[quote]Twas the night before 4/20, and all through the crib, not a creature was stirring, not even - did you hear something?
I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts from the gym
I’d just settled down to watch Adult Swim.
The bowls were all packed and the vapes with great care
In the hopes that Willie Nelson soon would be there
When from out in the yard came a crash and grew bellow
Whatever it was it was harassing my mellow
And what to my wandering eyes should appear?
It was a tall circus clown molesting a deer
(No, wait, just a tree)
I'd made a mistake, I guess I should mention
I was thoroughly baked
Then out of the shadows I saw it myself
It was Willie Nelson and Snoop, his jolly old elf
And a man who was grinning and wearing a hoodie
I knew in an instant it was good old St. Woody
I knew by their manner and the lovely aroma that they’d all brought me something to cure my glaucoma
And I heard them exclaim as the light bathed them dimly
‘Bill, you -blam!-in’ stoner, let us in - you don’t have a chimney!'
We lit up a joint and ate a pot brownie and soon we're as high as a young Robert Downey
When out on the lawn I heard such a crash
I ran to the toilet to flush all our stash
I looked out the peephole and what did I spot?
The chief of police and eight hungry cops
And then in a twinkling' I heard overhead
A fully-armed SWAT team, I thought we were dead
Then in they all flew, like geese through a fog
They barked out commands and shot my poor dog
(But he'll be OK)
They were after a pothead who matched my description
But I reached in my pocket and pulled out my prescription
They looked at it closely, they began to whine and to grouse
But they knew they had nothing, so I said, "Get out of my house!”
I said you don't have a warrant, you don't have writ
Happy 4/20 to all and to all some good shit
[/quote] -Bill Maher
Edit: Since this isn't trending, I unedited the previous edit.
English
#Offtopic
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I laughed I cried I blazed
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*Applauses*
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[b]Claps[/b]
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Necro bump
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Reading this before bed. Perfect way to end the day.
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I'm reading this at 3am
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4/19 is my birthday and nobody cares because 4/20 is more important than me apparently :(
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Robert Downey jr party made me piss my pants
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FUСK HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY!
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[quote] Edit: Why is this still trending?[/quote] Coz every day is 4/20!
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[quote][quote]Twas the night before 4/20, and all through the crib, not a creature was stirring, not even - did you hear something? I was wearing a t-shirt and shorts from the gym I’d just settled down to watch Adult Swim. The bowls were all packed and the vapes with great care In the hopes that Willie Nelson soon would be there When from out in the yard came a crash and grew bellow Whatever it was it was harassing my mellow And what to my wandering eyes should appear? It was a tall circus clown molesting a deer (No, wait, just a tree) I'd made a mistake, I guess I should mention I was thoroughly baked Then out of the shadows I saw it myself It was Willie Nelson and Snoop, his jolly old elf And a man who was grinning and wearing a hoodie I knew in an instant it was good old St. Woody I knew by their manner and the lovely aroma that they’d all brought me something to cure my glaucoma And I heard them exclaim as the light bathed them dimly ‘Bill, you -blam!-in’ stoner, let us in - you don’t have a chimney!' We lit up a joint and ate a pot brownie and soon we're as high as a young Robert Downey When out on the lawn I heard such a crash I ran to the toilet to flush all our stash I looked out the peephole and what did I spot? The chief of police and eight hungry cops And then in a twinkling' I heard overhead A fully-armed SWAT team, I thought we were dead Then in they all flew, like geese through a fog They barked out commands and shot my poor dog (But he'll be OK) They were after a pothead who matched my description But I reached in my pocket and pulled out my prescription They looked at it closely, they began to whine and to grouse But they knew they had nothing, so I said, "Get out of my house!” I said you don't have a warrant, you don't have writ Happy 4/20 to all and to all some good shit [/quote] -Bill Maher Edit: Why is this still trending?[/quote]
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Kek this made my day
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[quote]it was a tall circus clown molesting a dear[/quote]
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4/21 is surprise drug test day.
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Edited by DÆÑ łę ÇÅPTÄĮŃ: 5/17/2015 10:27:27 PMAlso hitler bday[spoiler]heil hitler[/spoiler]
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Is there a source somewhere for this?
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[quote]Happy 4/20 to all and to all some good shit[/quote] I died.
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Omfg I need a new set of lungs after reading this lol
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Spent the night before 420 smoking and playing skyrim on my PC... Then midnight hit so I figured to be in spirit might as well have another 2 hr smoke session..... Slept like I was on clouds last night : )
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[i]Establishing connection.....[/i] You humans and your drugs...To make yourself in heaven because of the hellish world around you. [i]End transmission[/i]
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"It was a tall circus clown, molesting a deer"
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420 blaze it skope
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That was beautiful.
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I still love this
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This made me laugh so hard.