I had frost-bite on my legs and hands. Anyway, I ended up losing my legs, just above the knee (I couldn't use them anyway since I was already paralyzed, so whatever.), and most of my right hand. Somehow, my left hand escaped mostly unharmed, even though it looked as bad as the right one did at first. It's just kinda slow sometimes. So now, I only have "nubs" for fingers on my right hand, and my thumb is contracted, which means I can only move it a tiny bit. So... I can't shoot and move the "look" stick at the same time, because my fingers aren't long enough. So, I have a really hard time trying to "track and shoot" at the same time. But I've gotten pretty decent at shoot, then move my hand down so I can push the reticle over to line it up, shoot again, move the stick, shoot again. I also have a hard time hitting buttons, since whatever finger I do have left, is all permanently numb. Ha ha! It sucks, but oh well. I still have fun most of the time. People give me crap about my stats a lot, but I really don't give a crap. I actually feel accomplished that I can even get kills, because most people that know me, and I tell them that I play Xbox, usually look at me kinda funny, and ask, "How the heck do you play video games with your hand like that?" I also never mention it when people blow me sh!t about my stats, because I don't like to "blame stuff" on it. Plus, I just... I don't know exactly what I'm wanting to say here, but... I don't want to give them the satisfaction of having some circumstance to "pity" me, like... "Oh, that's why you suck, because your hand is all f'd up.", if that makes sense. Also because, I feel like, even though I do have a disability, I can still be as good as anyone else. It's just gonna take me longer to be able to get the muscle memory, and to figure out how to get my hand to cooperate with what I want it to do. I will get there. I may not ever be the best. But, I will be good, someday, and not "good, considering my disability". Lol!

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