When I was walking my grandma's dogs along the beach, I saw a girl from school I hated and the two dogs went apeshit on her, so I accidentally dropped the lead and after a good 5 minutes of them chasing her down the beach, I pick up the lead and say "Sorry, they're bred to catch rats." I then proceed to skip home and sip hot chocolate.
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It's a long story, ask for full story if you want but we basically bought 10 condoms from a dispenser in a restaraunt bathroom and blew them up [spoiler]Kaboom [/spoiler] like ballons and stuffed them in a stall
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"I dont have the time, nor the crayons to explain that to you
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Some girl was going on and on and on and wouldn't shut up in the middle of class. >"... Idk, I've just been like... Really stressed out lately" > her friend "Girl, you just need to loosen up a bit" > Me "Trust me Hun, the way the room is smelling; she's loose enough"