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Destiny

Discuss all things Destiny.
originally posted in:Sol Guardians
9/10/2014 2:31:23 PM
11

Ocba Presents Planethopper's Guide to (Un)Intelligent Life

[b]Greetings Sol Guardian Members! (And all you who see this through your General feed)[/b] I am here to teach you all the things you need to know to transverse the our Sol-ar System and to deal with all the manner of vicious, deadly, eatable monstrosities that have invaded our sector. With this Guide, you'll always know where your towel is, what weaponry to use, and the best way to survive. Leave those electronic watches at home, we need your full attention. And don't mind the mice, they are my assistants and are far more intelligent than you. To start off, I will give you the first entry to this fantastic guide with our first Unintelligent species: [u][b]Guardians[/b][/u]: [i]Mostly Harmless[/i].

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  • Edited by Heavens Remors: 10/23/2014 2:21:27 AM
    The Editor-in-Chief would like for me to announce that the delay in entries was due to the fact that a house of fallen had beseiged the offices in outrage of one of our editor's comment about dregs holding higher intelligence than vandals. The seige was lifted when myself and said editor boarded a skiff to the ketch and terminated the kell and archon. [u][b]Minotaur:[/b][/u] [i]The term Minotaur is Old World's old world mythology where a king Minos had a half cow*/half man guard his labyrinth. (*for more information on the strange, exotic cow see its entry in the 'Old Wildlife' Secton of the guide). Seeing that the Vex Minotaur had neither horns nor hooves, I was perplexed. Since I had no desire to ask the imbecillic human who made it up, or having to come to some conclusion that they possess some kind of intelligence, I simply assumed that he/she was inebriated, running around in some Vex infrastructure, saw the huge chassis, and scream 'AAAAHHHhhhh MINOTAURrrrrr!' The Minotaur is very different from the other walking model Vex in software and hardware. I found this information while having a digital conversation with the decapitated head of a Minotaur (Don't get 'a head' of yourselves, I'm about to explain). It seems that in the creation of the Minotaur, the Vex mind gave it a simple form of AI in order for it to fulfill its role of command unit. The Minotaur was meant to provide small suggestions to the Vex mind during combat. To clarify, all Minotaur are controlled by copies of the same AI. This head told me that V0.9 prototype AI's first request was to change its body frame because it was styled after that of the goblins. Its exact words were, "This will not work! I want a larger body frame, and cover the power source already you dolt!" This explains why there are no known weakness on the MInotaurs. I continued to probe the AI, even to the extent of prolonging its life by giving it power. I asked it a simple question: Why punch people? The answer (like that of the answer to everything) was not as simple. In order to better command the Vex units on ground, the Minotaur was given advanced teleportation and two extra visual sensors. It also rigorously studied other races' combat tactics. During a combat simulation, V1.2 of the AI noticed issued with the way the Goblins were being controlled. When the information it transmitted to the Vex mind was simply moved the the trash bin, like most simple AI, it developed an emotion, frustration. Then V1.6 saw it happen during a battle with fallen. The Hobgoblins were walking with the group of Goblins, but once again it was ignored! The frustration turned into anger, and using its advance teleportation, the minotaur warped to the nearest sentient lifeform and punched it in the face wishing it was the Vex mind that the Minotaur hit. Some Humans have reported being chased down by Minotaur and punched at without provokation. When I asked the AI (which by the way is V14642379725496736296.4 of the AI), it told me that its data is transmitted at bodily death and saved to the other Minotaur. Thus if you have killed at least one Minotaur in the past, they will attack on sight if you are spotted. For its dying request, I put the head in the hand of the Ishtar Academy statue overlooking the Venus sea. It asked to enjoy the view for the few minutes it had left. I didn't tell it, but I also made a copy of its battle tactics while I was charging it. Ha! [/i]

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