Stop forcing cross play by not finding matches without it. The default should be cross play off not on. I think if most players knew they could play without it they would. The lagging, incorrect match making just continues to get worse year after year.
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I know a lot of players claim that cross-platform makes a difference in the lag, but I personally think that is Confirmation Bias at work. I'm on Xbox, and it lags just as often when I play Xbox players as when I play Playstation or PC players