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12/18/2021 11:13:16 PM
21
how do i convince my gf to wash her beaver?
Ive been with this girl for about 3 years now and things are getting pretty serious between the two of us. she wants to move in with me, and i want to say yes, but shes got this beaver and its really hairy and smelly and toothy and i cant stand it. i tried to talk to her about it while on a date way back; looked her dead in the eye and said in a strong assertive voice: "your beaver smells like rotten salmon." but she just got all embarrassed and broke down in tears right in the middle of the restaurant.
I cant take it anymore, i love her i really do, but this beaver; its building a dam between us, and it reeks of salmon.
English
#Offtopic
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Gross, isn't there a tool for cleaning said hairy beast? Lather it in layers of Dawn soap, or else it gets left outside again!!!
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You could shave it I recommend some lotion so it doesn’t get razor burn.
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Maybe it's dry clean only.
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Welp not gonna lie I’m always straight forward with girls. I’m a “urban dude”. I would really just say your beaver stinks and I don’t want to live with it.
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Bribe her with candy.
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1 ReplyYou need to build it a pool in the backyard, so that it can bathe in the water while it builds its dam.... Plus make sure that there is enough wood for it to eat and grind down those teeth....
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You’ve GOT to be kidding.
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1 ReplyDo it yourself.
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2 Replies[b] [/b]
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4 RepliesCan we see a picture of her beaver . I didn't even think it was legal to own one.
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Dude love how many Primus fans there are in offtopica. This is a happy day
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1 ReplyPrimus moment
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Nice beaver!
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1 ReplyWell…I’ll take the opportunity to reference this anytime someone says beaver around me. I both do and don’t regret my choice.
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Get her this for christmas https://www.duluthtrading.com/mens-longtail-t-relaxed-fit-angry-beaver-logo-t-shirt-33241.html?dwvar_33241_color=BLK#lang=default&brandName=root&q=angry%2Bbeaver&start=2
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[b] [/b]
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MellloBreadweird gay girl - old
Idk man, aren’t beavers hair hydrophobic? -
Leave it to Beaver...
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Toothy
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Beaver? What do you mean bea- oooohhh. That's what you mean about the "beaver".
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Primus' joke but worse
