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originally posted in:Terror Britannia
Edited by Syndicate Bias: 9/25/2015 1:11:12 AM
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A Path out of The Darkness Part One by Ripperjack797(Salty Jack)

Hi everyone I am making a story that just sparked into me tonight, like this if you enjoyed it and hopefully I can continue working on the next part tomorrow guys, please give me your honest opinions about it as I will be making several parts for it and of course compile a massive book of them as I go along...let me know in the comments below^^ A path out of the Darkness by Ripperjack797(Salty Jack) Over these last few days I have been dreading about it for so long.....that...beast of a weapon the Dark Soul is....I have been searching for it for such a long time and it wasn't up until now that I heard recent sightings of it.....I am scared, frightened by the power this weapon can hold against us....many of us have never fought a god by ourselves, in fact none of us really has been able to defeat one without help....however there is tales of a guardian....a guardian who became a champion among us.....his name is widely known across the stars....even Oryx himself cowers upon his name....many of us know him as our hero....our saviour...but before we say his name let me tell you a story about this hunter my friends..... ---Reaver It began on a cold, dark and deserted landscape forgotten in the centuries of war and famine.....the sight looks dreary and haunted as you may find many corpses and long lost souls that were taken away by the darkness.....for a time there was nothing but loneliness and bitter cold....until one dark and haunted winter....a spark of life appeared, hovering above the field of a massive and dark snowstorm....searching for the one champion that had slain the first gods of the darkness before....there the little light searched on years on end passing through dangerous caverns, hollow grounds filled with corpses and broken machinery from the golden age....finally after years of looking for him, the little light found his essence on a mound in the middle of a death engulfed field where the last battle was fought against the Fallen to prevent them from getting into the city....there laid the spark of the hunter and....the darkness of the bleeding god that slew him....the little ghost manoeuvred over his essence cautiously as he drew closer knowing full well about the stories of the lost ghosts that have been hunted and taken away by the night spawns...finally he little light drew close enough to convert what remained of the fallen saviour into light...however as soon as he started to revive him, he heard whispers...the little light started working harder as these whispers were getting closer and closer...."gives us your light, gives us your hopes for nothing will ever be the same" he heard from one of these whispers....finally they stopped....the light that has been resting for so long finally awoke and a new life started as the light slowly focused its power to shape itself into the form of a human being....it was bright, too bright and this alerted the ghost but he hovered next to it to defend it as the whisper began again and a faint growl was heard...finally the light died down and a man, laid there, weakened from his long sleep and pale as snow, his long dark hair reached past his shoulders, as he slowly regained control of his body he started to remove he hair off his face as ghost hovered there looking at him as he unfolded his hair and two bright blue eyes filled with fear and anger looked right at him as he stood up and slowly regained conscious....this was the first time in ages that this guardian has seen the light...so long has he been in that dreadful field of forgotten souls....and now he's once again reborn...looking past the storm there awaited a cast of shadows that moved swiftly behind the wall of snow and darkness of the storm...there awaited the shadow that has been looking for him as well..."come closer" he whispered to the guardian as he stood there looking straight into his eyes....the little light quickly made a weapon in the hands of this hunter as the dark figure moved ever so closely towards him...the guardian finally regained his conscious...he dashed for the shadow hidden in that storm....as he moved closer as the shadow disappeared and vanished from sight....the hunter stopped to gather his senses as he looked past the wall of darkness and into the bright lighthouse that laid ahead of the forgotten field....his ghost followed him as he moved closer in the shadow’s tracks to move towards the hidden path to the city...as they traveled, his face grew paler, and he grew weaker as he stumbled across this endless field of corpses, his ghost would create endless thermal fields for him to warm up in…the ghost scanned their surroundings as they moved closer to the steps of this deserted and heavily damaged lighthouse....finally after hours of walking through that death engulfed field…he reached it, and there he was...standing in front of what seemed to be the once great and majestic building, as a few pieces of it felled apart and the last shards of glass of it had been replaced with frozen blood of those who fell.....looking at it as it seemed to hold some sort of meaning to him, as he stood there he felt a shock through his body, he started to lose his vision...he started to lose all feelings and suddenly his world turned black....he regained his vision one last time as he was struggling to fight the exhaustion....he saw a dark figure moving closer to his weakened body...soon the figure was standing in front of him as he crawled away from her..."let me show you the path" the figure whispered, as she drew her shadowy hand to him, he looked up at it in terror as he laid defenseless and his vision started to fail again and this time he could not fight it....his body laid in the dark infested winter of the cosmodrome....
