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Edited by Eiffiks: 11/3/2015 3:16:53 PM
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Unskippable Speaker's speech to cheaters

[Edits at the bottom - sorry that it's getting so long] So, in Cozmo's thread about 'trials of Osiris bans inbound', quite some people liked the idea of an unskippable (looong) cinematic for cheaters caught by the banhammer, in which the Speaker would talk about moral, honesty, light and goodness. What should that speech be? Let's laugh about it since we can't do much more. I believe it should start like this: [quote]IAmACheater spawns at the tower. Droid close to spawn points sees him and walks towards him. 4 droids armed with broomsticks gather around. [b]Droid: [/b]You are requested to follow us to the Speaker's office guardian IAmACheater. Droids with broomsticks take place around the guardian and start walking. The guardian has to follow them. If the guardian tries to walk away he gets hit by broomsticks. Droids should walk slooooowly until the foot of the stairs leading to the Speaker's study. Lord Shaxx, Zavala, Ikora and Cayde come down the stairs while IAmACheater goes up, Shaxx sees IAmACheater and starts shouting while Zavala and Cayde try their best to restrain him. [b]Lord Shaxx, shouting:[/b] you filfthy little rascal, Stay away from my games for [XX time depending on the Ban length] or I'll crush you. Lord Shaxx pushes off Zavala and Cayde and walks away. Zavala gives a dark look at IAmACheater and then walks away without saying anything. [b]Ikora, before walking away[/b]: I expected better of you guardian... Much better... You don't deserve to wield the light... [b]Cayde-6, leaning very close to IAmACheater's Ghost before spitting on the ground and walking away:[/b] Get your guardian... Out of my sight. IAmACheater lower his shoulders and walks up the stairs to the Speaker. Then the Speaker turns and says....[/quote] @ A Cunning Hat proposed the following: [quote]There was a time when you were much more honest. But that was long ago. Until your conscience wakes and finds its voice, I am the one who speaks for The Banhammer. You must have no end of questions, Guardian. Out of a desire for fairness and justice, Bungie created The Banhammer to seek out those who wield lag-switching as a weapon--Cheaters--to protect others who play by the rules but see their journey to the Lighthouse cut short by your hand. I could tell you of the great battles of year one, loot caves and Atheon pushing. I could tell you of the power of self-reviving at the bridge, another ancient enemy. There are many tales told throughout the City to revel would-be corner-cutters. Lately, those tales have stopped. Now... there are only dimmed guardians like you. The Banhammer is coming back. You will feel its enormous weight this time. You must push back the Darkness and let your light return by sitting over in that corner and thinking about what you've done... No, no "buts." Guardians are fighting in the trials this week; you will not be joining them. Your Ghost is ashamed of you. I'm ashamed of you. Eris is more ashamed of you than she usually is. And Zavala wept into his huge shoulder thing last night right where you're standing now. So go enjoy the strike playlist and come back when you realize that what you've done is a very naughty thing.[/quote] I would think of something like this [quote]What does it mean to be a guardian? As a guardian, you’re part of the community – in a way many gamers would not understand. The world of Destiny rests upon our shoulders. Then, there are those that find a path outside our rules. Those that take up with powers they barely understand. So it has ever been with the PvP cheaters. The lagswitcher is a threat from the darkness. But cheaters play without thought. It is time that cheaters got home. To keep PvP and the trials safe from the dark. What does it mean to fight in trials? Flawlessness. Only guardians understand true Flawlessness. True Flawlessness lies in dedication, and fairplay. Flawlessness earned, not abused. The trials are raw crucible. The tests of true fighting skills. Those are required. The banhammer, then, is both the sanction and the answer. And thus, what it means, to fight in trials. What does it mean to be a cheater? I say, it’s all about where you belong. Competitive players go for the wins, Casuals for the fun. But Cheaters don’t belong online. Trials, you wanna play? You better have a good connection, and a good team. A lot of us are just players. But that’s not the only path. Some of us know the difference a lagswitch can make. Some of us… they do DDoS. Mess up with the game. And so, we give them a name… Trials Cheaters. We fight their shadows, bring them down. Never forget the banhammer will be coming. [/quote] What would your speech look like? [quote][b]Edit 1[/b]:[/quote] Using some propositions to make this even better: (thanks for all the comments and feedback) - This would actually be part of a quest ' The redeeming' Upon logging on in destiny and chosing a character (see more on this below), all destinations but earth would be unavailable and a quest would show on screen 'The redeeming' - Step 1: 'Lost the light': Go to the tower to cleanse your light - Step 2: 'A voice in the dark': listen to the speaker's speech (see more about this below) - Step 3: 'Sorry Hollyday': Go apologize to the Vanguard, Lord Shaxx, Banshee and Amanda (see more about this below) - Step 4: 'Shattered Path': redeem yourself and regain your fellow guardians trusts by reviving 50 guardians in the strike playlist - Step 5: 'The cleansing' : Prove your devotion to the community by helping 8 guardians to complete the nightfall during a week with one character only. (Guardians who already had completed it don't count) - about the character: the character chosen at the loading screen would have the quests and the others would be locked until the first 3 steps are complted. Then the cheater can chose to either complete the quest or restart it with another character. - about the speaker speech (step 2): Guess 20 min would be better, and to avoid people just going away while it's running, the speaker would for example go for a walk with the guardian. The guardian has to stay within a certain range, else the speaker will stop, and wait patiently until the guardian comes. There would be 3 checkpoints so that if, for any real life reason, the cheater has to go, he/she doesn't have to start all over again, but just from that checkpoint. - about step 3: the apology round. Apologies to the Vanguard would be made to the associated vanguard master, and would cost the highest rated legendary vanguard gear the player has throughout all his characters and vault.. Apologies to Lord Shaxx, who was really disappointed, would cost the highest rated Y2 exotic owned, which blueprint gets deactivated until you get it again. Apologies to Banshee would cost the dedicated legendary class weapon (meaning it is lost forever) if you have it, else make it impossible to ever get it. Apologies to Amanda would cost a legendary ship or sparrow, which blueprint is then deactivated until you get it again. Completing step 3 would reactivate the destinations. For the ban to be lifted, not only the ban time should be passed but also the quest completed on at least one character. [quote][b]Edit 2[/b]:[/quote] I don't really like the idea of a compulsory shader or emblem to wear, but since it comes a lot in the comment, I guess it could be an option: - If player decides to wear said emblem (something like this: [url]https://sociorocketnewsen.files.wordpress.com/2014/10/2014-10-20-poop.png[/url]), in edit 1, step 4 only requires 35 revives and step 5: 4 guardians
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  • bump

