Similar to the annual dictionary contests, add, remove, or substitute only one letter in a perk to change it, then write the description of the new perk.
My entry:
Hot Package: Damaging an enemy with this weapon passes them the hot potato and causes damage over time until they damage an enemy.
Edit: a lot of great replies and creativity shown in the forums, nearly an all-positive thread with little or no trolling or hate! It is a niracle (near-miracle) for this forum... That makes me extremely happy.
Some of my personal favorites:
Geoff Edwards
Blank: A short distance teleport that leaves all your shotgun ammo behind. (This was the very first reply to this thread)
Saint Victorious
Wolfpack Hounds: When fired, calls forth the hounds. (Made me think of Mr. Burns from The Simpsons)
Zephyr
Pot Swap: :switching weapons near allies grants a brief smokescreen in your area. (Puff, puff, pass)
Inverted Cat
Shoot to Boot: Shooting Teammates with this weapon automatically sends them back to orbit.
(Talk about unfriendly fire...)
SKTheChef
Spray and Pay: Every shot costs glimmer.
Anomolous147
Hidden Band - plays a little jingle every time you get a kill
Axiive
Extended Sag: Guardian's balls are extremely more noticeable, male exclusive gender perk (Great for tea-bagging)
XDVarenkor
Mida Multi-cool - freeze enemies with successive shots.
Mida Multi-toil - work harder for your kills.
Weeding Frenzy - makes farming more productive.
Feanauro
Third Ewe — Enemies look like sheep while aiming down this weapon's sights.
crypto connect
Army of done: ressurects all the players who said they were quitting destiny in to your own personal army (Most OP of all suggested perk changes)
GRAN APHOTIA
Fluster Bombs: Shells split into flowery compliments upon impact, thoroughly embarrassing the enemy.
Wolf Pack
Hank Burn : Gives you a chance against propain
WildGringo
Raise The Sun: Take time out of this dangerous battle to raise an infant star you found and allow it to grow into a Red Giant.
xNERFxHERDERx
Super Hood Advice: shots fired that miss the target return to the magazine bow bow bow bow bitch I'm bustin at em
Cool Pretzel
Hidden Han: You will always shoot first. (And may thine enemies always have the gun skill of Greedo)
Tech Ronin
Weeper of the Pack: Each time you are killed by Thorn a post is made on the forum in your name bitching about it.
(TechRonin submitted a bunch of great ones, this was my favorite)
Keep 'em coming, and look through for your favorites, a ton of good stuff in this thread.)
English
#Destiny
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-blam!- in the chamber
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1 ReplyThot Package: Aiming this weapons causes massive amounts of deez hoez to appear in line of fire
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"[b]Hidden Band[/b]" Plays indie grunge with every press of the trigger.
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Edited by Noctroglyph: 8/22/2015 4:28:57 AM"[b]Turd Eye[/b]" I don't have time to explain why I don't have time to explain (let's just say this explains your low KDR in the crucible).
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Edited by Noctroglyph: 8/22/2015 4:23:00 AM"[b]Final Pound[/b]" Causes your gun to shock you stop running, removing 5 points of health per second you do not run. Note: this perk is a great compliment to [i]Super Food Advice[/i].
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Edited by Noctroglyph: 8/22/2015 4:27:57 AM"[b]Hursebringer[/b]" Spawns a hurse every time you rack up a kill. Or die. [i](Isn't it obvious?)[/i]
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1 ReplyWhite Fail: Skin becomes paler after landing three consecutive precision shots
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1 ReplyEdited by Prophet 12: 8/22/2015 1:47:03 AMCan I switch a letter in a weapons name instead? [u][i][b]RAD JUJU[/b][/i][/u]: Exotic perk: [i]Radical, dude! [/i]: Wielder becomes the most [url=https://www.topatoco.com/graphics/00000001/rb-kingradical-print.jpg]radical man in the radical land.[/url] Targets shot join wielders side because he's just such a radical dude.
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1 ReplyRagefinder. Increases range and causes shotguns to be snipers.
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2 RepliesRagefinder: A kill with this shotgun will spawn a screaming child
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3 RepliesSwitchBalde changed to TwitchBlade [b]TwitchBlade[/b] = Automatically melee an enemy when in proximity even if you don't see them.
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Wife Support: Helps you find your special Gamer lady with every shot
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Edited by Tenacious_B: 8/22/2015 12:16:54 AMFolding Aces: two random bullets do 0 damage and you lose 5000 glimmer
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1 ReplyBend it: (1) your bullets can curve in flight, resulting in tracking. (2) your guardian bends over for bungie so they can fvck you easier. Lend it: you can give your weapons to other guardians. Media Multi tool: the Mida can play music. Basket mag: your magazine now looks like a basket and ammo reserve is stored in another basket. (Easter Guardian!)
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2 RepliesEdited by Shermanator74: 8/22/2015 12:30:01 AMTwo letter change but it's good Spank burn Hitting and enemy from behind in the butt causes lingering damage over time Edit-thanks to a helpful guardian I now realize it is actually a 1 letter change lol
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Third Ewe — Enemies look like sheep while aiming down this weapon's sights.
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1 ReplyHungering Slade Each kill spawns a very hungry Deathstroke
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Ginal Round: This round triggers a vacuum effect before exploding into steaming blood ..sorry
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Edited by SwoIgoroth: 8/21/2015 4:38:23 PMMatebringer: Provides a mate upon finding this weapon
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Nice Breaker. Enemies become allies when shot
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Keeper of the puck Every time you revive a team mate, they are the owner of the hockey puck. The puck will transport you into the NHL.
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4 RepliesCrest of alpha lupi..... Keeper of the sack... You teabag down allies faster and they teabag you faster as well.
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Danish: Press RT during Arc Blade to consume a delicious pastry.
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Hot Swat: killing an enemy summons a swat team to the victims home
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Edited by xNERFxHERDERx: 8/21/2015 6:31:36 PMchain of hoes - precision kills make your guardian an absolute hunk who's completely irresistible to all the ladies. stacks up to 3 times but seriously changed precious to precision
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Golfpack Rounds! Golfballs will track the enemy down!