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10/12/2015 8:14:12 PM
65
Stupidest Thing Your Parent Has Done/Said To You
I really don't have any amazingly hilarious stories in this category with my own parents, but there was one time with my friend's parent...
I was my friend's house to hang out for a while (he was very, very overprotected), and somehow we get started on the subject of Star Wars. Anyway, I tell him a bit about the story and characters, and all of the sudden his mom walks in with this super evil eye, and says something along the lines of, "Star Wars is forbidden in this household, and we won't speak if it. Satan has his grasp in it!" Anyway, I told my parents and their reaction was just like mine, "What the heck is wrong with these people?"
Post your interesting stories down bellow!
English
#Offtopic
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My mom came home yelling at me because I didn't respond to what she texted me WHEN I WAS IN CLASS ::
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More annoying, but.. My dad always says just the last part of brand names items. iPad Mini=Mini Xbox One=One BMW="W" Most annoyingly, names of people, he refers to EVERYONE outside our family by their last name. My friends Nathan (Sparkly for this post, not actual last name) "Your friend Sparkly" even to their face when there at our house. "How's it going Sparkly?" And with some things, people can't understand what he's even referring to. (Dad asking my friend if he has an xbox one after I got one) "hey u got a one?" Friend:"'one' what?" It just gets even worse because he gets angry when people don't understand him when he's talking like that. What do your parents change about words when they talk?
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My father told me god was real.... idiot
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6 RisposteMe: gets 100 on nearly every class and has at least b's through each class Me: gets a c on test Mom: no game for a week Me: gets 100 on all other tests next day Mom when I get home: if u show me u can get good grades and actually commit yourself then I'll give you the game back Me: I got 100 on all the rest of my tests Mom: ok what about it Me: can I have the game back Mom: no Me: but u just said if I do good I get privileges Mom you do get privileges if u hadn't gotten 100's I would have taken it away for 2 weeks Me: but you didn't even know I would get 100's on these tests I hadn't done them Mom: I don't like your attitude go to ur room Me: "face palms "
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So I was leaving the skatepark with my mom dad brother and sister and my mom got mad at me because I ran over a lizard on accident fast forward the drive back home we're driving along and completely hits/run a black crow and kills it me *facepalms* Then my mom goes on to say it was dsuicidal I said sure just like that lizard it was pretty funny though
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Stupidest thing I've ever heard? Step Mom-Hey! Did you know Pluto is bigger than Jupiter? Me-*starts crying*
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1 RispondiMy parents rule is: On Monday-Thursday, I am not allowed on the Xbox or any technology until after dinner. I also have to get off at 9pm. My step dad decided to start a dinner that takes an hour to make at 7:30pm, and takes 15 minutes to eat. I asked if I could get my time back the next day because 15 minutes is nothing, and got a no. Also, my mum once said "my vacuum needs a car" when it is my car needs a vacuum. Ha
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I got grounded for 5 days because I left a cabinet door open
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9 RisposteModificato da The_mighty_hippo: 10/13/2015 11:00:19 PMI lived with my parents on a pasture. Now, my parents were very strict and I was eleven. One day they get a brown horse. My mom wanted to name it dirty, she's weird like that. However, my dad said if I ever ride that horse he would beat my ass, exact words. Horse were my favorite thing and he didn't trust me. Fast forward a couple of days and I'm out side with the horse. My parents come out every once in a while to see if I was trying to ride the horse. I get bored and found a big tire. Being stupid, I get in and start moving down a hill. My parents come out. They see me rolling. They hating. They patrolling trying to catch me riding dirty. [spoiler]teehee[/spoiler]
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9 RisposteMy parents wouldn't let me play E10+ games until I was 10
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Modificato da Aulakauss: 11/4/2015 10:44:46 PMMy mom called me a 'Son of a bitch' once. Totally heated argument, ruined because I busted up laughing. She got pissed, stormed off. ..came back ten minutes later and asked, "Did I [i]seriously [/i]just say that?"
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2 RisposteBought Destiny for a grown ass man obligating me to play that shite game
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2 RisposteMsg me for later everyone reply to me I'm lonely
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1 RispondiMy dad used to be a harness racer and he was training a horse that him and his brother owned, to say the least the horse was a disobedient c**t. So one day my dads brother came down to check on how the horse was and my dad was in the middle of feeding it and petting it. My dads brother asked him how the horse was coming along and recently the horse had improved so my dad replied with "it's coming along good", while in the middle of praising this horse it looks up and to the side and headbuts my dad in the nuts. He dropped to the floor like a sack of sh*t and his brother egged him on saying "are you going to take that from a horse". My dad sprung to his feet and punched the horse in the face. He also broke his hash while doing so. retard.
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1 Rispondi*says something at normal voice lrvel* Parents: Stop mumbling and speak louder and clearer! *says it twice as loud* Parents: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?? *Yells it* Parents: You're grounded for yelling at us.
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2 RisposteNecrobump
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2 RisposteMy dad hates gay marriage. His sister is a lesbian.
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8 RisposteMe:Mom I still feel sick. Mom: Ok let's go to the doctors. Me: Ok. *Goes to doctors* *Tests positive for strep* *Gets in car* Mom: It's all because of that damn laptop of yours! Me: My laptop has been broken for a year now...
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4 RisposteModificato da Juno: 10/14/2015 1:01:10 PMDad: "You need to speak up when necessary and stand up for yourself" *Speaks up when I think my dad is being unfair/unreasonable* Dad: "What the -blam!- did u just say u lil bich dont you know im king here you ignorant mother-blam!-er ur grounded" Our family is kind of dysfunctional because my dad is always acting like a tyrant. >.>
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4 RisposteModificato da USS Liberty: 10/27/2015 5:45:11 PM[i]My mother screamed "you are -blam!-ing crazy and I hate you!" I said "Crazy! Crazy!? I'll show you facking crazy! Ahhhhhh!" *slammed my face throught the door five times, blood streaming from my face, piece of wood stuck in my cheek* She hasn't called me crazy since.[/i]
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2 RisposteMy friend got in trouble for saying watermelon because his parents found it racist.
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1 Rispondi>be me >grow up with religious step father >can't eat before family prays >being savage I eat before we pray >step father starts to lecture >lecture is long >step father starts eating >still havnt prayed >step father notices >awkward silence
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Me: hey mom is it cool if i go to the movies with some friends? Mom: sure honey, when? Me: tomorrow, 5:30 is when it starts Mom: okay ill give you some money when tomorrow comes around *next day, playing xbox* Mom: get off that dang computer already! (She doesn't care to know the difference, its okay though) geez sometimes your so antisocial! Go out and do something outside of the house for once! Me: mom im playing with the same guys im going to the movies with in literally 2 hours!
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2 Risposte"Hey, get off those mindless games and watch some TV!" I think playing a game with my friends is less mindless than just staring at the TV.
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9 RisposteTake your pick: - Backhanded me down a flight of stairs because my tone was "disrespectful." - Tossed me off the deck so I landed on the charcoal grill. 2nd degree burns on 70% of my left arm - Made me play basketball for two hours, followed by practicing the clarinet for another one, with two broken fingers because they though I was trying to get out of it. - Attempted to give me a curfew (I was in my third year of college at the time) - Was told to dump my girlfriend because "she was only going to get fatter." - They told me they didn't like who I was - My father flew across the room to physically attack me after I refused to go to my room (I was 23 at the time) -my mother refused to give me a ride to the doctor, because she didn't believe I was sick enough. My father lectured me for an hour in the waiting room about learning to be a man and "gutting it out". I had a temp of 103, the flu, and massive infections in my ears, sinuses and chest.
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Necrobump
