These are actual comments made on students' report cards by teachers in the New York City public school system. All teachers were reprimanded (but, boy, are these funny!)
1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
2. I would not allow this student to breed.
3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.
4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together .
7. This child has been working with glue too much.
8 When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.
9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.
12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ShadowTeufel232 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Defiance117 [quote]PS: atleast their honest.[/quote]There is a difference between honest and power-trippingly-rude. Instead of saying some of those things, the teachers could have put "Student needs serious tutoring." or "These grades are alarmingly bad, and if we don't do something to correct this, this student will fail." and to zag.... [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SS_Zag1 Eh? People aren't hilariously rude in other countries?[/quote]Actually, in China, teachers are allowed to hit their students if they display enough disobedience. Even worse, if the teacher ends up calling the child's parents, they come to school the next day with bruises all over them. Some of the stuff Chinese parents do would be considered child abuse here in America, probably another reason why Asians have this stereotype of being extremely disciplined, and intelligent, and things of that nature..[/quote] You mean they have the "stereotype" of being the exact same way that children here in America were years ago, before all of the bleeding-heart PC idiots decided to start putting their two cents in?[/quote] Honestly, America as a whole has gone soft. No one can do anything without offending some sensitive moron. Bad kid + getting the -blam!- beat out of him = good kid. That's how it works, and if it doesn't work, why bother with the loser?
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[quote]Originally Posted By[b] Argus eyed[/b] 1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig. 9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming. 12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is definitely dead.[/quote]These are my favorites. Good finds, mate. [quote]Originally Posted By[b] Argus eyed[/b] 3. Your child has delusions of adequacy. 6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together . 10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.[/quote]I feel like I've heard these in Wierd Al songs before.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Defiance117 [quote]PS: atleast their honest.[/quote]There is a difference between honest and power-trippingly-rude. Instead of saying some of those things, the teachers could have put "Student needs serious tutoring." or "These grades are alarmingly bad, and if we don't do something to correct this, this student will fail." and to zag.... [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SS_Zag1 Eh? People aren't hilariously rude in other countries?[/quote]Actually, in China, teachers are allowed to hit their students if they display enough disobedience. Even worse, if the teacher ends up calling the child's parents, they come to school the next day with bruises all over them. Some of the stuff Chinese parents do would be considered child abuse here in America, probably another reason why Asians have this stereotype of being extremely disciplined, and intelligent, and things of that nature..[/quote] You mean they have the "stereotype" of being the exact same way that children here in America were years ago, before all of the bleeding-heart PC idiots decided to start putting their two cents in?
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those. are. awesome. -blam!-. comments. seriously. we should start our own and see how ridiculous we can make them. ya know...just make up a comment that sounds professional and add it to the list. ill start with a total cliche one: "Your child is a few fries, a burger and a drink short of a happy meal"
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I got my AP Biology teacher to put "Fails to perform concert music." on one of my Interim reports, she was going to but "Doesn't come prepared to gym" or something to that effect, but they removed that from the selected choices of comments.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Defiance117 [quote]PS: atleast their honest.[/quote]There is a difference between honest and power-trippingly-rude. Instead of saying some of those things, the teachers could have put "Student needs serious tutoring." or "These grades are alarmingly bad, and if we don't do something to correct this, this student will fail." and to zag.... [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SS_Zag1 Eh? People aren't hilariously rude in other countries?[/quote]Actually, in China, teachers are allowed to hit their students if they display enough disobedience. Even worse, if the teacher ends up calling the child's parents, they come to school the next day with bruises all over them. Some of the stuff Chinese parents do would be considered child abuse here in America, probably another reason why Asians have this stereotype of being extremely disciplined, and intelligent, and things of that nature..[/quote] Oh, boo-hoo. There is such as thing as "beyond help". Considering the amount of crap teachers have to put up with, I can totally understand them getting mad at completely incompetent students. Maybe you should look up the blog of a special education teacher who wrote under the pen name "Riti Sped", so you can see how screwed up some students placed in the mainstream education system (and their parents) really are.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] sentenashi Hahaha. Nice. They were probably those kids that just pratt around, smoke, take drugs etc. Good for the teachers I say![/quote]
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Lol, that must hurt.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Eight Oh 8 State [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] thisnameok [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] mooman1080 anouther reason why I go to private school[/quote]Your parents are rich?[/quote]Your parents don't need to be rich to go to a private school. I did.[/quote]wow, i was just making a joke based off of a stereotype i wasnt actually assuming that his parents were rich [Edited on 01.11.2008 7:18 PM PST]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Eight Oh 8 State [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] thisnameok [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] mooman1080 anouther reason why I go to private school[/quote]Your parents are rich?[/quote]Your parents don't need to be rich to go to a private school. I did.[/quote] Sure helps though.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] thisnameok [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] mooman1080 anouther reason why I go to private school[/quote]Your parents are rich?[/quote]Your parents don't need to be rich to go to a private school. I did.
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-blam!- these teachers.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] mooman1080 anouther reason why I go to private school[/quote]Your parents are rich?
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lol, I wish they still used it.
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[quote] 2. I would not allow this student to breed. 4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. 6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together . 8 When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell. 11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others. [/quote] The best five.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Argus eyed 4. Your son is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot. [/quote] LOL my favorite.
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anouther reason why I go to private school
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Argus eyed 1. Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig. 5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them. [/quote]When I had to make an autobiographical movie in high school, I interviewed my history teacher. These were among the things he said. Needless to say, he was awesome. I miss that guy...
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The comments in my school system are all preset leaving it up to the teacher to pick which one is most appropriate without being overly offensive. [Edited on 01.11.2008 11:02 AM PST]
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Defiance117 Actually, in China, teachers are allowed to hit their students if they display enough disobedience. [/quote] Haha! So they are hilariously rude in other countries. >_> Just as I thought.
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Wow these teachers sound like asses. If my teacher said that about me I would fill his or her desk with insects.
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[quote]PS: atleast their honest.[/quote]There is a difference between honest and power-trippingly-rude. Instead of saying some of those things, the teachers could have put "Student needs serious tutoring." or "These grades are alarmingly bad, and if we don't do something to correct this, this student will fail." and to zag.... [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SS_Zag1 Eh? People aren't hilariously rude in other countries?[/quote]Actually, in China, teachers are allowed to hit their students if they display enough disobedience. Even worse, if the teacher ends up calling the child's parents, they come to school the next day with bruises all over them. Some of the stuff Chinese parents do would be considered child abuse here in America, probably another reason why Asians have this stereotype of being extremely disciplined, and intelligent, and things of that nature..
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] SS_Zag1 "Dear Parent, Your student is freaking stupid. Love, Zag the Teacher"[/quote] Haha, made me laugh.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] The BS Police Only in America...[/quote] Eh? People aren't hilariously rude in other countries? [quote]PS: atleast their honest.[/quote] No kidding. I'd be a horrible teacher. "Dear Parent, Your student is freaking stupid. Love, Zag the Teacher"
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Only in America... PS: atleast their honest.