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  • Edited by Sidge: 9/26/2015 6:56:39 AM
    [quote] A path out of the Darkness by Ripperjack797(Salty Jack) Over these last few days I have been dreading about it for so long.....that...beast of a weapon the Dark Soul is....I have been searching for it for such a long time and it wasn't up until now that I heard recent sightings of it.....I am scared, frightened by the power this weapon can hold against us....many of us have never fought a god by ourselves, in fact none of us really has been able to defeat one without help....however there is tales of a guardian....a guardian who became a champion among us.....his name is widely known across the stars....even Oryx himself cowers upon his name....many of us know him as our hero....our saviour...but before we say his name let me tell you a story about this hunter my friends..... ---Reaver It began on a cold, dark and deserted landscape forgotten in the centuries of war and famine.....the sight looks dreary and haunted as you may find many corpses and long lost souls that were taken away by the darkness.....for a time there was nothing but loneliness and bitter cold....until one dark and haunted winter....a spark of life appeared, hovering above the field of a massive and dark snowstorm....searching for the one champion that had slain the first gods of the darkness before....there the little light searched on years on end passing through dangerous caverns, hollow grounds filled with corpses and broken machinery from the golden age....finally after years of looking for him, the little light found his essence on a mound in the middle of a death engulfed field where the last battle was fought against the Fallen to prevent them from getting into the city....there laid the spark of the hunter and....the darkness of the bleeding god that slew him....the little ghost manoeuvred over his essence cautiously as he drew closer knowing full well about the stories of the lost ghosts that have been hunted and taken away by the night spawns...finally [b]he little light[/b] drew close enough to convert what remained of the fallen saviour into light...however as soon as he started to revive him, he heard whispers...the little light started working harder as these whispers were getting closer and closer...."gives us your light, gives us your hopes for nothing will ever be the same" he heard from one of these whispers....finally they stopped....the light that has been resting for so long finally awoke and a new life started as the light slowly focused its power to shape itself into the form of a human being....it was bright, too bright and this alerted the ghost but he hovered next to it to defend it as the whisper began again and a faint growl was heard...finally the light died down and a man, laid there, weakened from his long sleep and pale as snow, his long dark hair reached past his shoulders, as he slowly regained control of his body he started to remove he hair off his face as [i][the][/i] ghost hovered there looking at him as he unfolded his hair and two bright blue eyes filled with fear and anger looked right at him as he stood up and slowly regained conscious....this was the first time in ages that this guardian has seen the light...so long has he been in that dreadful field of forgotten souls....and now he's once again reborn...looking past the storm there awaited a cast of shadows that moved swiftly behind the wall of snow and darkness of the storm...there awaited the shadow that has been looking for him as well..."come closer" he whispered to the guardian as he stood there looking straight into his eyes....the little light quickly made a weapon in the hands of this hunter as the dark figure moved ever so closely towards him...the guardian finally regained his conscious...he dashed for the shadow hidden in that storm....as he moved closer as the shadow disappeared and vanished from sight....the hunter stopped to gather his senses as he looked past the wall of darkness and into the bright lighthouse that laid ahead of the forgotten field....his ghost followed him as he moved closer in the shadow’s tracks to move towards the hidden path to the city...as they traveled, his face grew paler, and he grew weaker as he stumbled across this endless field of corpses, his ghost would create endless thermal fields for him to warm up in…the ghost scanned their surroundings as they moved closer to the steps of this deserted and heavily damaged lighthouse....finally after hours of walking through that death engulfed field…he reached it, and there he was...standing in front of what seemed to be the once great and majestic building, as a few pieces of it [u]felled[/u] apart and the last shards of glass of had been replaced with frozen blood of those who fell.....looking at it as it seemed to hold some sort of meaning to him, as he stood there he felt a shock through his body, he started to lose his vision...he started to lose all feelings and suddenly his world turned black....he regained his vision one last time as he was struggling to fight the exhaustion....he saw a dark figure moving closer to his weakened body...soon the figure was standing in front of him as he crawled away from her..."let me show you the path" the figure whispered, as she drew her shadowy hand to him, he looked up at it in terror as he laid defenseless and his vision started to fail again and this time he could not fight it....his body laid in the dark infested winter of the cosmodrome....[/quote] Amazing however small typo, you said he little light instead of the little light at the highlighted point. Otherwise super good! PS. Bit too much elipses PPS. I have done some corrections, bold means typo italic means I added something and underline means check grammar or spelling

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