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4/6/2015 5:27:30 AM
9

I Shot Porch Last Night

The police are taking the carcass away. But last night I heard an intruder. I grabbed my 12 gauge strap-on and searched my house. When I saw a pretty big guy in my living room, I pegged him and when I turned on the light I saw he was dressed like a giant slab of concrete. The costume looked very authentic. The police say it's the most realistic costume they've ever seen. They can't even figure out how to get the head off to see his face. He had a red purse filled with Dogs of all breeds and was hiding them on people's porches (and assholes). I think he was a terrorist.

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