*wipes chest off* did it

My closest friend treats me like she never cares what I have to say act acts like I'm no one to her. She really dosent care about anything. She says the only thing she cares about is me but it's really hard to believe it by the way I get treated. I can't leave her because I care about her too much, even though she does all this stuff to me. It really hurts me because she's the one that I'm in love with and she always seems to take me for granted

I gotta fight two -blam!- in a couple of days and they like 4 years older than me and bigger than me so I've been listenin to hype music the past couple of days to get ready for this (happened cause of my girl and its a street fight) should I fight them?

Well there's this girl, right? And her and I were so close to being a thing, but one day, out of the blue she tells me that she now has a boyfriend and he looks like the biggest piece of shit ever. I don't know if I hate her for it or if I still care about her.

I've been wanting to kill myself and I want to talk to my friends about it but I don't know how to bring it up.

This one is a bit hard for me to explain.....I really dont know what the hell is going on. Real personal stuff inbound: [spoiler]So basically since September last year, I've had this weird AF feeling with me. Intense sadness, dampened anger, but also a severe lack of strength and motivation. This also intensified by Christmas, and has been like that ever since. I've found myself day dreaming a lot, less than when I was little, but more than the past 5 years. I feel unsafe at home due to personal reasons, and it feels like I have an overarching presence that judges my every move. What do I daydream about? Mainly school, and what life would be like if my dad was not there. Before all this I would be described as a shy person, yet also chirpy, and generally well rounded. Almost everyone I knew, I was on good terms with. After all this, I became more confident (credit due to all of the 'public speaking' stuff I did in English this year), signifigently so. But also sad and instead of shyness, sort of like a sickness in situations where I would have been shy. And now "I take every statement to heart". I am looking at this in the most logical way possible. Its the way my brain comprehends most things. It doesnt help when your Dad literally made you and other family members feel like a piece of sh1t ever since you could remember. This also intensified over Xmas... Some moments, I literally lie on my bed, feel my heart pound on my chest, stare at one of the bed posts, and just stay there. Finding it hard to move and not wanting to move. Hours have past before I realised... I dont know what to do, mainly because I dont want to mention it in school and I cant mention it at home as I feel.that is the source of the problem. Cant and wont view replies until I wake up, its midnight where I am right now.[/spoiler]

I killed every paladin possible in fallout 4 and couldn't comoket brotherhood of steel quest line. I'm bi but my parents don't know I'm the only one that knows aside from a trusted friends and I don't think anyone else would accept me for it so there it is

This isn't a shitpost. To understand it, read through all of it We learned to band together and endeavor Clasp our hands together Man developed language, letters An incredible advantage, getting plans together But would we stand the test of time Against the planet's reckless climate And its angry weather? Spread the sails And head west against the gales And storms aboard Norse longboats With decks as dense as nails Our aim was riding waves And finding, claiming strange horizons Invading islands Native populations slain with violence Enslaved and made to aim skyward Think of bigger things - sphinxes, pyramids Raise them high in the name of different kings The different things we've held sacred, divine Through places and times The range of supplications and rites Through ages we find Nations arise As old civilizations crumble to dust Becoming strangers in time, waiting to die Replaced in the night The day breaks and the light changes Illuminating newer human faces as fights rage The human race is facing the might Of righteous states who would write The history books even if it took a knife's blade To find the right page Sengoku Jidai Men offered to die For the honor of a warrior's life The sun's coming and we're watching it rise As a new era's here, it's as solid as iron Pull the tongs from the fire Strike the hammer to the anvil Craft a weapon to bring an enemy to a standstill The blacksmith is the wizard that gives us These powers - devour enemies Leaping down from the siege towers The better the tech is The lesser the effort to wreck it The less time to see their eyes And feel sympathetic Never regret it A true knight never stays a true blade Never says touché But would forever lay in blue rays of weathered glades To demonstrate his never-ending dedication To the crusade Reformation through flame And after the cremation is a new age Time's quill is quick to spill its ink onto a new page The faces are the same as when in days gone But brains are cultivated thus creating The Renaissance We're still using steel tools to stay strong Replacing blades with greater trades Pen and paper, song Faith in God is tested, hiding in the desert Men excited, then enlightened by the scientific method Tried describing its expression By inscribing his impression When applying it to heavenly bodies That everybody reckoned Must have been made by a creator or a greater force Nature's author faced examination never faced before The grace of horse and rider Replaced by wars and violence Debased the laws of science Made the case for all the pious Why is it progress always leads to loads of mess The western region spread across the globe and coalesced Settlers spread disease with effortless ease Was it reckless or did it just happen inevitably? While evidently we never can see Through the lens of this century But there's no retreating now Whether or not it was meant to be The seven seas were sailed Navies prevailed Leaving trails of devastation in their wake As people wailed A world of wonder plundered traded in the name of progress But human nature's way shows we should expect no less Oh yes, struck by the realisation this is just civilisation In the natal stages of industrialisation, trust me when I say That previous achievements are just child's play Compared to this colossal school of thought We set the world ablaze with fossil fuel we bought It's an epiphany Giving us pretty much infinite energy It's electricity Edison, Nikola Tesla - different inventors Giving us everything we depend on Whether it's engines, cinema, television or telecoms Sending a message and spreading it on These unreal frontier channels We develop the tech and then sell it on The reel travels round With the speed of a machine gun's barrels Machinery's a meaner beast and we're still in the saddle No need for cavalry - battle superseded that with ease Allies and Axis Charging each other like batteries A power vacuum allowing the superstates to flourish Redistribute the food even if it means people are malnourished Propaganda is the only view that you're allowed to publish Cause totalitarians are well aware of how to punish Gunning down numbers countless For doubtless nothings that they've done But that won't stop subversive insurgents From coming out with courage Using their power to the fullest Whether creativity or demonstrating general relativity Evidently when we find time to be efficient Einsteinian clear vision can reveal the precision behind the blinds Nuclear fission Despite derision Physicists decide the mission is dividing, splitting atoms 'Till a blinding light is given, quite efficient The divine right to mankind's plight is christened A minor decision hijacked by politicians But as long as they listen to the will of the people Treat all as brilliant equals, we can achieve more Than we've ever conceived before Leave this poor place Please explore space Earth, she's a small base Even more awaits I implore great leaders To lead with all the grace Of which we're capable And be the author of your fate Band together and endeavour Clasp our hands together As our ancestors have And stand the test of time forever That's my problem... There has been too much shit through the human race

