Ok, I've actually been thinking about how to do this already. I have Elise on SSX3 all tricked out with some daisy dukes, angel wings, and a sweet cowboy hat. I love her. (btw, where the hell is the 360 SSX title?) So, 1st up, we need a body. I've tried different techniques for this, but the ones I make haven't been working. Splinters kind of suck, and no matter how much you sand, it's just not smooth, or supple enough to fake it. I propose we buy a few of those Real Dolls out of California. I'd link, but those of you who know what I'm talking about, will also know why I don't link to a description. Look it up. Anyway, I think that this might be another good place to use the [url=http://www.bungie.net/fanclub/120543/Forums/posts.aspx?postID=13077911] Allen-Bradly Retro Turboencabulator Dingle Arm Narsoule Vein apparatus [/url], with appropriate modifications, of course. So, here we go, it should be fairly simple. 1st, you'll need to hack your 360. In the process of doing so, rather than installing the normal jumper, you'll want to link it, in series to the Allen-Bradley Turboencabulator. This way, when the graphical data is processed, it will be properly synced with the AI necessary for proper thought algorithms. Then, I say we implement the improbability drive that I developed for the early rocket design [url=http://www.bungie.net/fanclub/120543/Forums/posts.aspx?postID=17728263]transfer[/url]. For those of you unable to view, it's really rather simple. Simply set up a dual split observation experiment, as commonly referenced in quantum dynamics theoretical descriptions. The difference is, we need to implement a high speed camera, with an instantaneous shutter. Set the camera to dilate, and iris the shutter at a rate of 500 fluctuations per microsecond. When the electrons are moving, they will not be able to tell whether or not they are being observed. Thus, confused by whether or not they are being observed, the particles will [i]improbably[/i] act as both waves and particles. This way, an infinite array of possible quantum paths will be available. Simply hardwire this system into the turboencabulator, at the input level, just ahead of the dump cache, with series amplifiers that will exponentially increase the level of input redundancy dependent on the complexity of the AI variable input loops. This should properly increase the thought patterns applied by Mass Effect, and create "thought-loops" that will very accurately replicate the confusion of an average hot blonde trying to figure out how to make the round peg fit into the square hole. That should give us an appropriate level of intelligence. Considering the origin of AI, she should be able to code, hack, fight, and generally kick tail; but, she won't have the presence of mind to argue, or develop conflicting opinions with her user. That is unless the argument involves combat, or programming code. It will also be necessary to link in some of the more advanced programming being developed for the Japanese prototype "slave-bots". [Foman - pm me for more information on this piece of programming] Once this little tidbit is also in place, she should have the capacity for *ahem, -lust. Now that we've got that all setup, it's time to get the Real Doll in place. This will most easily be performed by using another tri-core processor (preferably from a RRoD 360) that will be installed in the cranium of the doll. This will serve as a dump for all the processing data performed during the initial boot, and awareness cycles. Now, to address a few final concerns. First off, it is imperative that the improbability drive is properly functioning. To test it, ask it for something completely unlikely, like say, a ninja pirate lumberjack spartan zombie friend. If it gives you what you ask for, and it is highly improbable, then it probably works. Next, for the process to have enough power to transfer the necessary static running life charge, into the doll, we will have to attach a lightning rod to the apparatus, and set the initiate switch to activate only in the event of a lightning strike. Unfortunately, this means you will have to wait for a storm to activate the sensor apparatus. The level of power necessary is likely to overheat the system, so it must be maintained in a liquid water bath, incased in a liquid nitrogen shell. Since the processors will likely fry if wet, then it will be necessary to install sofish around all the critical components. The sofish will absorb any excess water, and properly protect sensitive components. One more item of concern. Life. For this, I suggest that we petition Bungie for a small piece of Ling-Ling's brain tissue. This will provide the final connection between the turboencabulator, improbablility drive, and the doll's processor. If properly assembled, the action report perform the following tasks: 1. Lightning strikes 2. The hacked 360 will power on, and begin to overheat. 3. The unit will flood with supercooled liquid H20. 4. The sofish(es?i?) will absorb excess coolant, and allow the processing units to activte. 5. The Allen-Bradley Turboencabulator will sync with the improbability drive. 6. The improbability drive will reach capacity, and improbably work. 7. The confused electrons will allow new quantum paths, reconfigure the input, and send the first bit of code to the Ling-Ling tissue connector. 8. As the first electrical impulse makes contact with the dolls processor, it will ping, sending an exact replica of the code back through the Ling-Ling connector. 9. The Improbability drive will begin to overheat, and reflood with coolant. 10. The Improbability drive will dump all data, but released in an organic process developing precisely 23 chromosome pairs worth of encoding, and bounce the signal back across the energy dump created by the lightning strike. 11. The high energy chromosome coding will eject back across the Ling-Ling connector, and carry with it, confused electrons that were created in excess by the Improbability drive upon the initial signal ping bounce. 12. The high energy code, now properly induced with excess confusion particles, will bombard the Doll's processor, and reinstitute the original code, converted into organic electric code with an overcharged electrical staticity. 13. The dolls processor will be forced to convert itsself into wetware, and take on the chromosomal code, leaving behind the perfect amount of organic static charge necessary to sustain the thought loops. Shazaam! Mass Effect girlfriend come to life! Warning: Take certain care when installing sofish. If properly organized, there should not be any burns on the doll's body.