One good one

>be me >sitting on bus in daily commute to school >get to a certain stop, I pretend that my seat is full by having my backpack on seat next to me >kid gets on, I pretend to look busy by looking at my phone >he always asks to sit in the seat next to me, I've tried moving seats but he finds me >probably because nobody else sits next to me >asks if he can sit here, like he always asks >I don't really want him to, that's why I put my bag there >too polite to say no, I've failed again >every time he gets on, he has at least 1 bottle of axe sprayed on him, so he has that overpowering stench of axe >as I'm moving my stuff, he tries to sit down >on me >hold up there, let me move my stuff >grab my stuff and slide over quickly so he doesn't sit on my leg because he didn't see >sitting there, trying not to breathe through my nose >forgot my gogurt on my kitchen table >no gogurt, no breakfast >having an empty stomach while sitting next to him makes my stomach feel off >I feel something in my nose >it's a sneeze >notagain.jpg >I let out 2 giant sneezes >he doesn't even say bless you >I get irritated, just wanting the bus ride to end >see thread on b.net, decides to make greentext >I begin typing in a passive aggressive manner >he keeps trying to see my screen, but it's a privacy screen and he can't see it >decides to make greentext a bit more extreme >hear song on radio >like a small ship on the ocean >I know what I have to do >this is actually my fight song >I will set big waves into motion >I've only got one match, but I can make an axesplosion

Happy reading... [b]WARNING:[/b] These came from 4chan, so some of them are edgy. [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/oZK073X.jpg[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/JMFGk73.png[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/awU5GL2.jpg[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/crY3dEs.jpg[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/e4CLDNS.png[/spoiler] [i]Edit:[/i] There's moar u guys [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/pclcIuR.jpg[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/lX3D5EQ.png[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/UN3xZC3.png[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/iyMJUY7.png[/spoiler] [spoiler]http://i.imgur.com/dlSKS8b.jpg[/spoiler]

Reply for later

>be 17 >i missed

>be me >it's Friday >get drunk on chocolate milk >typical Friday night >hear someone at my door >hear my phone ring >hear the bathroom door shut >hear it's Friday >remember grammar class in grammar school >a robber breaks into my home >get on the floor >everybody do the dinosaur

>be me >[b]NOW STOP BEING ME YOU UNORIGINAL PLEBIAN[/b] >git gud

>be depressed >call suicide hotline >number is 487673 >hear gunshot >mfw suicide hotline

>be me >24 >just started an agriculture business in Russia (cheaper land, relatively cheap labor) >producing milk (got around 200 cows that I bought with investors money) , got some chickens on the side producing eggs >start seeing some pretty good profits, expand to 600 cows, aiming for 1000 by end of year >business is growing quickly, move there from Germany to supervise directly (at request of investor) >have now been living in small Russian town in the countryside for almost a year >I don't mind, since I'm now making around 25k/month exporting my milk to other east European countries >don't even know how many cows I own right now >Someone knocks on my door >wtf, I have a secretary, how did he get past >then I realize >crap >I've been running a business in Russia and have yet to be visited by the Russian mafia >big guy with oiled black hair wearing a cheap suit, even introduces himself as "Sasha" >says that he "recommends" I purchase their "security services" >I’m not gonna take this crap >tell him to get lost >instantly realize this was an extremely bad move >"very well, friend. I am sorry for inconvenience. my associate will soon be in contact with you for a better offer." >everythingwentbetterthanexpected.jpg >walking home later that night >suddenly a bag gets pulled over my head >something hits me on my head and I go unconscious >wake up bleeding from head, tied to chair in a dimly lit room >after maybe an hour, a fifty something guy wearing a gold chain walks in holding a hammer >frowns at me and introduces himself as Vladislov >"I will show you what happens to foreign pigs that disrespect Bratva" >breaks my kneecaps >I have never felt this kind of pain >start crying and piss my pants; beg him to stop >he spits in my face and leaves >fifteen minutes later >he comes back with a tong >tears off my fingernail >at this point I'm reduced to incoherent begging >manage to say one thing to him >Vladislov >baby don't hurt me >don't hurt me >no more [spoiler]I take no credit. I stole it from Nucking Futs.[/spoiler]

I'm the only one that Greentexts in this joint. -blam!- off. #nuckfut

If you don't agree then I'll put you to nappy-time with my rooty-tooty point and shooty.

HELLO YOU HAVE BEEN SPOTTED BY THE WILD BILBO WHAT DO YOU DO 1:run 2:hide 3:attack Thank you for choosing one :)

There's a website called 4chan specifically designed to accomodate greentext stories, why don't you go there?

>be me >go to b.net >see OP being a -blam!- with this thread >make a greentext about him being a huge -blam!-

Copy of my post

here we go. [spoiler]ill leave this here[/spoiler]