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What's the difference between jam and jelly? [spoiler]I can't jelly my pen0r up ur ass.[/spoiler]
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Why are ducks so funny? [spoiler]Because they're always quacking jokes :D[/spoiler]
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I like my coffee like I like my slaves: [spoiler]Free[/spoiler]
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A baby seal walks into a club...
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Why was the navy captain walking around with a bunch of seamen? [spoiler]he put on the wrong socks[/spoiler]
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See you all in hell.
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Two cannibals were eating a clown and one turns to the other and says, "does this taste funny to you?"
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Your life [spoiler]OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH[/spoiler] [spoiler]jk [/spoiler]
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Don't trust the atoms. They make up everything.
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Edited by Oxbow: 8/20/2014 7:50:06 PMHow do you get a elephant in to the freezer? [spoiler]Open the freezer , put the elephant in, close the freezer[/spoiler] How do you put a giraffe in the freezer? [spoiler]Open the freezer, get the elephant out, put the giraffe in and close the freezer[/spoiler] The lion gives a party and every animal is invited. Who diden't come to the party? [spoiler]The giraffe because he's still in the freezer[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]#Destiny[/spoiler]
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What did the white Jew say to the black Jew? [spoiler]Excuse me, could you please move to the back to the oven?[/spoiler]
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What's long and black?
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Edited by Failure4Life: 8/21/2014 3:42:08 AMYour name.[spoiler] Because my name is infinitely better.[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]The humor here is so dark, it could pick cotton.[/spoiler] and another one What do you get when you crossbreed an octopus with an african-american? [spoiler]I don't know either, but it could pick an awful lot of cotton[/spoiler] See you in hell <3
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[spoiler]My girlfriend asked if I was a pedophile. I told her that was a really big word for someone her age[/spoiler]
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How many Feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? [spoiler]0, they can't change anything [/spoiler]
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Call of Duty Advanced Warfare.
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Hahaha no
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There's going to be a CoD movie... <.< >.> And it won't be directed by Michael Bay.
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your life.
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You're so ugly that when you were born, your mother says to your father "look at our sweet little treasure." Your father replies "yeah, now let's go bury it in the yard" Your momma is so fat, your father needed to follow the yellow brick road to freedom after they did the nasty What do you call 20 blondes lined up ear to ear? Wind tunnel. A brunette is jumping up and down in the middle of some train tracks shouting "22, 22, 22" and she's spotted by a blonde. The blonde being curious, joins her in jumping and shouting "22, 22, 22". A train sounds its horn, and the brunette leaves the blonde. Blonde gets hit, and the brunette enters the tracks to resume jumping, shouting "23, 23, 23"
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Edited by ikma: 8/20/2014 2:59:30 PMA new captain arrives to take command of a French foreign legion camp. His aide is showing him around, when the captain notices a camel tied out behind his tent. "Why is there a camel tied out behind my tent?" he asked. "Well sir," his assistant replied, "you see, the men are out here for so long without the company of women that - " "I see," the captain interjected. "You don't have to say any more." Several months went by, and though the captain tried to resist his temptations, he eventually gave in to his curiosity, went out back, and banged the camel. On his way back to the tent, he saw the aide staring at him. "Is that how the men do it?" he asked. "Well sir," the aide replied, "most men just ride the camel into town.
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What do you call a man floating in water with no arms or legs?[spoiler]Bob[/spoiler]
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#offtopic but did you guys hear about that kidnapping? [spoiler]He woke up[/spoiler]
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Why as at the end of a rainbow [spoiler][the letter w