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8/18/2012 2:46:41 AM
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Joke Thread! Post your favorite jokes!
People never really tell jokes anymore, so I thought we may as well share the ones we know ^^
Can be anything from a knock-knock joke to a short story, anything goes as long as it's sfw! (Obviously) :D
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Knock Knock Who's Dar Boo Boo Who? BOO HOO HAHAHAHAHHAHAHH LOL ROFL LMAO
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A bar of gold walks into a bar. The bartender points at it and yells "Au, get out of here!" *Slaps knee, laughing hysterically*
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Goku: What's the difference between a jeweler and a jailer? one sells watches and the other watches cells.
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[url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZmMrd0RDMc]Your mom is so fat, her splash attack does damage.[/url] [Edited on 08.17.2012 8:32 PM PDT]
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How much ass do you think MegaMan gets? Seven asses.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] x Fr0sst BiTe x *bursts into the thread* Yo mama's so fat [b]and[/b] stupid, she saw a bus full of white kids and said,"Stop that moving twinkie!"[/quote] This is the best joke i have heard in a while.
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*bursts into the thread* Yo mama's so fat [b]and[/b] stupid, she saw a bus full of white kids and said,"Stop that moving twinkie!"
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RaZorRyaN [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] thescratchman17 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RaZorRyaN Your mamas so dumb she stole free samples. If you didn't like that one, then i got 6 more. [/quote] Your momma's so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed.[/quote] Your mama's so fat, when she went to in-and-out, she went in but she never went out. We should stop here before we rip out each others throats. [/quote] Alright, fine. Dayum shame, I know tons of these and I was itching for a chance to use 'em.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] thescratchman17 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RaZorRyaN Your mamas so dumb she stole free samples. If you didn't like that one, then i got 6 more. [/quote] Your momma's so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed.[/quote] Your mama's so fat, when she went to in-and-out, she went in but she never went out. We should stop here before we rip out each others throats.
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RaZorRyaN Your mamas so dumb she stole free samples. If you didn't like that one, then i got 6 more. [/quote] Your momma's so fat, she fell off both sides of the bed.
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Your mamas so dumb she stole free samples. If you didn't like that one, then i got 6 more.
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What do you call a dog in heat? A hotdog! [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_gFmnj2xQQ]:D[/url]
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[blondejoke]Whatdya call 3 blondes standing next to each other shoulder to shoulder? A wind tunnel.[/blondejoke]
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My Thai girlfriend says -blam!- size doesn't matter in a relationship. I still wish she didn't have one.
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So, Mike McQueary, Jerry Sandusky, and Joe Paterno are on a plane with a bunch of Second Mile kids when the aircraft suddenly careens out of control and begins to crash. Paterno yells out, "Here! There are three parachutes!" "What about the kids?!" replies McQueary. Paterno angrily retorts, "F**k the kids!" To this, Sandusky calmly asks: "Do we have enough time?" [Edited on 08.17.2012 7:11 PM PDT]
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the search bar
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What did the batman say after I broke his back? AAAA, My back!
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i was going to tell a original joke butt -blam!- it [Edited on 08.17.2012 7:00 PM PDT]
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Guy walks into his kitchen carrying a duck. He saunters up to his wife and says, "Well, this is the pig I've been f**ckin'." His wife says, "That's not a pig, that's a duck." The guy replies, "I wasn't talkin' to you!" [Edited on 08.17.2012 7:11 PM PDT]
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What did the robot say to the caterpillar? STOP BEING A CATERPILLAR!
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"You know how it's too hot to go to the sun?!" "You go at night!"
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Gaara444 Please post more, I needed to stitch up my sides with that last one. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Sgt monkey41 What's the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits until puberty to come on a kid's face. I got a million of these...[/quote][/quote] [url=http://www.slightlywarped.com/jokes/jokes/incredibly_offensive_jokes.htm]Have fun.[/url]
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So two guys walk into a bar. The first one says, "I'll have some H2O." The second one said, "I'll have some H2O too." The second one died shortly after.
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Please post more, I needed to stitch up my sides with that last one. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Sgt monkey41 What's the difference between a priest and acne? Acne waits until puberty to come on a kid's face. I got a million of these...[/quote] [Edited on 08.17.2012 6:52 PM PDT]
