All you smooth 'men' with your baby faces, all you whiny little snotnosed kids, all you women out there that are waiting for Bungie to add beards to the game so you can finally feel like real men: YOU DON'T DESERVE IT!
I've EARNED my beard, cultivated it, loved it, cared for it. I keep it clean and neat, and in return it grants me masculinity and more pussy than Charlie Sheen gets on a saturday night (He IS beardless, after all).
And now you just want to come on this game and just get a beard for free!? No. Beards are EARNED, not gotten for doing nothing.
All you hairless freeloaders will never understand: the true beard is on the INSIDE, and that can never be faked.
I salute the TRUE beards of Destiny. You are welcome in my fireteam at all times. Beard on!
*Edit* Yes, I do support Exo beards, as long as the player behind the beard is a true man!
Edit 2:
Here are the beard tiers:
Tier -1: Women and children. And beardless 'men'
Tier 0: Light stubble: open to all, even those of tier -1 so they can have a taste of the bearded life.
Tier 1: http://img3.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20131130154248/thor/images/a/a6/Chris-Hemsworth-2.jpg
Tier 2: http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_YHubNjdqtIE/TTUeAIeR8wI/AAAAAAAAI0M/Ed3GUuzkP4Q/s1600/brad+pitt+beard.jpg
Tier 3: http://usaswimming.org/_Rainbow/images/_Club%20Swimmers/Pascale-Beard.jpg
Tier 4: http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/5a/70/4d/5a704d42f0fb5d29bcc213cbd3ba57d5.jpg
Tier 5: http://www-images.theonering.org/torwp/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/gandalf-ianmckellen-p.jpg
Tier 6: http://cdn.instructables.com/FS9/HQP8/FMZADCXN/FS9HQP8FMZADCXN.LARGE.jpg
Edit 3: I say we need a seperate playlist as well: Vanguard Beard strikes! Level 30 strikes where droprates are upped.
Edit 4: new word! Beardsome. It means Awesome and handsome all in one package.
Edit 5: military personal is being oppressed! Beards are not allowed. Thus, everyone on the military (or in a profession where beards are oppressed) shall have access to up to Tier 2 beards.
Edit 6: for the people wondering: I myself am at Tier 3.
Edit: 7: We're trending! I bow my beard at you fine folks.
Edit 8: Seeing all of you reporting in, in all of your bearded glory, has warmed my heart and my beard. I love you, Guardians!
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Tier 3. Beard on fellow guardians. Beard on.
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I am working on my beard now it's coming along nicely
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I have bottles of oil my godly beard has secreated. I sell it to those less fortunate who can't grow one. Just apply twice a day.
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I'm stuck on tier 1.5, still waiting on the 'tash drop from the raid. Then again I didn't earn mine, I cheesed it using my razor nerf
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Ooh rah Marine Corps. Tier -1. Beards are unauthorized :/ Can't be a real man on active duty I guess... -blam-ed again.
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I can't bandage anything besides tier one. I've always wanted a Gandalf beard. Damn you, genetics!
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I can't grow a beard :(
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Weird, a whiny beard man, never thought I'd encounter that but I guess I should expect nothing less from hipster
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Close to tier 2, but my beard isn't beardly enough.. yet.
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Edited by Hatersaurus: 12/24/2014 4:44:57 PMI'm tier 4... Reporting for beardly details that have to do with manly stuff.
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#offtopic
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Tier 2 reporting for duty!
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Chin hair and a mustache.
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I'm between tier 1 and 2. Someday, 5...someday.
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Edited by general grewal: 12/24/2014 4:51:59 PMIm A tier 6 ask me anything
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Tier 1 present. Have to keep it classy for my job. I want to be a tier 2.
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Beards are dope. That is all.
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Tier 4 beard.
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We should make an attachment that is free to us bearded men, once you put your beard inside it will allow you to place beards on all your characters(even female.) This machine will have multiple failsafes. It will be able to detect fake beards and neck beards(not real beards) The funding for this wonderful machine will be covered in the yearly taxes of all non-bearded folk.
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Is a stuck on beard considered cheesing?
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Edited by D34N0000: 12/24/2014 8:11:00 PMHaha this is the funniest post and comments I've read on this site lol I myself have a tier 2 beard :)
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I wasnt going to post, but my beard did it for me. Tier2. Beard on.
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I'm in between tier 2 and 3 and still lvling up everyday.
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Is there a way to cheese tier 2? I'm in between stubble and tier 1, it's upsetting. I got a bad ass goatee though. Lol
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Tier one for life and while I respect your dedication to the bearded walk of life, bearded men have never appealed to me. Except for Idris Elba, he's on The List.
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Say my name.