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Edited by o_____________o:
8/27/2014 1:03:31 PM
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What if Obama became the Speaker?
I was watching the o'rielly factor when an idea popped into my head. What if Barack Obama became the Speaker? How do you think this would affect the story? What changes do you think he would make? I want to hear what you think, but first I will list my guesses.
*Instead of fighting the darkness and protecting the city, he would call back all the guardians.
*he would attempt to apologize to Earth's enemies for the arrogance of the traveler.
*He would put a %60 tax on all guardians' glimmer and use it to fund his space golfing.
*Supers would be nerfed.
*He would secretly give weapons to bands of the Fallen in a special mission called "fast and fallen."
*revival would take 4 hours due to his new affordable traveler care act.
*Instead of helping you, he will give impressive speeches about how he helps you.
*Overwhelming evidence would support the suspicion that he wasn't born on Earth or even human, but he would provide fabricated proof to the contrary.
*he would let fallen into the city and refuse to tighten security around the walls.
*high ranking guardians would be penalized for their achievements.
*the hive would be referred to as the unified rebels.
*he would have the ghost say "that wizard came from Bush."
*the darkness would no longer be referred to as the darkness, but as twilight.
*he would attempt to disarm the traveler. His logic being that if we put down our weapons, the darkne...er...twilight will too.
*the guardians would be villainized by his cronies and supporters.
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There would be a lot of stuttering and the word "um" would be used quite frequently. haha
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This is a good thread
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Hahaha loved this
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1 ReplyI thought John Boehner was the Speaker. [spoiler]Just my bad political joke. Great post, OP![/spoiler]
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I would have to ask for a recount on that idea
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Edited by 27towels: 8/27/2014 8:40:31 PMNaah, Bill Nighy's better. Also this should be in #politics.
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gonna have to see his Birth Certifacate before hes elected Speaker...
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You forgot to mention that the Speaker's cutscenes would take twice as long, due to the fact that Obama chops up his lines worse than Capt. Kirk...
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And I was half expecting him to refer the Fallen as ISIS or pro russian rebels, lolz.
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Lol long face this was hilarious. Keep up the good work
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2 RepliesIsn't o'rielly a douche. And obama not that stupid (only by about a half).
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[quote]*the darkness would no longer be referred to as the darkness, but as twilight.[/quote]Nah, that name is copyrighted. He'd probably go with "Light-Deprived" or "Photophobe"
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Edited by ResidentRecon89: 8/27/2014 6:49:16 PMYou forgot one *after the Fallen infiltrate the last safe city on earth, instead of calling them the "fallen" he'll call them "undocumented creatures" :)
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19 Replies"I was watching the o'rielly factor...." [spoiler]walks out immediately[/spoiler]
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I cancel my pre order and buns all the destiny copies I see.
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If he became speaker I would join the fallen as their would be less chance of being shot by friendly fire.
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"Now uhLet me be clear! We'll probably survive the darkn-er-Twilight this time. And by we, I mean of course me"
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1 Replywhat's o'rielly factor?
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Obama Care, nahh Fallen Care would be in full force.
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3 RepliesIm british! Obama doesnt mean shit! Peter dinklage is king
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2 RepliesGuardians unable or unwilling to acquire more ammo would receive ammo stamps, siphoning ammo from all other guardians. Sadly, the percentage of ammo given will be greatest from guardians of levels 8 - 14.
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TL:DR, but I agree... what if...
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Edited by Der_Peevmeister: 8/27/2014 6:39:21 PMWhat if Boehner was the Speaker. He already is....
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I thought Obama was already booked to voice The Darkness.....
