You put the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) into the ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) hole, and you necrobump dolph's posts

Son, there's an application called Netflix...

When a man and a woman love each other very much, they go to an Internet cafe to perform a file transfer. The man's floppy disc becomes a hard drive, and he plugs it in to her port. When he completes the upload, he ejects, but if they forgot to use firewall then the woman could get a virus. And that's how babies are made.

Earlier this year, a chinese family moved into my small town. The family had two twins who were both seniors in my class, Ving and Ling. Ving and his sister Ling were quiet to start off with, but eventually I made good friends with Ving. After talking to him for a few weeks he revealed to me that he absolutely abhored his name, and that he'd do almost anything to figure out how to get it changed. I asked him what he wanted to change it to, and he said "lee, like bruce lee or some shit." I was failing trigonometry at the time, and so I thought what the hell, and offered to help him in exchange for him doing my homework. Ling overheard us and chimed in, "If you do that, father will disown you as our child. That name has been in our family line for generations." Ving never really listened to his sister though, and he still wanted to go through with the plan. The next day after school, I drove him to the town hall. After we arrived, he had gotten the name-change sheet and was scribbling down information on to it when I saw his face change. I could tell he was extremely conflicted with his choice. Tears began to stream down his face. He finally decided that he was gonna have to cancel his request, and Ling looked relieved. The receptionist let us know that there would be a cancelation fee, and handed the fee waiver to her. Suddenly, A short asian man with neon shorts, ray-bans, and an american flag t-shirt bursted into the room. Ving turned in awe and stared at the man, as tears rolled down his cheeks. "D-D-Dad?" With a huge smile on his face, the man ran up and embraced his son. "Don't stop, be Lee, Ving. Hold on the that fee, Ling"

1. Shrek breaks into your house 2. Shrek shrekifies you 3. It's all ogre now

What you and your uncle do together, but with your parents!

Well, boys have an outie, and girls have an innie. When a boys puts his outie in a girls innie, an egg is laid in the ladies tummy. Then, after 9 months, the egg hatches in the mommies tummy, and she goes to the hospital to have the doctors get the baby out. Then, a baby is born

...

When mummies and daddies love each their very much a baby is made. The end. *tucks you into bed*

bang bang

[quote]BAM BAM BAM BAM BAM[/quote]