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Edited by U10210056:
2/10/2017 3:02:09 AM
28
GET HER TO COME A 2ND TIME... NINJAS NOT ALLOWED
Having trouble getting a girl to come back over to your place for a second and even third? Make the first time comfortable and unforgettable. How do you do this you ask?
Clean your entire house/apartment. Every crease, crack, and crevice should be immaculate. Clean floors. Clean toilet/shower. Have baby wipes available. Don't light candles, it's cheesy. Air the place out with a couple open windows. Place intriguing books out in the open as well as your music collection for her to look through. This starts conversation. Don't put the TV on. Sit next to her, don't be awkward and sit on the other couch or chair. If you have a singular chair in your place, put something on the seat so she won't sit there. Stock plenty of food and drinks. And not cheap college kid food. Get a few different bottles of wine... and wine glasses. Have a Netflix account just in case she brings it up. Clean every piece of clothing you own to include your bed sheets and blanket. Have your bed made. Remove all of your immature posters you bought from Spencer's or hot topic.
List anymore tips you'd like to add below.
Too tired to keep going but keep it comfy and sophisticated
[spoiler]🖕🏻[/spoiler]
English
#Offtopic
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1 Reply[quote]List anymore tips you'd like to add below.[/quote] Just build a wooden effigy in her image and then set it aflame with the fires of your heart. . . . Do not use cheap wood. . . . Do not get the two mixed up and accidently set the wrong one on fire. . . . Do not fall in love with the wooden effigy. Gets 'em every time.
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Edited by zeeb: 2/14/2017 1:51:23 AMNo, no, no. This is how to do it: -Make sure everything in your apartment is Adidas themed -Make sure you have the finest vodka available -When she arrives, lead her to a preferred squatting location. -When she is settled in, whisper to her, "Хотите водки?" -If yes, begin romantic night. -If no, tell her to leave. The phrase "idi nahui cyka blyat" are highly recommended in this circumstance. -Oh, and don't forget the hardbass.
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12 RepliesWhat you mean no college food... Do you know how happy I'd be with a pizza (•-• )
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One shot, Mountain Dew, brush teeth. Good to go for the night
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Don't forget to usher any booty calls/-blam!- buddies off of the premises and call your mom at least an hour before.
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Was gonna make a witty sex joke. But after reading it out it didn't sound good.
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5 RepliesHide all your porn magazines
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Edited by AlliKAT: 2/11/2017 9:30:57 AM"Every crease, crack, and crevice should be immaculate" Great advice right there.
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1 ReplyDispose of the dead bodies
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Play some Melee 1v1s and absolutely end her stocks with hateful disrespect
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3 RepliesI guess I shouldn't assume anyone here even talks to women
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5 RepliesGreat tips. Now give some advice on how to get a girlfriend in the first place.
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You Ninjas have a sense of humor.
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3 RepliesNo I'm not gonna pretend to be something I'm not...If she doesn't like me for me -blam!- her... It's better to be up front right away than her find out later...And believe they WILL at some point see the real you...
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1 ReplyEdited by Apollo: 2/9/2017 11:54:57 PM[quote]ninjas not allowed[/quote] Yep, that will definitely draw suspicion away.
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1 ReplyHonestly, I'd like to see what the guy's place looks like BEFORE he prepared it. It'll tell me a lot about him 😛 Good advice tho, the cleanliness part is definitely a first for me. I don't want to have to bring a gas mask to our first date.
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3 RepliesEdited by Krishnas Prophet: 2/9/2017 9:32:44 PMPro tip: find a girl that doesn't care about all that French bullshit and happens to like your posters and junk food. Have marketplace paid for, in case she mentions it.
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4 RepliesFind a good hiding place for all of your caged children. [spoiler]You guys do that too, right?[/spoiler]
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Be confident, but don't be an ass.
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2 RepliesIt doesn't hurt to lift a little bit.
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Inb4 ninja reply
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1 ReplyYou forgot the most important thing.... Make sure your light-up sketchers are out and about.
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Edited by varvatos: 2/10/2017 12:42:47 AMStick a Micky mouse alarm clock in view somewhere in your room when the moment comes quick glance and your back ,you can last all night wth a Micky mouse clock.lol[spoiler]sorry I thought you meant come[/spoiler]
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-sigh- Fine i'll go. -takes samurai sword and ninja stars-
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Have a Hakenkreuz hanging from every wall.
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Leave a piece of toast and a pop tart in the toaster
