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Edited by BL4DE RUNNER UK:
12/8/2017 12:44:01 AM
443
'Twas the night before Osiris . . . . .
Twas the night before Osiris, and the hype was so thin,
For Bungie had committed, the cardinal sin.
A sequel with less, and drained of all fun,
A new cache of weapons, that are all the same gun.
Selecting your playlist, was needed no more,
Bounties and Factions, were shown to the door.
Shiny new tokens, will now cure all your ills,
And you'll no longer be needing, all those old skills.
Guardians whose teams were made up of six,
They loved PvP, after raids, for the kicks.
Now go to the crucible, and open the door,
Your old team of six, can now only be four.
Osiris is coming, you all should be hyped,
Stay off the forums, with your incessant type.
It will all be alright, with this new DLC,
There's no need to wait for Destiny 3.
But Guardians of old, can see through these tricks,
A flashy new trailer, that shows only best bits.
We know this new content will be devoid of all fun,
No need to chase that new 'god rolled gun'
With 5 story missions, that won't be the best,
And 2 brand new strikes, that are same as the rest.
Raise up your power level, and grind all of that,
Although there's really no reason, to improve on this stat.
Twas the night before Osiris, and few Guardians slay,
While the pre order crowd, are held hostage to play.
I'm sure in a few days, we'll know that it's true,
Curse of Osiris; Two tokens, One blue.
[b]Edit:[/b] Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here, thanks for supporting this thread. Don't forget to upvote and smash that subscribe button. I will be giving absolutely nothing away free for the best comment. Make sure to keep an eye out for my obligatory douchbag 'I'm trending' edit later. Peas out.
[b]Second edit:[/b] Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here again. I got to go off to bed now but if you liked this thread, please hit that subscribe button. It really helps out with the thread when you subscribe and I always appreciate it. We didn't quite get trending but I appreciate all the support. You could all have done better though to be honest, you get the posts you deserve I guess. I'm now going to ask you to send me money without sounding like I'm begging. Support the thread through my Patreon so I can make more shit poetry for y'all, links in the description below. Next thread will be a sarky 'I'm going to leave' post, so keep an eye out an support that too. Peas out.
[b]Final Edit:[/b]Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here again. OK, lets not do that. I'm taking off the mask. Thanks to everybody who upvoted this post. I am genuinely pleased that so many of you liked it. For the record, no malice was intended. It was a satirical sideswipe at the current state of the game , nothing more. I enjoy(ed) Destiny for 3 years, Destiny 2 'lost' the magic somehow. I don't need a list of what was lost, that has been done to death. I hope Bungie will respond to fans and inject fun and 'reason' back into this game, I really do. If you still enjoy playing Destiny 2, enjoy what you like. Do not be swayed by others opinions, It's ok to disagree on what we like. I mean, I love Radiohead, I don't expect everybody else to love them. If you are playing the DLC, I hope Bungie deliver for you, for their sakes. Remember Guardians, the most important rule for a happy life is to have a sense of humour about yourself. Be excellent to each other.
Peas out?
Bungie; I don't hate you guys. I hope you see the humour. I still have faith you will sort things as best you can for fans. I also understand this will take time. Don't let Destiny die; Rise it from the ashes.
[b]EDIT FOR NEW; 'TWAS JUST AFTER OSIRIS:
https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/239840514?sort=0&page=0[/b]
English
#destiny2
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3 RepliesI wish i could give you 5 stars. I suspect more thought and effort went into this OP than Bungie put into D2. Well done and good show.
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1 ReplyYou are the reason I still have hope for humanity
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1 ReplyItscha boii, Blade Runner, back at it again with another awesome Destiny satire-yet-truth poem!
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3 RepliesBump! The Desticles are loving this one for sure! Its OK this game is on life support and will be dead in 2 months tops. What are those bungie loving fanboys going to do when D2 finally kicks the can?
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1 Replylol good one
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2 RepliesMan I tell you want, you legit made my day. I have been in a funk today with this dlc and the rest of my day, but coming here and reading this, I actually got a smile. I thank you very much, and hope to see more poems like this.
