Guessing your friends are still stuck in the pre-Forsaken version of Destiny then and haven't realized the changes on the leveling or gear acquisition.
It's all challlenge based now, no longer a token-fest. Random rolls are back, and difficult content exists (instead of everyone just spamming public events to max).
But I wouldn't suggest buying/pre-ordering anything from this franchise knowing your mindset on what you want. You're better off with games like ESO.
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See that's the thing. I want to love destiny. There's so much good.
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That's like a battered and abused spouse wanting to love the person that beats them because they have "good in them" despite knowing they aren't right for eachother.