“It looks like you have the last word”- Uldren
“No, I don’t”- You
Uldren looks at the Guardian genuinely confused.
“What?- Uldren
“I don’t have The Last Word. I heard it’s returning on Black Armory”- You
“Oh”- Uldren
“It would have made this moment a lot cooler”- You
“Indeed”- Uldren
“So, how do you want to die?”- You
“I can choose?”- Uldren
“Yeah, I have nothing else in mind. I was thinking Petra or me shooting you in the head while the screen fades to black, but that doesn’t seem so good. Would create too much speculation on the killer”- You
“Can I die out of old age?”- Uldren
“No”- You
“It was worth the shot. So, can I be killed by Cayde?”- Uldren
“I’m giving you the chance to choose. If you start to piss me off, I will kill you by having you play solo competitive”- You
“I know! I want to die because of a shot from the Malfeasance!”- Uldren
“No deal. That weapon is too rare. I have done 196 gambit matches and no luck. What about a shot from a The Ace of Spades?”- You
“Nah. An arrow from The Wish-Ender?”- Uldren
“I haven’t gotten it yet. Only on full curse weeks”- You
“One Thousand Voices?”- Uldren
“I’m starting to think you’re trying to trick me.”- You
“Of course I’m not! So, can I die out of a shot from...”- Uldren
He is interrupted by a chicken sound.
“What the hec...”- Uldren
“(Aggressive chicken sounds)”- Colonel
Colonel karate chops Uldren’s face, doing 1000000000000000000000 damage.
“Wow. Well, he is dead. What do we do now?”- You
“(Chicken sounds)”- Colonel
“Why am I talking to a chicken?”- You
“Because I can answer”- Colonel
“[b]WHAT?[/b]”- You
[i][u][b]ALTERNATE ENDING![/b][/u][/i]
“It looks like you have the last wor...”- Uldren
The Guardian shoots him
“Thank the Traveler! I have been waiting for 5 whole years to do this!”- You
Edit: Thanks for all of the upvotes people! I never thought that I would have so many on a post. I would like to point out that I have other posts with a similar structure to this one that you could check out.
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“Funny. The line between light and dark is so very thin. Do you know which side you’re on?” ... *gunshot* ... *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *gunshot* *stow* *shotgun pump* *blam* *blam* *blam* *blam* *blam* *blam*