Similar to the annual dictionary contests, add, remove, or substitute only one letter in a perk to change it, then write the description of the new perk.
My entry:
Hot Package: Damaging an enemy with this weapon passes them the hot potato and causes damage over time until they damage an enemy.
Edit: a lot of great replies and creativity shown in the forums, nearly an all-positive thread with little or no trolling or hate! It is a niracle (near-miracle) for this forum... That makes me extremely happy.
Some of my personal favorites:
Geoff Edwards
Blank: A short distance teleport that leaves all your shotgun ammo behind. (This was the very first reply to this thread)
Saint Victorious
Wolfpack Hounds: When fired, calls forth the hounds. (Made me think of Mr. Burns from The Simpsons)
Zephyr
Pot Swap: :switching weapons near allies grants a brief smokescreen in your area. (Puff, puff, pass)
Inverted Cat
Shoot to Boot: Shooting Teammates with this weapon automatically sends them back to orbit.
(Talk about unfriendly fire...)
SKTheChef
Spray and Pay: Every shot costs glimmer.
Anomolous147
Hidden Band - plays a little jingle every time you get a kill
Axiive
Extended Sag: Guardian's balls are extremely more noticeable, male exclusive gender perk (Great for tea-bagging)
XDVarenkor
Mida Multi-cool - freeze enemies with successive shots.
Mida Multi-toil - work harder for your kills.
Weeding Frenzy - makes farming more productive.
Feanauro
Third Ewe — Enemies look like sheep while aiming down this weapon's sights.
crypto connect
Army of done: ressurects all the players who said they were quitting destiny in to your own personal army (Most OP of all suggested perk changes)
GRAN APHOTIA
Fluster Bombs: Shells split into flowery compliments upon impact, thoroughly embarrassing the enemy.
Wolf Pack
Hank Burn : Gives you a chance against propain
WildGringo
Raise The Sun: Take time out of this dangerous battle to raise an infant star you found and allow it to grow into a Red Giant.
xNERFxHERDERx
Super Hood Advice: shots fired that miss the target return to the magazine bow bow bow bow bitch I'm bustin at em
Cool Pretzel
Hidden Han: You will always shoot first. (And may thine enemies always have the gun skill of Greedo)
Tech Ronin
Weeper of the Pack: Each time you are killed by Thorn a post is made on the forum in your name bitching about it.
(TechRonin submitted a bunch of great ones, this was my favorite)
Keep 'em coming, and look through for your favorites, a ton of good stuff in this thread.)
English
#Destiny
-
Golfpack Rounds! Golfballs will track the enemy down!
-
Hoe Swap: Defeating a guardian in the crucible grants you opportunity to swap Hoe.
-
1 ReplyGlans half full - every shot fired from the bottom half of a mag risks an accidental 'shot package' in your pants
-
Duck in the chamber: One random bullet makes all enemies hear a quack, disorienting hearing.
-
1 ReplyEdited by SwoIgoroth: 8/21/2015 4:39:32 PMNord of Wolves: Kills with this weapon release a Dovahkin
-
1 ReplyMark of the Devouree: Immediately be kicked to orbit for using thorn.
-
Nulligan - missing a shot has a chance to empty all ammo for that weapon
-
Hidden Han- Han Solo and the millennium falcon give you air support
-
Bicarus: you constantly bicker
-
Solar Damage changed to Polar Damage [b]Polar Damage[/b] = Each precision shot slows the target, 3 consecutive precision shots will temporarily freeze the target.
-
Edited by TechRonin: 8/21/2015 9:52:28 PMFull Auto changed to Dull Auto [b]Dull Auto[/b] = Same perk as Focused Fire
-
Lightweight changed to Fightweight [b]Fightweight[/b] = When held this weapons grants +2 Agility, +2 Recovery and +2 Armor
-
Final Sound: The last shot in magazine causes disorientation.
-
Void Damage changed to Void Samage [b]Void Samage[/b] = After 3 hours of consecutive use an SMS is sent to your girl to let her know your sandwich plate is empty. If single the SMS is sent to your mom.
-
Not Bound by Law changed to Not Found by Law [b]Not Found by Law[/b] = When pursued you can completely vanish (not just cloaked) all attacks are disabled until you reappear.
-
Seeds of Ruin changed to Deeds of Ruin [b]Deeds of Ruin[/b] = All the cheesy shit you do to guardians is done back to you the next match.
-
Edited by TechRonin: 8/21/2015 10:34:13 PMPyromancer changed to Pyodancer [b]Pyodancer[/b] = Rocket kills give you temporary radiance fire wings when dancing near the corpse of you victim
-
Shot package = sh*t package Aiming this weapon allows the users to shoot out straight foot long sh*ts for projectiles.
-
Prototype Trueseeker changed to Prototype Truepeeker [b]Prototype Truepeeker[/b] = Rocket kills give you brief x-ray vision.
-
Snapshot changed to Slapshot [b]Slapshot[/b] = When out of ammo you swing a sniper rifle by the barrel as a melee.
-
2 RepliesShoot to Boot: Shooting Teammates with this weapon automatically sends them back to orbit.
-
Grenade Booster changed to Grenade Rooster [b]Grenade Rooster[/b] = Grenades are replaced by exploding chickens
-
4 Replies[b][i][u]Hidden Han[/u][/i][/b] You will always shoot first. [spoiler]Han shot first[/spoiler]
-
2 RepliesShank burn Wank burn Landing precision shots on an enemy causes it to burn more when u touch yourself.
-
Edited by TechRonin: 8/21/2015 10:52:32 PMCluster Bombs changed to Fluster Bombs [b]Fluster Bombs[/b] = Rockets created Fluster Bombs that suppresses enemies abilities.
-
Triple tap Triple fap Buff said