Ban me, i don't care :)
edit: Story will be completed this week ;)
Edit: I have autism, so I might have made some grammarz issues. Fixed
Edjt: Part 2 https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/162763872
[u]Chapter 1[/u]
[spoiler]On a cold dark night, several members of the Flood decide to take a trip to the mansion of Recon 54. A well respected mod that enlightens all around him with his proclaimed wisdom. He is love, he is life. These are the words those of his follows and tonight… some of his luckiest followers will be granted permission to party with him at his creepy but style estate.
The group of Floodian’s Recon invited consisted of;
CrazyLincoln
The Cellar Door
Bapao
Sovereign
Ktan
Otis
XboxDotCom
Badger
…And many others
They all arrived on time with their mates, themselves or others who were keen enough to get plastered with a god of the once great. Surely there was tension between the majorities of the invitees, still baring beef among each other. That is why Lord Recon called them all here to hopefully brings them together.
Lincoln approaches the doorstep of the mansion. He is greeted by Recon’s butler. Ktan also approaches dressed in formal attire noticing Lincoln but not giving two -blam!-s.
“Hmp, the tranny lord himself. I’m still baffled why Recon hasn’t banned you Lincoln.” Ktan, looking the other way.
“We ALL saw the tab Ktan. You have homo erotic feelings for aliens. Oh its fine, no need to be so snooty!” Lincoln as is laughs at Ktan, as his face turn bright red.
Ktan becomes enrage and tries to attack Lincoln, but trips over a rock during the process. Recon’s Butler then helps him up while the trio Sovereign, Cellar and Otis approaches bringing with them a boisterous vibe.
The rest of the guess arrives. Bapao arrives in his yellow Hummer with his girlfriend. Badger descends onto Recon’s doorstep with his demonic creature. XDC is dropped off by an American eagle and the remainder of the guest all line up to enter the Haus of Recon.
The Butler then invites everyone inside, passing through the grand ball room with a crystal chandelier glimmering on the marble floor. In the very center of the room is a statue of Master Chief and Recon himself player blackjack. The Floodian’s were in a place of greatness, but little did they know… they have just been invited to a night of horror….
[i][b]A Nightmare on Bungie.Net..[/b][/i]
Everyone helped themselves to refreshments while they waited for their lord to greet them all. Without anyone noticing, KC put a lot of alcoholic beverages into the fruit punch without anyone noticing. Woupsea would’ve done the same but caught the smell of the Vodka from a mile away and just said -blam!- it and went back to whatever he was doing.
Kung Furher was going to drop bleach tablets into the fruit punch but was stopped by Shannon and met with Shannaynay justice. The ninja of Bungie arrived later than most people; they didn’t care and was only here for free booze. DeeJ and Cozmo was among them, who were dressed identically, however Cozmo had a dog lease around him…
Engrapodra arrived on a mule in his tuxedo with a beer bottle and sombrero equipped. A band of furries from B.net was right behind him. The Religious nuts, the Atheist and the old foman and new forman alike finally arrived to witness the greatness of Lord Recon…. Not a desticle in sight.
The time has finally arrived; Recon approached the balcony of the second floor in a one piece swimming suit and a crown and golden chalice. He grabbed the sparkling microphone and prepared to speak.
Everyone was in anticipation until the lights went out. ..
There was a loud screech, then a second of silence until the lights final came back on…
When they did, Lord Recon was on the first floor of his fabulous ball room naked, without a scratch on him… However something was wrong… Something was terribly wrong...
“DEAR GOD!” Electric Panda said while gazing upon the nude corpse of Lord Recon.
Everyone then turned their attention to Panda and witness the horror of what befell them. Their Lord and Savior Recon have lost….
Have lost…
His private parts…
Everyone proceed to run around the ballroom in horror and utter confusion. People are screaming for Recon to come too. A fight breaks out over by the food and punch after someone accidentally flip the table.
XDC is standing on a table screaming at the top of his voice “THIS IS WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF TRUMP ISN’T ELECTED!”
Cattie Glubs is seen strangling someone for no reason…
SpookyReacher is in a closet with a spooky skeleton doing god knows what.. .
And while there is a mass hysteria, Moskovik has a moment of clarity...
“WAIT!” Mos, as he gathers the room’s attention. He then steps to the center of the room and gaze upon Recon before saying whatever he has to say.
“There is only one person in this very room who can inflict such injuries… That person is none other than, CRAZYLINCOLN!”
The room gasps and locked eyes onto Lincoln as everyone in the room glare at him in disgust and terror.
“It wasn’t me…” Lincoln said before tackled to the ground and tied up for questioning…
[i][b]TO BE CONTINUED[/b][/i]
[/spoiler]
Chapter 2
[spoiler][i]“Yes, blame Lincoln! He is the reason why the Flood suffers. As a community we must unite and rid the Flood of such madness! All in Favor say I.”[/i]
“Shut the -blam!- up KTAN!” The Flood as someone throws a empty bowl at Ktan. He trembles to the ground is weakened. He tries to force himself up, but Engrapadora’s mule accidently poops onto his head. A silent ‘Ayylmao’ then echoes across the room like a fart in the wind, everyone then returns to the main issue, who took away Recons private parts.
