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Edited by DINO DELUSIONAL: 2/9/2016 9:24:00 PM
293

what you last copy pasted will be your weapon in a north korean invasion

golden deagle. HOLY BLAM! This is trending
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  • Heya -blam!-wits eat my microdick

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  • 80's. I win.

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  • Edited by sir_m: 2/10/2016 4:59:06 PM
    ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Lenny, great...

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    • Years ago In this very restaurant The Hash Slinging Slasher used to be a fry cook Just. like. You. Only Clumsier! The one night, when he was CUTTING the Patties It happened He forgot the secret sauce? No He didn't wash his hands No Irregular portions? NO! He cut off his own hand by mistake! You mean like this? Or like this? x8 Except he wasn't a sponge So? SO IT DIDNT GROW BACK AHHHH NO! And replaced his hand with a rusty spatulas And he got hit by a bus And at his funeral they fired him! Now every- what night is it? Tuesday Tuesday Night! His ghost returns to the Krusty Krab, to reap his horrible vengeance... *gasp* But today's Tuesday Night Then he'll be coming How do we know? There are 3 signs that signal the approach of the Hash Slinging Slasher First the lights will flicker on and off, next- Dude can I have some ketchup Oh here you go Next the phone will ring and there will be nobody there Finally the Hash Slinger Slasher arrives in the ghost of the bus that ran him over He exits the bus and crosses the street without looking both ways. Because he's already dead. He taps on the window with his greasy spatula hand He opens the door *screech* He slowly approaches the counter... You know what he does next? What? You really want to know? What? Are you sure you want to know? WHAT WHAT WHAT DOES HE DO?! He gets ya! *SCREAMING* *laughing*

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      2 Replies
      • Gimme the bitches phone number and I'll have em -blam!-ed for days 😈 Soooo I'm pretty screwed

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      • Pretty good I say

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      • I respectfully disagree that that isn't unprofessional.

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      • Would you rather sleep with Caitlyn Jenner or Hillary Clinton? okay... [spoiler]wort[/spoiler]

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      • https://youtu.be/ZjfBSDawHQ8

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      • https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/189767875/0/0

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      • So a vid from rooster teeth...

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      • Man ear pig is better than puppy monkey baby

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      • They are boned. I'm sorry to any who watches this.

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      • Your transaction cannot be processed at this time. [spoiler]fml[/spoiler]

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      • PuppymonkeybabyPuppymonkeybabyPuppymonkeybabyPuppymonkeybaby

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      • http://www.idigitaltimes.com/star-wars-battlefront-gameplay-beta-release-announced-early-october-471237 Darth vader, an at at and an e11 blaster with thermal detonators. Im good.

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      • I would post it but I would probably be banned so no

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      • Stand back. I'll take it from here.

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      • https://media0.giphy.com/media/EZYQjm1uPrXGg/giphy.gif

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      • [b][/b]

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      • Edited by bhsnipes: 2/9/2016 7:05:47 PM
        Ha-ha.

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      • Talos the mighty! Talos the unnerring! Talos the Unassailable! To you, we give praise! We are but maggots, writhing in the FILTH of our own corruption! While you have ascended from the DUNG of mortality, now walk among the stars! Aye, you were once man. And as man, you said - "Let me show you the power of Talos Stormcrown, born of the North, where my breath is long winter! I breathe now in royalty, and reshape this land that is mine. I do this for you, Red Legion, for I LOVE YOU!" Aye, love. LOVE! Even as man, great Talos cherished us! For he saw in us; in each of us; the future of Skyrim! The future of Tamriel! And there it is, friends! The ugly truth! We are but children of man, Talos is the true GOD of man! Ascended from flesh, to rule the realm of spirit. The very idea is inconcievable to our elven overlords! Sharing the heavens? With man! HA! They can barely tolerate our presence on Earth! Today, they take away your faith. But what of tomorrow? What then?! Do the elves take your homes? Your buisinesses? YOUR CHILDREN? YOUR VERY LIVES?!?!?! And what does the empire do? NOTHING! Nay, worse than nothing! The Imperial Machine enforces the will of the Thalmor! Against its own people! So rise up...RISE UP AGAINST THE EMPIRE. RISE UP, STORMCLOAKS! EMBRACE THE WORD OF MIGHTY TALOS, HE WHO IS BOTH MAN, AND DIVINE! For we are the children of man! And we shall inherit both Heavens and Earth! And we, not the elves, will rule Skyrim forever! Terrible and powerful Talos! We are unworthy servants, give praise! For only through your grace may we truly reach enlightenment! And deserve our praise, you do, for we are one! 'Ere, you ascend, and the Eight became Nine, you walked among us, great Talos, not as god, but as man!

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      • There lived a certain man in Russia long ago He was big and strong, in his eyes a flaming glow Most people looked at him with terror and with fear But to Moscow chicks he was such a lovely dear He could preach the bible like a preacher Full of ecstasy and fire But he also was the kind of teacher Women would desire Ra ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian queen There was a cat that really was gone Ra ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine It was a shame how he carried on He ruled the Russian land and never mind the czar But the cassock he danced really wunderbar In all affairs of state he was the man to please But he was real great when he had a girl to squeeze For the queen he was no wheeler dealer Though she'd heard the things he'd done She believed he was a holy healer Who would heal her son Ra ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian queen There was a cat that really was gone Ra ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine It was a shame how he carried on But when his drinking and lusting and his hunger For power became known to more and more people The demands to do something about this outrageous Man became louder and louder This man's just got to go, declared his enemies But the ladies begged, don't you try to do it, please No doubt this Rasputin had lots of hidden charms Though he was a brute they just fell into his arms Then one night some men of higher standing Set a trap, they're not to blame Come to visit us they kept demanding And he really came Ra ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian queen They put some poison into his wine Ra ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine He drank it all and said, I feel fine Ra ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian queen They didn't quit, they wanted his head Ra ra Rasputin Russia's greatest love machine And so they shot him 'til he was dead Oh, those Russians

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        1 Reply
        • XD

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        • Shoot them with Nukes you -blam!-

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