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  • Does anybody remember Resetti the Mole from Animal Crossing for the Gamecube? Anytime you shut off your game without saving, he'd show up at your house and go on a LOOONG rant about why you should save and a bunch of other senseless yapping that you had to click through for like, 5 minutes. Cheaters need their own Resetti.

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    • Edited by Der_Peevmeister: 11/4/2015 12:14:14 AM
      [b] [/b]

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    • Edited by ArcadianSol: 11/3/2015 3:36:42 AM
      Permanent weight of darkness x10, including tower, Crucible, and all raids, with no ability to spawn a sparrow anywhere. That's what my speech would look like. Edit: And maybe have the speaker punch them in the stomach, and throw them off the tower.

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      • Cayde should say he's disappointed because he had money down on the other guys

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      • Edited by gazzy1978: 11/3/2015 10:14:54 PM
        I think cheaters should be subjected to a long and unskippable cut scene of Zavala windmilling his dick for 2 hours.

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        • Wouldn't they just turn off their console?

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        • If this happened i would have to cheat just to see this for myself

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        • I like this idea quite a lot, but I feel like they should get something else. They should get something akin to the old nightfall buff. There would be some physical manifestation on their Guardians and the debugger would greatly reduce all experience gained from all sources. It would also prevent them from forming or joining any fireteams.

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        • Everytime they quit the game their banned for double the time. and it keeps going

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        • Solution: Close application dumb dumb

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          • Give them a buff or badge that said I cheated That way people are aware there are. Cheaters in the game which if reported by 3 people for cheating will be kicked from activity (this would show them how it is when your gaming experience is ruined) Lasted 2 weeks increased by 2 weeks for every confirmed cheat

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            • Also force them to wear 24/7 an unequipable emblem that shows they are a cheater.