[spoiler]sophomore homecoming I got drunk and wound up abandoning my date I have vandalized numerous cars and even house with spray paint and slashed tires I have also shoplifted quite a bit in the past My parents always wondered why I never had many friends and its because I was a bully I was giving a gay kid shit for screwing something up and he turned it into a homophobia argument Lasagna is just spaghetti cake [/spoiler]

I want to brutally kill my classmates

I'm kinda unsatisfied with my life. Like I mean I don't really know what I want in life. I used to have a crush on a girl 8 months ago but it stopped cause I picked a separate college course to her whilst she went on to get a full time job, my group from the last course with her on organised a "goodbye meal" and I planned to tell her my feelings for her then, but the meal never happened so stuff kinda fell flat for me and now I don't really know what person to look for in terms of love anymore. I want someone but I can't be bothered, get what I mean? My current college course. One minute I'm content with it next minute I hate it. It leaves me feeling unsatisfied and contemplating my choice constantly. My life outside of college. Ugh. I love it but I hate it it at the same time. All I ever do is play xbone and do next to nothing around the house unless told to. I try to get out of the house as much as I can but I have two close friends who are always spending time with their girlfriends and not wanting to spend time with me too much. It's like I'm stuck in a constant tedious loop of life and I can't escape it. I'm not depressed or anything I'm just fed up of being vaguely miserable most of the time.

I still greave my dogs death...

Every time I speak my opinion at the house I get yelled at. Let me kind of take you back to my childhood.. Around the house, I was always told to be respectful and calm and quiet. I was always like this, but at school - when I could escape my home - I was my true self. A fun-loving kid (excluding my later years where I was bullied). One day, I had a fantastic experience in classes and came home all jazzed up and happy. I was running upstairs, getting my books and sprinting down to get to my spot where I read when suddenly I hear the scream. It's my parents shouting at me to be quiet. So I nod and agree to myself that I might've been tromping about, so I'm sure to walk quieter. However, when I get to my spot and sit down to read with a big smile on my face, my parents walk to me and ask me one question related to my smile, my happy aura, my overall appreciation to be home and said: "What's wrong with you?" Not in a funny way, or a snarky way either; they saw the real me once and they immediately wondered what my malfunction was. Ever since that day, I have only said bare necessities to my parents: [i]Yes, no,[/i] etc. Before you ask though: no, I haven't been holding one grudge for this many years. It's been everything up to this point. When I was being bullied severely all my parents did was tell me to suck it up and move schools. When I attempted to take my own life, I was told I was stupid. I've been making my own meals and buying my own food for the past seven years, as well as buying my own school supplies/etc. Now, though, I'm getting ready to move out and they've been trying to butter me up and act nice-ish to me. So, my question to you all is - What do I do? Do I reciprocate the feelings and forgive them, or do I stay cold towards them for treating me the way they have?