[b]WARNING! This story contains innuendoes that may be offensive to some people! If you are sensitive to foul language, don't read![/b] Hank the Shank There once was a Shank. His name was Hank. A lot of bitches were stank. One day he floated on down to the Cosmodrome to pick up some robotic hoes. He scouted the perimeter for some basic bitches. But then he saw...her...er...i mean it (Because it is a robot) A gorgeous quad cogged baby exo. She...it was a real beauty. Despite the fact that hank was a shank with no facial features he blushed :$ . He cautously floated towards her. He practiced a few pick up lines a dreg taught him. "Hey girl, Hive seen you around these here parts and I've Fallen for you. Want to have some Vex while you suck my HardLight and play with my Caballs?" Her expression was disgusted. Hank became sad. He just wanted some Exo puhh. Hank wasn't going to give up. He tried another one.. "If I was Mars and you were Venus. Id travel through time and poke you with my penis." She gave Hank the same stank ass look. Hank wasnt getting any puhh that day. He slowly floated back to the Fallen Ketch to rethink his life. As he floated around Randal the Vandals came up to poke fun at him. "Hey Hank, yer an fagit" Hank didnt have to take this. He clenched his gears. "I've had a shitty day so if you'll be so kind as to get out of my way. It would be appreciated!" Hank said with a tude. The vandal looked shocked asf. "Woah man, I don't want no trouble". And he ran away. Hank floated to his room. He fell asleep. The next day.. Hank woke up meaning business. He was going to get some puhh today. He floated on over to the Skywatch. Inside he saw a true beauty. She was gorgeous <3 Omnigul. Juices spewed out from his engine. He thought of another pick up line. "Girl are you Crota's end. Cuz I want to traverse your abyss." Omnigul looked horrifying. Sorry typo..horrified. Hank had had enough. He floated up to Omniguls face. "Bitch", he started,"you are going to give me some of your crusty cobb webbed puhh right now." "Darling I will make you sing a Deathsingers song after I touch your Necrochasm." She let out a sexual shriek....Well at least I think it was sexual. She pulled down her dress revealing grey, crusty, rusty, icky sticky, smelly legs. Hank spewed juices even more. He thought he was going to rust. She lifted her legs. Hank saw cobb webbs and dried blood inside her puhh. Hank floated towards that shit. He stuck his circuits inside. That dried blood became moist asf. She screamed. "Shh baby gurl its ok. Just whisper my name.. She screamed again. "Baby gurl I dont think you understand. I said whisper." Shank said. "Lets try again..whisper now". She began to shriek a loud shriek Hank was upeset. He was finally getting that puhh but she wouldn't cooperate. "Baby gurl, you really gonna do me like this Baby Gurl?" She shrieked once more. Hank was done with her shite. He pulled out of that shit and shot Omnigul with a arc blast. She screamed as she disintegrated. All of the Fallen in the area suddenly respected Hank. "Hank killed Omigul what makes us any different" they said. Hank became the leader of the galaxy and became a world renowned dentist who fixed up people with busted ass grills. The End SPINOFF: Randal the Vandal Randal the Vandal was a very popular guy. He had tons of bitches on his d*** all the time. One day, he rolled up to the squad and said Hi, just like any other day. The only thing different was the fact that they ignored him. Hi, he said again. This time, they all turned and looked at him. "What are you doing here," one of them said. Another said "Haven't you heard, you've been replaced." The squad member turned and pointed toward a vandal named scandal. Super sad and mad, Randal went back to the Ketch. "I know," he said. "I'll go see my good ol friend hank. Hank was a shank. Hank had always been jealous of all the puhh Randal got, but hank and Randal had always been good friends. Randal saw Hank chilling in the main lobby. Jokingly, Randal said "Hey Hank, it an fegit!" Hank turned and said "I've had a shitty day so if you'll be so kind as to get out of my way, it would be greatly appreciated!" Randal was shocked asf and said "Woah man, I don't want no trouble," and ran off Randal was confused. Why had his best friend been so mean. Randal got angry. He rolled up to his old squad. "HEY -blam!-ERS" he yelled. He beat the sh*t out of all the fegits. The next day, Hank called Randal to apologize. Hank also told Randal that he had become a world renowned dentist. Hank told Randal that he had about 5 people come in with fuked up grills. That's how Randal the Vandal got his rep back. Within a week, he was back to -blam!-ing all the bitches in the Cosmodrome