Don’t worry, I’m the same. My trick is I run towards another player, follow the red marker on the radar, and try to get just one before dying. That way I’m focused on something and don’t get as upset when my ass is handed to me. Like the scorch cannon mode, omg how I suck at that, and I hate it. But when I am focused on just one kill, it goes by faster and less stressful. There’s no rush anyhow, that sidearm isn’t very good so far. I don’t see myself using sidearms in NFS this season, GRs all the way. Take care fellow aging gamer.