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            • Edited by Ebon Hawk AU: 11/3/2015 3:11:04 AM
              All this is nice and well but it will just be a grind not a real penalty... I say name and shame them in the following ways (account wide)... - Force them to wear a specific Emblem that denotes them as cheater (non-removable), - Permanently lower their grimoire score to O and disable any/all associated bonuses, - Stop factions / crucible dealing with them (no reputation gain, no shops), - Where any matchmaking is concerned only match cheaters with cheaters, Do that for extended period of time (depending on infraction) and let's review the results... This is already done by sites like TrueAchievement.com where cheater is found tampering with their achievements and profile. And Xbox Live already matchmakes people with low reputation together. So this is not something new.

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              • The cinematic should have really frustrating puzzles in it to you have to complete every minute or so. The puzzle should have an obvious way to "cheat" in it and if you try to "cheat", you start over. This would be accompanied by a "You haven't learned your lesson here Guardian."

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              • Edited by Omnitron310: 11/2/2015 10:49:55 PM
                I think (and I know this would be impossible, but it would still be awesome) that rather than being banned from the Crucible, cheaters should still be allowed to play. BUT, in every game, a Lord Shaxx bot would spawn on the team opposite them. He would then proceed to spend the entire match hunting them down specifically. He would be invincible to non-cheaters, and nigh-unkillable to the cheaters themselves. He should pound them into the floor with unlimited supers and heavy ammo, all the time spouting his badass quotes or generally trash-talking the cheaters themselves. Then, at the game over screen, when the cheater has been annihilated and their k/d wrecked, all they would be able to see is Lord Shaxx relentlessly teabagging their broken body.

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                • Alright, so after the ban period ends, you get a story mission that you must complete to unlock multiplayer activities again. The mission would be the speech/cutscene outlined in the original post. Throughout the speech, your character will turn his head to either side periodically. You must return his gaze to the speaker. Failing to do so within 3 seconds will cause the quest to fail and you must restart. After the speech, while you walk (alone) back to the hangar to retrieve your impounded ship, Lord Shaxx jumps you, beats you to the ground, and aggressively t-bags you. Looking away will cause the quest to fail and you must restart. Just before you leave, Eris Morn hands you a cursed box of raisins. Consuming them will restore multiplayer access, but will also give the player a 48 hour debuff that reduces all crucible reputation gains to 0.

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                  • Edited by SooperSmurph: 11/3/2015 12:15:59 AM
                    Ahem!!!!!!!! *cracks knuckles, puts on British judge wig* "We are at war, guardian. You know this, you've spent many long hours dispatching the minions of darkness, you know their tactics to be those of deception and betrayal, with no decency or mercy. Perhaps you have spent to long among them?" *The speaker places his hand on the Guardian's shoulder* "Darkness and Light are fundamental forces of the universe, but they are also choices, and you need to know that you made the wrong one. You betrayed your fellow guardians for material gains, or for mere entertainment, if you think about this for a moment, you should realize that what you did was not only wrong, but reprehensible conduct unbefitting a servant of the Light." *The speaker removes his hand, shakes his head, and stares into the Guardian's eyes through his mask* "I cannot take your light from you, that was given by the Traveler, but know that your Ghost has felt only shame since you began to behave this way, and it is your connection to the Traveler, so if it is ashamed of you now, what will happen if your behavior continues?" "For now, you will be restricted from contact with other guardians, until it can be ascertained that your behavior will not taint others, you may still enter the tower, but will be barred from the crucible or any other form of honorable combat, you will have to satisfy any killing urges among the minions of darkness." *The speaker turns away, looking up into the hologram of the Traveler* "I don't know what will become of you, but in this case you have been given a second chance to embrace your path as a guardian, your best chance left is to take it, before your light is gone forever. You will also apologize to your Ghost, perhaps the Traveler will hear it?"

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                    • They should have to complete a mission where the boss is a taken in the shape of their character, and the boss teleports around oddly in the way a lagswitcher does and also shoots the annoying taken captain things.

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                    • Also their ghost refuses to drop to planets with them making every activity return to orbit.

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                      • Cheaters Buff... All engrams and rewards light lvl drop 10. Lower chance of exotics by 20% Lasts 1 week

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                      • Bump

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                      • Why not something like the cheaters pool, similar to gta 5.

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                      • Freakin hilarious! If only...

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                      • Would Cayde spit out oil?

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                        • WHY IS THIS NOT A THING!? [spoiler]Twice as long, Thrice as bright[/spoiler]

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