I had a really good Destiny joke... ...but I phogoth it. Why are Titan's eyes always hurting? It's because they cant blink. Where is Destiny's story? It's shrouded in the darkness. How did the Traveler get it's name? It never dribbles. Why did the guardians cross the road? Because the storyline was on the other side. I have a crush on one of the Archons... ...I guess you can say that I've Fallen in love. Girl, are you Venus? Because you make my Spirit Bloom. I used to be a Guardian like you... ...then I took a sparrow to the knee. Want to hear a Gjallarhorn joke? Oh wait... you might not get it. I went to a hive party on the moon last week... ...it was pretty en-thrall-ing. What do you call a Vex with one leg? A hobblegoblin. Help! Hive fallen and I cant get up! Why cant Xur get a girlfriend? Because he doesn't have enough Ice Breakers. You don't think people like these puns? I disagree, let's take a Xurvey to find out for sure. The 3 X's of Hawkmoon. 1. Xcellent 2. Xtravegent 3. Xboxless What is a Knight's favorite game? Hive and seek. Where does Xur get all his exotics? From No Land Beyond. I wanted to open some new doors... ...but they warlocked it. I cant seem to get any exotics... ...I think I have Bad Juju. What do you call two acolytes clapping hands? A Hive five. Why was the Archon Priest arrested? Vandal-ism. Let me give you some super good advice... ...don't use it. I try to tell people "pulse rifles suck"... ...but they never listen to my three little words. Why do female guardians always argue? Because they always want the last word. What do voidwalkers apply to chaffed skin? Nova Balm. What is Crota's least favorite strike? Knightfall. Doctor please help me... ...I've got this cut and I think it's Invective. Why doesn't the cryptarch sleep? Because he's awoken. They might as well rename the "Iron Banner" to the "Iron Rose"... ...because there are so many Thorns in it. Hey girl, are those pants purple? Because dat ass is legendary. My girlfriend is like my Gjallarhorn... ...I don't have one. Some of the missions on Venus piss me off... ...they are rather Vexing. The Cryptarch. Get it? He's the joke. My farts after Taco Bell are like Dragon's Breath... ...they stink. What's a bowling pin's least favorite Destiny mode? Strike. Why do you have a No Land Beyond above your fireplace? Because I like it on dis-mantle. How does Master Rahool like his legendary engrams? Rare. Why don't warlocks have any exotic boots? Because they are used to being carried. Did you hear that Bungie added a shotgun only playlist? It's called Inferno. I wanted to make a Destiny joke... ...but all the good ones Archon. I am a warlock, and I am tired of titans always asking me if I even Lift. Yo momma is so fat that when she goes to the tower... Lord Shaxx says: "You're crushing them". Athoen just got ejected from the game... ...turn out he was taking supplicants. What did Eddard Stark say at the Iron Banner... ... Brace yourself, felwinter is coming. Why do people quit Mars strikes? Because they don't have the patience and time. Please don't say another Destiny joke... One more and I'm getting the Hellmouth out of here. [All from Mr. Fruit's "Heard in Destiny" videos, I do not own these jokes, but I thought they were hilarious. Have a wonderful day Guardians!]