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2 Replies120% ratings. I was rapping it out when I was reading the poem, iss that good.
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52 RepliesYou are a joke dude. All you idiots who read this poem are just as dumb as the idiot who wrote it. Look there is an easy solution to this instead of bitching about and at bungie for everything everyday just don't play the game. Move on with your lives get over it. Geezzz ma Neezzz. Like little babies you are. Stop ur crying. If you all would spend your time taking a look what is going on in the real world instead of on these forums your lives would be much better off. Ur like litle babies if you don't get your way your bitch n complaint all day long. Get over it. The decision was yours to get D2 so if don't like it don' buy the DLC's and get a life. They crying and bitching everyday has gotten you nowhere and as a matter of fact if you all remember back a few months ago they said the first DLC would FREE. Now because of all you cry babies they now of your own choice charge you for it. No one took a GUN to your head & forced you to buy it now did they? Get Over It. Move on like alot of other players did. Grow up. It's your choice. Stop crying n bitching n complaining. If the fate of Destiny determines the fate of your lives then i feel sorry for you as you live shallow and lonely lives. CAIO
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[quote]Twas the night before Osiris, and the hype was so thin, For Bungie had committed, the cardinal sin. A sequel with less, and drained of all fun, A new cache of weapons, that are all the same gun. Selecting your playlist, was needed no more, Bounties and Factions, were shown to the door. Shiny new tokens, will now cure all your ills, And you'll no longer be needing, all those old skills. Guardians whose teams were made up of six, They loved PvP, after raids, for the kicks. Now go to the crucible, and open the door, Your old team of six, can now only be four. Osiris is coming, you all should be hyped, Stay off the forums, with your incessant type. It will all be alright, with this new DLC, There's no need to wait for Destiny 3. But Guardians of old, can see through these tricks, A flashy new trailer, that shows only best bits. We know this new content will be devoid of all fun, No need to chase that new 'god rolled gun' With 5 story missions, that won't be the best, And 2 brand new strikes, that are same as the rest. Raise up your power level, and grind all of that, Although there's really no reason, to improve on this stat. Twas the night before Osiris, and few Guardians slay, While the pre order crowd, are held hostage to play. I'm sure in a few days, we'll know that it's true, Curse of Osiris; Two tokens, One blue. [b]Edit:[/b] Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here, thanks for supporting this thread. Don't forget to upvote and smash that subscribe button. I will be giving absolutely nothing away free for the best comment. Make sure to keep an eye out for my obligatory douchbag 'I'm trending' edit later. Peas out. [b]Second edit:[/b] Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here again. I got to go off to bed now but if you liked this thread, please hit that subscribe button. It really helps out with the thread when you subscribe and I always appreciate it. We didn't quite get trending but I appreciate all the support. You could all have done better though to be honest, you get the posts you deserve I guess. I'm now going to ask you to send me money without sounding like I'm begging. Support the thread through my Patreon so I can make more shit poetry for y'all, links in the description below. Next thread will be a sarky 'I'm going to leave' post, so keep an eye out an support that too. Peas out. [b]Final Edit:[/b]Wassup forum dwellers. Ya boy BL4DERUNNER UK here again. OK, lets not do that. I'm taking off the mask. Thanks to everybody who upvoted this post. I am genuinely pleased that so many of you liked it. For the record, no malice was intended. It was a satirical sideswipe at the current state of the game , nothing more. I enjoy(ed) Destiny for 3 years, Destiny 2 'lost' the magic somehow. I don't need a list of what was lost, that has been done to death. I hope Bungie will respond to fans and inject fun and 'reason' back into this game, I really do. If you still enjoy playing Destiny 2, enjoy what you like. Do not be swayed by others opinions, It's ok to disagree on what we like. I mean, I love Radiohead, I don't expect everybody else to love them. If you are playing the DLC, I hope Bungie deliver for you, for their sakes. Remember Guardians, the most important rule for a happy life is to have a sense of humour about yourself. Be excellent to each other. Peas out? Bungie; I don't hate you guys. I hope you see the humour. I still have faith you will sort things as best you can for fans. I also understand this will take time. Don't let Destiny die; Rise it from the ashes. [b]Extra Edit: To shamelessly bring your attention to this thread. Do you really like satire?[/b] https://www.bungie.net/en/Forums/Post/239778752[/quote] Lol even though I’m personally tired of all of the d2 haters, this is ingenious. Props to you, good man
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1 ReplyEdited by GEN JUSTIN: 12/7/2017 6:13:44 AMhttps://www.bungie.net/ga/Forums/Post/219433869 Did this once already man.
