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Edited by Owlish Athena:
7/5/2016 9:50:12 PM
201
The Bad PvP Teammate Identification Guide
Let's be honest, most of us have done at least one of these at some point. This list is purely for entertainment and fun.
1) The Lone Wolf Pup- someone who thinks they can do everything on their own but gets first blood for the other team
2) The Politician- the one that insists on using you as a human meat shield
3) The Lost Puppy- that teammate that is scared and follows you around but misses every shot they make
4) The Statue- the teammate that is frozen the entire match (AFK)
5) The Spotlight - the teammate that wears a bright shader and wonders why they can't find good cover
6) The Forever Confused- the one that can't tell who is on their team
7) The Ghost - that guy that you forget was even on your team
8) The Benedict Arnold- the traitor that pushes you into enemy fire
9) The Death Wish - the one that runs out and yells at the other team to shoot him
10) The Lagger - this is the one that has such a bad connection that he can somehow faze through walls
11) The Brick Wall- this is the teammate that walks in front of you when you are killing someone so that instead of getting a kill, you shoot your teammate in the back of the head
If you have any others, be sure to add them in!
Be sure to share any videos if you have them!
ヽ(´▽｀)/
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2 RepliesThe Ascendant The Guy who gets Phantoms, Seventh Columns, and Sum of all Tears like there is no tomorrow.
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4 RepliesImpatient Zombie - Spams the respawn button even though his teammates are right next to his orb [spoiler]guilty lol[/spoiler]
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Edited by Xero: 7/9/2016 11:28:04 AMThe "You Go First..." teammate: That one person who manages to push you out of cover when you are both hiding, resulting in you getting killed. Sargent Sacrifice: That one teammate who runs in the opposite direction, when you are trying to run for cover at low health, keeping you both in the same spot. This also results in you getting killed, and possibly him.
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1 ReplyThe Slayer - The guy who gets like 30 kills and a 5.0KD but doesn't cap a single flag, losing the game for their team anyway. [spoiler]that's me lol[/spoiler]
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Edited by Luna: 7/9/2016 7:21:36 AMWhat do we call those people who teabag their own teammate who just got killed? (Saw it in trials once and it happened to me within the past week. So twice so far) The dick move I guess? Edit: the person it happened to in trials was on the enemy team. Thought I'd clear that up.
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1 ReplyEdited by NervouspyZ: 7/9/2016 2:05:21 AM[b]The Bubble Blower[/b]- that guy that decides to drop his bubble during heavy [b][i][u]JUST[/u][/i][/b] as you launch your rocket [b]The Dumbslinger[/b]- activates golden gun when absolutely [b][i][u]NOBODY[/u][/i][/b] is around [b]The Funbreaker[/b]- Rushes enemy team and wonders why he didn't get a kill [b]The Strike Tyke[/b]- Fist of Panics a single hapless enemy. Usually because they are at low health. Most of the time proceeds to detonate a map hazard (explosive cube/cylinder) and kill himself. Misses Shoulder Charge 80% of the time [b]The Stormfaller[/b]- guy who Ionic Blinks off the edge of the map [b][i][u]CONSISTENTLY[/u][/i][/b] [b]The Bladeprancer[/b] Blinks directly into the enemy's shotguns. [u][b][i]EVERY SINGLE TIME DAMMIT[/i][/b][/u] [b]The Dumbsinger[/b]- Activates Radiance when surrounded by the enemy team or when covered by 2+ snipers. [b]The Nova Bum[/b]- Will miss his Nova Bomb no matter how close to the enemy he throws it. [b]The Shadowshart[/b]- Will run Quiver so he has 3 chances to get kills and he will use all of them to miss the same person 3 times.
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I am absolutely a couple of these :D.
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I am definitely a brick wall to my friend. Also a politician, so guilty of this during trials.
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10 RepliesThe Experimenter - The teammate who deliberately uses weapons that don't fit in the meta/are outright terrible either to see if they can actually be effective or just for shits and giggles. [spoiler]This is me[/spoiler]
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9 RepliesI never cap flags but I top leaderboards, what am I?
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You can't really identify most of these unless you're in a party with them. The traitor has to be the most annoying but funniest thing that can happen in the crucible though.
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1 ReplyThe mother-blam!-er - revives you in front of enemies
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1 ReplyIf you see me in your group, you know.
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14 RepliesEdited by silverbullet962: 7/8/2016 8:42:54 PMMr inconsistent -- the guy who is top overall with a 3+ kd and next match at the bottom with .5 or less Edit... looks like i hit the nail on the head for some of us, myslef included.
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I dont mind having bullet sponges on my team :)
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3 RepliesEdited by z3473501: 7/7/2016 5:34:35 AMThe Deadweight - the guy with 1 kill (likely from fist of havoc) and 20 deaths who single-handedly causes your team to lose. He also gets the god roll Ash Factory at the end. The Tryhard - you forget he exists, and he effectively doesn't anyway, because he spends the entire match hardscoping from the back of the map. Thinks he's the best because he has a KDR of 2+ (but only 2 kills). There's a 90% chance he uses MIDA and LDR/1KYS/LS The Shouldercharger - he must get those Shoulder charge kills, regardless of everyone wrecking him with shotguns and max armor warlocks and titans surviving his shoulder charge. He'll try, even if it means running across 20m of open space/sniper lanes.
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2 RepliesThe spectator- He will stand there and watch you engage and enemy player but dosent start firing at him until you die..
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4 RepliesThe meta: that guy who uses something that they saw a youtuber go unbroken with, but still has no gun skill.
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1 ReplyNumber 5 is wrong, you arn't a true crucible player until you run around every match with midnight lumos equipped.
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I'm none of these but by the definition I'm sure there are more cases
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1 ReplyYou forgot the kill stealer. I haven't played since feb, but I had a buddy I played with that I would jack his kills sometimes. My best record was getting him 15 assists. Took awhile to get the timing down, but so worth it. Ours was in good fun though. We died a couple of times waiting for the other to shoot.
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When you play RIFT and the enemy gets the spark and your teammates go somewhere and leave and you and maybe another guy are left alone to fight the entire enemy team at the RIFT
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1 ReplyEdited by PushedBean764: 7/8/2016 11:21:16 AMThe Magnet - the enemy player that flies past the player you're trying to shoot, effectively causing your sights to veer off in the direction he or she flew to, getting you killed in the process. [spoiler]I know the thread is about teammates, but I don't care.[/spoiler]
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3 RepliesBlack Shield:. Anyone that immediately runs inside off spawn
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The warrior of light: intentionally fires at teammates wearing taken gear. Rombo: takes heavy solo and dies charging the enemy team hip firing a machine gun The broken record: dies repeatedly by running the same lanes or approaching the same situations the same way Stationary medic: constantly tries to pull revives in front of enemies while simply standing there The too late guy: activates his super when he's already one shot from death (panic fist excluded)
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I'm #1 without the death first xD But haven't been on PVP lately too -blam!-ing laggy
