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#Halo

2/23/2011 5:15:56 AM
111

The ONI Base is the most poorly designed office building in history.

You got four floors right? Now I mean, I guess in the year 2552 they think, "Oh elevators, I guess we won't use that anymore!" So what the hell do they do? 500 years in the future? They put air vents and yellow lifts. What the hell? What if I was carrying some coffee or something, I go up one of those things and, what do you know, my coffee goes all over the place. It spills on my shirt, my pants, that memo the boss needed, my briefcase, EVERYTHING! Why can't they just make some adjacent bridges? I don't understand this at all. OR JUST USE SOME GODDAMN ELEVATORS! Also, whats with the big gravity lift in the middle? It's almost as worse as the yellow lift. Say I need to get to the second floor, but the airvent is a piece of crap so I decide to use this thing. Plus I mean, my office is right there, what can go wrong? So I jump in it and I completely miss the bridge and fall and break my legs. What the hell is wrong with ONI? Is this the Olympics? Why does getting to the bridge need to be a game? Don't it's workers just sue the place? I mean coffee spills everywhere, you break your damn legs, I mean everything just goes wrong here. Also there's no chairs, what the hell? Do I have to stand up when I'm writing that big tax report? What a terrible building. [Edited on 02.22.2011 9:16 PM PST]
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#Halo #Reach

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] RC R3w1nd Sead Thraved[/quote] I think you meant "Thread Saved"

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  • Sead Thraved

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  • Haha, this made my day.

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  • The elevators of the future are powered by air. Unfortunately with the base under Covenant attack, lockdown protocols were activated and the elevators were stuck in up-only mode with the doors open. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] AlphaErock Should have put in escalators. [/quote]That's Orbital, right?

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  • Maybe those aren't meant to be airlifts. Those could be fax machines 500 years in the future.

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  • If you had a grunt bachelor party in your work place would it also look horrible?

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  • I agree with the OP. Horrid map. Should have put in escalators. [Edited on 03.03.2011 10:23 AM PST]

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] MRDNRA v2 [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ModestCobra7 wheres the red lift? also i loled through this whole thread. +all my internets[/quote] Red lift is hidden down a passage where in MP there's a DMR. It takes you to the top floor the opposite side of the map (and the other end of the map) from yellow lift. It is a relatively safe lift to use, as no one camps specifically at the lift due to lack of cover at the lift exit.[/quote] oh yeaaaahhh, i forgot all about that part.

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] blackandblutoo Haha, this post made my day. [/quote]

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  • The multiplayer version is a warzone. Play in Campaign, and you'll see some changes.

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  • You can walk all the way up... just get some damn exercise fatty.

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] ModestCobra7 wheres the red lift? also i loled through this whole thread. +all my internets[/quote] Red lift is hidden down a passage where in MP there's a DMR. It takes you to the top floor the opposite side of the map (and the other end of the map) from yellow lift. It is a relatively safe lift to use, as no one camps specifically at the lift due to lack of cover at the lift exit.

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  • wheres the red lift? also i loled through this whole thread. +all my internets

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  • Thread is awesome. So I saved it.

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  • [quote] Do you even know what a facade is? It's a fake...the entire building is a fake. Ever notice how the ONLY people/corpses you find in the building and surrounding areas in campaign, are only Marines? No researchers, no civilians, no workers? That's because they were never there. That's just my opinion though.[/quote] obviously the moment noble team saw covenant the first people off the planet where those of ONI

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  • Awesome thread. I'd come to work more if our building was fun like ONI!

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] tsujen Why would they be drinking coffee in 2555? [/quote] why not?

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  • There´s a good reason why they´re called 'ONI spooks'

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  • Hahaha, this post made my morning. Maybe they just don't have elivators in there [b]yet[/b]

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  • Even though this made me chuckle, you should be using the Campaign version of Sword Base rather than the MM one. The Campaign one had chairs and no lifts, and there was an elevator to get there.

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  • Clearly, this is a travesty. That's why the Covenant won. Office inefficiency is no laughing matter.

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  • I loled, but this really hurts to read. [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] FallenZodiac It's almost as worse as the yellow lift.[/quote] Please do better at english in the future.

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  • Posting in epic thread.

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  • The ramps are prob why Halsey chose to place her office in the basement.

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  • Why do all the good threads have to die?

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  • [quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Swift Drax I just don't see the joke. This thread was far from funny...just plain stupid IMO. I didn't even chuckle.[/quote] Then dont reply, just because you have no sense of humor does not mean you need to take everything literally

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