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9/9/2008 12:55:30 AM
2248
What do YOU do to telemarketers? ACTUAL TELEMARKETER STORY AVAILABLE!!
i pretend im 6 and i claim to believe they are my grandma!
and if she asks where my parents are, i tell them they in the bedroom playing the drums
now you dont even have to have done this, just come up with great ways to do it
EDIT: I missed it a while ago.... BUT 2000 REPLIES!!!!!! WOOO!!
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[b][EDIT][/b]
[i] This post can be found on the 89th page.[/i]
WOOOO!!!! I finally actually got a telemarketer to call me in ages! Here's the story:
A guy with a very strong east indian accent called and my senses kicked in immediately. He offered to do a free estimate for new gutters on my house, (my gutters are brand spanking new so I wasn't losing anything) so I told him that I needed to make sure that the gutters would stay sturdy if at least 150 pounds were hung off of them because the neighbors kids use my gutters to hang off of to sneak out of their house and they are always breaking. After some explaining and interrupting his sales pitch, he finally spoke to a manager and told me that it would hold the weight. ( I doubt it )
The guy spent twenty minutes and started getting aggravated with me trying to tell me that an expert would be at my house tomorrow to give me an estimate, but I kept telling him that I would like to come in and take a look at the gutters to see them hold the weight because I was busy with the court system going through a divorce (he thought I was my dad so.....) so I wouldn't be home much and it would be a waste of my time had the estimator come and told me "-blam!- no, it can't hold that." (and also see that my house isn't actually broken)
So the guy spent a good two minutes trying to convince me to let the guy come give me an estimate, all the while I kept telling him: "Look, there is no point in giving me an estimate if I don't see that it can hold 150 pounds! The rest of the gutters are brand new! it's just the once part that keeps breaking! I don't care how much it costs, I would just like to come in and see if it can hold the weight I need it to hold. There is no point for me to get your gutters if they are going to break again next week! I need to see them successfully hold 150 pounds first before anything else!"
that lasted for about 10 minutes. When he finally got the idea that I wanted to come see their gutters demonstrated, I was telling them that they were wasting my time with this and that I'll stick to what I can see in the stores. I could very much hear the agony in his hard to understand accent when he told me, "ok sir, thank you and sorry for your time."
[Edited on 07.20.2011 3:47 PM PDT]
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Act offended whenever they ask me a question. "Would you like to donate to *political party*" Whats that supposed to Mean! "Well I was just wondering" Oh I no what you were wondering, Perv! *hangs up*
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I always say yes to everything. Or say Muhammeds Toilet Cleaning, or Mc. Spanky's Beef Market, how may I help you.
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I turn it around on them and try to sell them their product.
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Well what i do is pick up the phone and sream at the top of my lungs.
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i Wish i could tell a telemarketer off but i have a cell phone and i would give my phone out but then they might charge my number or they might send me texts (idk surverys might) So god know the consequences of the internet having my phone numba
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"you dont got no pancake mix!!" hang up
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fart into the phone. or I might start saying random stuff like "no, Timmy, keep that banana out of your ass, I need that for lunch!" or "how would I know where your -blam!- outfit is?" not directly into the phone so it sounds like some weird -blam!- is going down
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I try to sell them something.
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*answers phone* Randy's Roadkill, you kill em we grill em.
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I tell them that i don't speak swedish. (because i'm from sweden and so all the telemarketers do aswell) Then i change between spanish learned at school and english talking about why i might consider buying whatever they are selling. And then i change my mind and say I just wanted to talk with someone.
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I pretend to put them on hold and start singing Summer of '69 or.,.. Me: Oh god thank you! I told my self if nobody called me in the next 24 hours I would kill myself! Them: actually I'm calling to sell you- Me: *fire gun out window* Friend: Oh god he actually did it! *Friend hangs up*
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I sing to them.
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I CALL them and ask them out :)
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I normally say 'what' then hang up.
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Say "this call is being recorded for quality assurance purposes". Then ask if they except stolen credit cards.
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I sing this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ryd2tcRlpKg&feature=related
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Act like im high and say that my grandparents are stuck to the celing and if i dont get them down in 48 minutes south korea will sink into the ocean and become neghbors with atlantis
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I ask them random questions whose answers aren't even correct...
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T: Can I speak with ____ Me: NO! T: What the- *hangs up*
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"hi you reached the first segregated church of Lucifer,hail the dark lords power. how can i help you?" or as soon as i answer "Would you like to talk about jesus?" i'm so versitile...
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i laugh at them
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(didnt read all of it, dont know if this has been said...) Telemarketer: hello, is this mr [insert name]... You: yeah i'd like a large, deep pan and hawaian pizza and a medium supreme without the mushrooms please. Telemarketer: um, no im calling to... (interupts) you: that'll be cash, not check and i live at [insert fake house adress], if its not here in under 30 minutes, i aint paying. (hang up)
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I pretend i'm a grunt.
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star making grunting sounds goin "oh yeah" and "sum more"
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I ask them if they have double glazing fitted in [i] their [/i] call centre.
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when i answer the phone and say hello they ask if i can speack to your parents i say can i speack to yours Or if im playing a game with people dying or when the dragon in dragon age orgins is roaring i put the phone up to the speakers