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9 Replies‘Twas time to stop making this tiresome poem and rhyme each god damn DLC. Stop riding on the coat tail of the original creator and come up with your own sh!t
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2 RepliesOMG thank you!!!!! You just gave me the best laugh I almost sh!t my pants!!! I can see this as video uploaded to YouTube. Again thank you.
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1 ReplyThis is great. I love this community. I post a comment in here that literally states that I was trolling. Then goes on to state that I was just joking around... I even added, "I wonder how many many of you got upset. I know a few of you did." And what happens? The hate begins to flow, lol I feel like the admitted trolling/joking around forced people to troll themselves. An influx of "show proof," remarks and little comments calling me ignorant. Just FYI, if a logical person read the post they would have likely responded with, "You're stupid," or "Lol, you almost got me." Instead, most people did not read the entire post, picked out what they wanted to hear and trolled themselves. The last few sentences is what I do stand behind, however. The game has it's problems, but is still fun to play. People expect to get expansions similar to those released for World of Warcraft. However, you don't pay a subscription fee. You get what you pay for initially. And that is fair. If Bungie offered a subscription fee for greater amounts/better content, people would complain about that as well. You cannot make all gamers happy. However, you can make the majority happy. For every thread that has 1200 (normally far less) upvotes, complaining about the game, there are thousands more that are just content with it. By numbers, Bungie is doing a good job. The DLC is a solid, fun experience. There you guys go. Try not to have a nerd spasm or morph from your acne ridden, greasy haired weakling state into the amazing key board warriors you prove to be. lol
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Lol nice rhymes. This poem is better than the entirety of the game, sadly.
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(to the tune of Beck's Where It's At) There's a game called Destiny a little up the road From the other games we all know and love A game we saw the excitement turn low Jig-saw jazz and the get-fresh flow Pulling out your hair and throwing the controller Two tokens and a blue Tokens and blues so just clap your hands and just clap your hands Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Take me home in my gaming console! That was a good break from D2 Pick yourself up off the floor With your expectations and your misunderstandings Gamers only, hyponotizers Move through the game like ambulance drivers Shine your shoes with your microphone blues Hirsutes with your parachute flutes Passing the dutchie from coast to coast Let Bungie rock the most Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue What about those who love Bungie regardless? Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Oh, dear me. DLC is a two-horse town That's beautiful, Man Get my refund There's a game called Destiny a little up the road From the other games we all know love A game we saw the excitement turn low Jig-saw jazz and the get-fresh flow Pulling out your hair and throwing the controller Two tokens and a blue Tokens and blues so just clap your hands and just clap your hands Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue Where it's at I got Two tokens and a blue I got Destiny on my mind Destiny baby
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3 RepliesYou will still complain as always no matter what
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1 ReplyThat was impressive that you were so accurate while maintaining the rhymes.
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I enjoy the game and the DLC but this thread had to have my upvote, brilliantly executed.
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A $100 subscription to these poems would have provided me more satisfaction than Destiny 2 ever could! I hate the work the developers have not put in D2 and im dissapointed on this failure. But of course ill remain hopeful. That's all we have left......
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21 RepliesEdited by GraciousEel761: 12/6/2017 3:08:33 AMOMG so clever! Actually pretty good rhyming. Pretty dumb story though. Get over it, you're ruining the forums. LOL at all the replies. I'll try to read and comment on them all.
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And they said I'd be back to play on the 5th, answer in link...
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THIS. IS. [b][u]GOLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/u][/b]
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Oh my gosh, this was so funny. Because it was so true.
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Well played. Entertaining, while addressing the core complaints about D2.
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