Detective Dango made a dramatic entrance. As the door flung open everyone shifted their attention to Dango and gasp at his dapper appearance which cause Spen to faint at the sight of such a sly gentlemen. He approached the center of the ballroom where Recon’s genderless corpse stood under the giant statue of Master Chief.
“OKAY! Everyone Calm down. Have some danke memes while I’ll work my magic!” Dango as he ‘works’ the said magic. He discover clue that would hopefully lead to the culprit, or culprits. Reaching inside Recons pocket he removes several pictures of Flood Members… These pictures seemed to have been drawn on and edit with some cheap photo app.
They’re labeled with the names of the users in the photo, with an additional text…
Tranny Bapao
Tranny KC
Tranny Cellar
Tranny Ktan
Tranny Lincoln
Dango sight darks as he is thrown into the wall by an unseen force and everyone rushes over to his aid to help him up. When he comes to, Dango orders the arrest of The Five Floodians.
Officer Buddy, Officer Ham, Officer Slade, Officer Bardock then storms into the room with Commissioner Captain Spear to appended to culprits.
“MOD BRUTALITY COMIN’ UP!” Ham said putting Bapao in a chokehold who was cursing Ham out in Indonesian. He realized what he was being called, so he pulled out his nightstick and threatened to shove up it in an uncomfortable place.
While the other officers place the remainder culprits in handcuffs, Dango finally rid himself of the horrid images and urged everyone to stay calm, they were safe. Which was a lie?
A sinister laugh echoes throughout the ballroom. The lights then go off for a second before bellows of the coming victims’ breaks the silence. As the lights return, nearly have the room has already lost their privates parts. Sundew was among them, he had his privates removed in a grotesque manner, and now resembled one of those mannequins you see at a clothing store.
Everyone else alive with their privates parts have scattered like roaches clawing on the bullet proof glass. Trapped like mice trying to escape this horror, the fear of losing what makes them a human male or females. The glass of the windows couldn’t even shatter after all the neckbeards and fedora tossed at them. There was no way out.
Badger then realized that he could just walk out of with the help of Satan. He prayed to his demon overload and his grisly red hands reaches up from the floor and pulled Badger from his doom to safety.
“NUKE! NUKE ! NUKE!” Gasa chanted as he watched apocalypse unfold.
Eventually, something happened. Some very bad…
Cellar began to transform into his evil alter ego revealing his true form in all its terror.
Tranny Cellar, from left to right removed all the privates of the helpless Floodians in his wake. His gaze moved down dozens. Bio tried to escape by climbing into the floorboards, but is immediately caught by the beast and is tranniefied to oblivion.
Not many are left; Cellar is pleased of his work finally setting his sight on Cattie who is backed into a corner…
“Someone -blam!-ing help me!” She bellows.
As Cellar goes in for the kill, he’s been hit by a… Struck by… A bottle of bleach. He then slithers up the walls going up to the second floor.
[b]TO BE CONTINUED[/b][/spoiler]
Part two and finale over here!
https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/162763872
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Legit shit posts. I like it
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rip :(
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We need a Le Cave version of this
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LOL! I'm actually mentioned in there!
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Cnab I be in story? I may los priavtes ok
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[quote] XDC is standing on a table screaming at the top of his voice “THIS IS WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF TRUMP ISN’T ELECTED!” [/quote] This part legitimately made me laugh out loud. The guy in the stall next to me is probably really confused.
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Oh look. Diarrhea post.
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Bored 4 minutes in
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[quote] XDC is standing on a table screaming at the top of his voice “THIS IS WHAT WILL HAPPEN IF TRUMP ISN’T ELECTED!” [/quote] This part legitimately made me laugh out loud. The guy in the stall next to me is probably really confused.
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2spooky4me
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DANGO BAMP
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He's been hit by- he's been struck by- a spoook criminal
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Can their be an extra that says" You're probably going to die dead." Then a fissure opens and while falling he says"Holes are OP needs nerf" then i show up and say" Not as OP as your mom's mouth"
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3 spoop
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I could be the one guy in the back playing a game boy and only starts screaming because he failed at Pokemon pinball
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¿No Lopez?
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Is NoiselessPurse the private stealer?
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Does Mr Skeltal appear?
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Thank you for including me though that means a lot to me
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Why would I run away I doubt God him self could cut off my wee wee of doom?
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You can't make something like this without an entrance from the great master of jokes. Better known as DeAdKiTtEnPIE
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This just keeps getting better.
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Gûr, I love this. I would be honored if my private parts were mutilated.
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May I be in this story