Hunter:
You are a Hunter. Brash and flashy. You saw this class and it gave you a bountyhunter-y feel. You obsess over your hood and you would be pissed if your melee didn't involve a knife. You're either dead silent or too damn loud. There's a 60% chance your character is a female because you might be a little sexually confused, but you don't tell anyone that. You insist their hit box is smaller than the male body type as an excuse. You often jump into a horde of enemies with knife drawn, only to be revived by your Titan brethren. You rock the hand cannon, but you can't hit diddly-squat, so you switch to auto rifle when no one is looking. You insist you're precise, but you'd trade your sniper for a shotgun any day. Unless it's icebreaker. That thing is beast. Nothing will stop you from dancing when you capture the flag. Oh yes, you also insist you're the most skillful, but you mash buttons repeatedly, taking out an entire enemy of teams with a lightning blade. But it's okay. You have a cool cape! Does it come in men's sizes?
Titan:
You are a Titan. Self-reliant and strong. Your lack of personality and overload of testosterone made you pick the armored-warrior class. Your girlfriend is your right hand, and she's jealous of how much attention your enemies face gets with that right hand punch. When the going gets tough, you blame the Hunter for, well, being a Hunter, and blame the Warlock for not being a Titan. You lead your fireteam into the vault like Colonel Custer himself. You ask the Warlocks to push Atehon off, and then complain after the raid about how no one wants to do the raid legitimately. Your IQ is the length of your penis in inches + the amount of days you've spent playing crucible divided by your age. You dominate with your supers in crucible, but you're exotic weaponry is enough to take care of people. Everyone envies your armor, but without shaders, you'd just be another storm trooper. Are the Vex the droids you are looking for?
Warlock:
You are a Warlock. Powerful and intelligent. You don't go for capes or armor, you want that bathrobe. Your wide range of magical abilities makes your guns look like a pea-shooter, and you complain that's what your gun feels like. You've convinced yourself that you're higher up than the Titan because he's intellectually inferior, and you think the Hunter might be trying to get into your face, so you decide to silently judge them much like a [url=http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin%27s_law]-godwinslaw!-[/url] or Simon Cowell. There's a 50% chance your an Exo, and a 50% chance you're a huge geek. You lack the Hunter's bravery to dive into battle and the Titan's bravery to go revive him, so you place it chicken and self revive when necessary. That self revive does come in handy when giving the enemy a free extra kill in the crucible. You're considered a noob for pushing Atehon off the edge, but you must be skillful if it took you 30 damn minutes to finally get it right and push him off. You could be described as that one awkward guy that fantasizes a lot and there's a 19% chance you'd wear a fedora. Nice Warlocks finish last, don't they Neo?
BONUS- The Destiny Player:
You spent your cold hard (parents cash or child's college money) earnings on this incomplete game, and you're fine with that. You honestly expect to get random exotics, but that won't happen. You either enjoy Peter Dinklage's voice acting or gave this game a 4/10 on gamespot. When you finally do get an exotic you hold it close, and when Xur sells it you cry out loud for it to be nerfed, much like a small child begging for candy in a grocery store. You either enjoy Doritos or don't play this game enough. You think your posts on the forum will actually matter, but only other kids on at 11 PM will care. Thank god this game wasn't rated M right? You were upset by the expansion pack being sold the same day as the game, but you bought it anyways...didn't you squidward?
I hope you enjoyed this little joke. Feel free to add your own stereotypes below. Try not to argue too much, remember it's all just a joke. We should all be more comfortable bashing each other's class instead of crying about it on the forums. Thanks for reading!
English
#Destiny
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Wow I sadly think that this is true 😞
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The unappreciated second character of the same type I enjoy long walks on Venus picking Spirit Bloom. I went through the story hating every cutscene wishing I could skip them. I use hand me down legendary and exotic weapons until they at cool enough my alter ego. My guardian controls me with a chip on his shoulder, doing dailies and weeklys out of spite. Sometimes I don't even get to do the whole nightfall, but instead watch from the sidelines as my preferred half gets all the fun, only to drop in with time to see Phogoth burst into flames. I earn raid gear when I kill the Templar, only for the star of the show to snatch it from my own Vault of Tears. I'd rather be a stunt double, at least they get to actually look like the star.
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You forgot the PRAISE THE SUN stereotype for warlocks \[T]/
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[quote]You rock the hand cannon, but you can't hit diddly-squat, so you switch to auto rifle when no one is looking.[/quote] I shun both these weapons. Scout rifle is life. (but then what would a Warlock know about the frabjous playstyle of a Hunter anyways) [quote]You spent your cold hard (parents cash or child's college money) earnings on this incomplete game, [/quote] Nope, I earned mine through RNG.
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Warlock in hard mode: Oops, silly me, I stepped off the edge and died... -Self Res- Everybody else: Omg I fell off. Wipe. Sorry guys =( Hunters: I'm so tired of carrying you guys through the Gorgon maze! Titans: Oh #%* not the jump puzzle again!! --- Ok guys, only 25 seconds left on the buff... Get ready for the bubble in 23...
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All of these are so accurate, I swear
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I just came here to punch things...
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Over 400 replies.....Giles killing it
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The Hunter description sounds EXACTLY like my friend, impressive accuracy bro! Nice work, I enjoyed it!
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Hunter don't speak much because we don't need to. We simply know what must be done. Oh and the type that does speak... those aren't hunters, they're huntards.
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Titans suck because they always jump on you in crucible and kill you and its too easy to just run up to someone and press two buttons for instant KOs. Hunters suck because they just run around and stab you at light speed. If you see a hunter in front of you surrounded by electricity, you're done for. Don't even bother. Warlocks suck because they are very smart and handsome and have very attractive girlfriends.
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"Your IQ is the length of your penis in inches + the amount of days you've spent playing crucible divided by your age." Well, I have checked and it seems the formula need adjustment :P Anyway, good joke. Thanks.
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10/10
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There isn't enough story here. 1/10
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Titan looking down at you* You forgot to add that we like to punch everything. Also warlocks can't jump worth a damn.
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10/10 Would read again.
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Because you suck, and HK hates you
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Inaccurate description of warlock Can't handle mah space magic..
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My cloaks are so damn sexy
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Little disappointed that only Sunsingers were mentioned in the Warlock part.
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Too cute
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Dude this isn't true about titans I have my GED I'm smart!
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Warlock master race!
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I'm a warlock. But I'm not a geek nor a Exo. I use Sunsinger in PvE cause my hunter and Titan team mates suck to bad to stay alive. And Im fine with my weapons I just -blam!- all of you're races with my SPACE MAGIC!!!!!
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OMG!!! i wear a fedora in real life,,, SPACE MAGIC!!!
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Hey guys just trying to spread the good word. I'm in the industry and spoke with a gent at Bungie (no names), on the issues they are looking to fix, having NOTHING to do with the weekly update last Friday. After reading this, I just wonder why they couldn;t be more honest with both PS4 and XB1 players! http://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/77927615/0/0/1 You're welcome