Wanna hear a joke? a guy took a bath with bubbles
Wanna hear a dirty joke? [spoiler]bubbles is a guy[/spoiler]
Why is Sarah sad? [spoiler]because she has an abusive stepfather [/spoiler]
I wrote this thing semi drunk and I can't believe all the response it has had
We just hit 666 replays on this thread so I think we all might die
And can someone tell me how the fûck I find out how many replies this has its driving me crazy or at least tell many I have now
English
#Offtopic
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Parents are like toast [spoiler]If they're black you won't have food[/spoiler] Figured it goes well with "dark" humor. Alright I'll show myself to the exit now.
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What's the difference between trees and children? [spoiler]Trees don't scream when you chop them down[/spoiler]
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Wait....ive already posted here...
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We need more of this
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"Daddy something's under my bed" *father looks down* "Daddy somebody is on my bed"
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[i]Ah yes, dark humor.[/i]
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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? [spoiler]because he got hit by a bus[/spoiler] What's scarier then a spider? [spoiler]a gun[/spoiler]
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1) How do you start an African rave? [spoiler]Tape a piece of bread to the ceiling[/spoiler] 2) What did Jimmy get for Christmas? [spoiler]Cancer[/spoiler] What did he get for his birthday? [spoiler]Nothing, he didn't live that long[/spoiler] Well... I did [url=http://www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godwin%27s_law]-godwinslaw!-[/url] that coming, Anne Frank-ly I don't care.
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What do you call a black priest?[spoiler]holy shit[/spoiler] What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? [spoiler]pizza doesn't scream[/spoiler]
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Dark jokes are like food[spoiler]not everyone gets it[/spoiler]
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Who are the fastest readers in the world? [spoiler]9/11 Victims. They went through 100 stories In a minute. [/spoiler] How do you stop a a baby from running around? [spoiler]Nail it's hand to the floor. [/spoiler] How do you stop it from running in circles? [spoiler]Nail the other hand down. [/spoiler] I out babies in blenders feet first, know why! [spoiler]So I am see the look on their faces when I turn it on. [/spoiler]
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I'm really jealous of black people, they get to say the N word. All I get to say that they can't is, "hey dad"
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A guy was walking to a bar and on his way he found a girl tied up to the railroad tracks. He untied her and they had sex. Guy gets to the bar, friends ask why he's so late, tells them about the girl he found and all the different positions they -blam!-ed in. Friends give him props and ask if he got head, guy replies "I couldn't find it."
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Edited by Vyronic: 9/1/2015 1:43:48 AMNot dark but definitely offensive..... What's the only thing a Muslim can eat during Ramadan? [spoiler]Qur'an on the Kaaba[/spoiler]
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How do u pick up a Jewish girl? [spoiler]with a dust pan[/spoiler]
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Bring it on back
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Who are the fastest readers in human history [spoiler]the people of 9 11 they went through 90 stories in under a minute [/spoiler]
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A black guy, a mexican, and an asian are in the back of a car. Who is driving? [spoiler]the cop[/spoiler] Whats white at the top and black at the bottom? [spoiler]society[/spoiler] What do you call a million black people skydiving? [spoiler]night[/spoiler]
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Who the -blam!- NECROBUMP
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Jesus may have fed thousands of people with fish and bread but..... [spoiler] Hitler made two million Jews toast.[/spoiler]
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What do you call a bunch of skinny African kids in a pool? [spoiler]A soup of baby rib bones[/spoiler]
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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.
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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? [spoiler]the wheel chair[/spoiler] What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? (Warning its mean)[spoiler]nothing she's already been told twice[/spoiler] What do you call a bunch of paraplegic people in a sauna? [spoiler]steamed vegetables[/spoiler]
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So i have this epiPen. Its the last thing my friend gave me. I couldnt quite make out what he was saying before he died, but he was REALLY insistant i have it.
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These jokes are the best
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"Dark humor is like food...not everyone gets it."