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9/9/2008 12:55:30 AM
2248
What do YOU do to telemarketers? ACTUAL TELEMARKETER STORY AVAILABLE!!
i pretend im 6 and i claim to believe they are my grandma!
and if she asks where my parents are, i tell them they in the bedroom playing the drums
now you dont even have to have done this, just come up with great ways to do it
EDIT: I missed it a while ago.... BUT 2000 REPLIES!!!!!! WOOO!!
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[b][EDIT][/b]
[i] This post can be found on the 89th page.[/i]
WOOOO!!!! I finally actually got a telemarketer to call me in ages! Here's the story:
A guy with a very strong east indian accent called and my senses kicked in immediately. He offered to do a free estimate for new gutters on my house, (my gutters are brand spanking new so I wasn't losing anything) so I told him that I needed to make sure that the gutters would stay sturdy if at least 150 pounds were hung off of them because the neighbors kids use my gutters to hang off of to sneak out of their house and they are always breaking. After some explaining and interrupting his sales pitch, he finally spoke to a manager and told me that it would hold the weight. ( I doubt it )
The guy spent twenty minutes and started getting aggravated with me trying to tell me that an expert would be at my house tomorrow to give me an estimate, but I kept telling him that I would like to come in and take a look at the gutters to see them hold the weight because I was busy with the court system going through a divorce (he thought I was my dad so.....) so I wouldn't be home much and it would be a waste of my time had the estimator come and told me "-blam!- no, it can't hold that." (and also see that my house isn't actually broken)
So the guy spent a good two minutes trying to convince me to let the guy come give me an estimate, all the while I kept telling him: "Look, there is no point in giving me an estimate if I don't see that it can hold 150 pounds! The rest of the gutters are brand new! it's just the once part that keeps breaking! I don't care how much it costs, I would just like to come in and see if it can hold the weight I need it to hold. There is no point for me to get your gutters if they are going to break again next week! I need to see them successfully hold 150 pounds first before anything else!"
that lasted for about 10 minutes. When he finally got the idea that I wanted to come see their gutters demonstrated, I was telling them that they were wasting my time with this and that I'll stick to what I can see in the stores. I could very much hear the agony in his hard to understand accent when he told me, "ok sir, thank you and sorry for your time."
[Edited on 07.20.2011 3:47 PM PDT]
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I usually insult them based on whatever stereotype of their accent comes to mind.
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How would you know who is calling you lol...? Unless they are calling you on a Mobile which they generally do not. But I tell them "sorry not interested" and if they still persist I get a little smart with them :P.
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Try to sell them a ridiculous product, if they actually want to buy it, well screw around with them, and shipping to India is a pain in the ass.
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Deleted. [Edited on 08.08.2009 2:30 PM PDT]
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I try to sell then veggies
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Lmao one time i told a guy that was a telemarketer he was sexy and he hung up. I am a dude also :o
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] xBadgerKing1x i have another idea, TM "Hello sir or madam, we would like to tell you about our-" ME: "Can you wait for a few seconds?" (if they dont say yes argue with them untill they do) TM: "Ummmm okay." *Play sex noises* (After a few minutes) Me: Whew! Man im tired. Now what were you saying?" *TM hangs up* (if they dont, hang up on them) >=) [/quote] Me: Wait, don't hang up! Got a cigarette?
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I tell them to speak to my "representative and accountant" and then give them the number of my friend's cells or the suicide hot line or this pizza place near my house or some crap like that.
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i say hello this is the kool-aid company and they hang up cuz they actually believe me
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i have another idea, TM "Hello sir or madam, we would like to tell you about our-" ME: "Can you wait for a few seconds?" (if they dont say yes argue with them untill they do) TM: "Ummmm okay." *Play sex noises* (After a few minutes) Me: Whew! Man im tired. Now what were you saying?" *TM hangs up* (if they dont, hang up on them) >=) [Edited on 06.20.2009 6:35 PM PDT]
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I scream into the phone "I DONT WANT ANY OF YOUR PRODUCTS!!!" or sometimes i just hang up on them.
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[quote] Posted By:TheScriptKeeper I sold a 4 year Subscription to Playboy to a 75 year old woman LOL.[/quote] Uh...funny, or really messed up?
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[quote][b]Posted by:[/b] Sonic343 I can do a John F. Kennedy accent. lulz ensured.[/quote] "Ask not what your country can buy from you ask what you can buy for your country"
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TM: Hello, I- Me: Ya, is this(random sex line)? TM: Um, no. Me: S**t. I popped a whole bottle a viagra for nothing. TM: Sir, you took a whole bottle of pills? You should see a doctor. Me: No, don't call a doctor. TM: Well, what do you want me to do? Me: Tell me what you're wearing. *TM hangs up*
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Ask if he got his parents permission to use the phone, then go make some food and moan while you eat it next to the phone.
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[url=http://www.identafone.com/10ways.html]There used to be an entire three page article on this. This is the closest I could find to it.[/url]
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I try to make them cry.
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Well when I lived in the United States, I made my accent so thick, they couldn't understand a word I was saying. "Hello sir, would you like to sign up for a program to help improve your insurance?" "I zink zat zee 'ployer 'vill 'not 'e 'py 'to 'ee 'u ow." "Um...sir?" "DO NOT TALK OT ME ZAT WAY U TUPID AMEEEERICAN" That, or I just speak French. Incredibly fast.
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I just wanna tell you how I'm feelin, gotta make you understand, never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down...
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pretend they are calling military recruiting center, or a police station.....get's them to hang up really quick. EXAMPLE: "Yes, this is Sgt. Bilko, U.S. Army, How may I help you?"
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HIM:*Asks for Mr.[my last name]* me:" May I ask what it is for?" HIM:*Tells me what he is selling* ME:(as he is describing everything) "I LIKE -blam!-!" *hangs up* (it said I like male reproductive organ)
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i say in a muffled, girly voice... "Chicken tenders, *moan* sweet sauce....all over my body.
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I do the joke from Seinfeld. "* Seinfeld (to telemarketer): I can't talk right now. Why don't you give me your home number, and I'll call you back later. * Telemarketer: I'm afraid we can't do that. * Seinfeld: Oh, I guess you don't want people calling you and bugging you at home. * Telemarketer: Right. * Seinfeld: Well now you know how I feel. " Or just pretend to be an old grandma or something. "Hello? Timmy is that you?" Hilarious...
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What I usually do is start a big, long conversation with them, convincing them that I will buy something, and then about 15 minutes later I say will say: I don't want to buy anything, why would I in the first place. After this I just hang up wasting their time.
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I just simply scream and fire a couple gun shots.That usually scares them off. Lol.
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I tell them they better sleep with their eyes open Or I pretend to be a telemarketer myself.
